Wednesday, February 1 by

MILLENNIUM FALCON FOUND AT BOTTOM OF BALTIC SEA!!!

A group of treasure hunters (sweet) were presumably hunting for treasure when they came across what is definitely the Star Wars vessel the Millenium Falcon on the floor of the Baltic Sea between Sweden and Finland. In related news, that’s almost exactly where I told people it would be. I was telling people that I thought it would be very near the coast of Denmark, which it pretty much is.

The item that is absolutely the Millenium Falcon is thought to be 197 feet wide and is submerged in 250 feet of water, with track marks of upturned sea floor 1,600 feet long, indicating that the object crashed. You know, like a spaceship would.

Many are speculating what could be inside the Millennium Falcon, but I’ll save everyone from the suspense. You’re going to find a regular-sized skeleton wearing a black vest and a giant skeleton with a bandolier over its left shoulder.

With that mystery solved, we should probably get to work on cloning them, no?

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