'The Hobbit' Trailer Teases More Middle-Earth Hijinks

Those Hobbits and their epic quests.... After having us wait around all day not knowing when a safe time to take a dump would be, the trailer for The Hobbit finally debuted online late tonight. And the verdict is: Peter Jackson has made the Lord of the Rings again. For the most part. The Shire looks the same. Gandalf looks the same. It does seem like there have been some advancements in dwarf make-up. It's like a rogue's gallery of weird-looking European men. I feel like I'm on the bus to Brighton Beach. It's a fair enough critique. The film does look similar to its predecessors in most ways, but not in all. Notably absent from this teaser were any gay-looking or effeminate men. Thorin Oakenshield is the only new character that stands out, and he looks pretty badass. Whether Bilbo has a male stalker or not remains to be seen (Gollum doesn't count).

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There's A F*&% Ton Of Dwarves In This Dwarf-Inclusive Trailer For 'The Hobbit'

I like Gloin the best. While the original trailer for The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey gave us much to ooo and aaa over, it was decidedly lacking dwarf. That oversight has been remedied. By simply pointing the camera downward, Peter Jackson discovered that there were dwarves in those scenes after all, and now all thirteen are introduced. If you're bad with names, I suggest making space in your memory palace for Fili, Kili, Oin, Gloin, Thorin Oakenshield, Dwalin, Balin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Dori, Nori, and Ori. Perhaps creating a pneumonic device will help.


Put Down That Book. It's 'The Hobbit' Trailer

This unexpected journey has everything you'd expect. Nerds were dealt a blow earlier this week when they got their first look at RoboCop's rebooted body. They've suffered enough. Here as a reward for their hardships, is the full trailer for Peter Jackson's The Hobbit. It's got all of the things Tolkien fans like. Short people, weird magic, mountains, pointy hats, pointy ears, caves, hard to pronounce words, men gazing forlornly at one another, and crumbling walkways and bridges. Oh man, does it ever have crumbling walkways and bridges.


See Video Of Peter Jackson’s ‘The Hobbit’ Being Made Before Your Very Eyes

It's a great way for you to check up on 'The Hobbit', to make sure everything's going OK. There are two types of movie fans - those who just go to movies as they come out, and those who enjoy immersing themselves in the minutiae of production, AKA people who would want to watch production videos from the set of Peter Jackson's The Hobbit. If you're of the latter group, then you probably want to watch the above video, which is only the first of what will presumably be a regularly updated series, perfect for the kind of OCD movie fans Jackson caters to. If not, you can go read about something else. This is a judgment-free zone.


Links Away: Behind The Hobbit

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Listen To This 'Hobbit' Rap, Or Else

They're like white Bushwick Bills. We all assumed that Hobbits would be excellent rappers, but now our friends at The Warp Zone have offered up some definitive proof. It's our great pleasure to offer up, the "Misty Mountain Rap," which looks like it may have been filmed in Griffith Park, but I'm sure was actually filmed on location in Middle Earth. It's ok. Getting filming permits in Middle Earth is supposed to be like, this huge quest. Someone should make a story about it.


What If 'The Hobbit' Were A Standalone Film? This Is The Trailer For That

We don't have all day. Initially, The Hobbit films were not planned as a trilogy but the storytelling opportunities proved too sprawling and the decision was made to stretch the tale across three films. Also, the glue they use on Ian McKellan's beard is really tough to get off so Peter Jackson decided to just keep shooting until it could be removed. However, if The Hobbit were just one film that didn't force fans to buy three tickets at higher 3D prices, it would be one of the most epic films in history. And here's what the trailer for that one film that tells the tale of a Hobbit journeying to a mountain would look like.


Honest Trailer — The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

Before you say goodbye to Middle Earth with The Battle of the Five Armies, relive The Desolation of Smaug, the bloated second chapter in Peter Jackson's mercilessly long Hobbit trilogy. Before you say goodbye to Middle Earth with The Battle of the Five Armies, relive The Desolation of Smaug, the bloated second chapter in Peter Jackson's mercilessly long Hobbit trilogy. Become a Screen Junkie! ?? http://bit.ly/sjsubscr Watch more Honest Trailers ?? http://bit.ly/HonestTrailerPlaylist