Thursday, May 9 by

Tom Hanks Battles Pirates In The Not Very Swashbuckling ‘Captain Phillips’ Trailer

These Somali pirates were wise not to attack Russell Crowe, instead they set they’re sights on Hollywood nice guy Tom Hanks. Here he plays the titular Captain Phillips, a man already ill-fated enough to have to spend all of his time on some dumbass boat whose situation goes from bad to worse when pirates board his vessel and try to take over. We can all agree that’s not cool. I bet they didn’t even go to captain school.

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