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Robert De Niro And John Cusack Accept Bags Of Cash To Appear In 'Bag Man'

It's the only explanation. After years of doing anything for a paycheck, it's a bit surprising it took this long for Robert De Niro and John Cusack to cross paths. It's like De Niro wasn't even offered Hot Tub Time Machine. Despite De Niro's hairdo, The Bag Man is not a comedy. Yet a thriller that sends John Cusack to a seedy motel to hang out with that actress who will most likely get naked. They don't come right out and say that in the trailer, but it's heavily implied. This trailer shows so much of her skin, you'd think the wardrobe van was stolen.


One Last 'Karate Kid' Trailer (Sans Karate)

Jaden Smith is better than you at life.Sony has released the final trailer for The Karate Kid reboot starring Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith. The film, which premieres this weekend, looks pretty good, provided you can overlook two annoying flaws. I'm sure I'm not the first to point out that the film lacks any actual karate, which is from Japan, and instead focuses on kung-fu, which is from China. It's like remaking Eight Men Out, but having them play Cricket, or remaking Squirt Woman 2 and having it focus on "water sports." There's a big difference. The second barrier to enjoying the film is Jaden Smith. Based on the trailer, he seems like he might be a decent actor. But the fact that a 12-year-old kid will probably nail more women this weekend than I will in my entire life makes it hard for me to concentrate. Instead of focusing on the kung-fu, I just keep tracing the veins in my wrist with the corner of my debit card over and over again.  Weird, huh? (First Showing) Enjoy the last Karate Kid trailer after the jump.


Parents Continue To Torment Their Kids On Halloween, All For Jimmy Kimmel

They lied to their kids about eating all their candy. Really nice work, parents. If you're like me, you love lying to/disappointing children. So every year, when Jimmy Kimmel does his annual, "parents lie about eating their kids' candy and tape it," I get pretty fired up. Because watching kids cry is funny for those at arm's length, and one day, it will provide the children something to laugh about with their therapists. Hilarious! I sort of got the joke when Kimmel first did this, and thought it was pretty funny. However, after a few years, I think it spotlights some truly deranged parents, and Kimmel, though I understand why he's doing it, is playing a pretty instrumental part in f*cking with the heads of these kids. DOES HE KNOW HOW IMPORTANT CANDY IS TO CHILDREN? There's nothing more important.


'Insidious' Teaser Boasts Wilson, Byrne, Creepy Kid

Pretty white people + creepy little kid + a bunch quick cuts = James Wan's 'Insidious'! Take some pretty white people, throw in a creepy little kid with pale eyes, and stir in a bunch quick cuts. Season with tense music stings and you've a recipe for success, or at least, most horror films from the last five years. Here's the teaser from James Wan's (Saw) latest. The film comes out April first, and you'd be a fool not to see it!* *I instantly regret that pun. Please forgive me. (The Playlist)


'Diary Of A Wimpy Kid 2' Poops In Church

Religious extremists are going to have a field day with this one. Looks like we've got another Passion Of The Christ on our hands. It's been about a year since the first Diary Of A Wimpy Kid was released, and Fox isn't letting up on divulging the wimpiness of this kid. The trailer opens with jokes about pooping your pants in church. Great. Religious extremists are going to have a field day with this one. Looks like we've got another Passion Of The Christ on our hands. In Diary Of A Wimpy Kid 2: Rodrick Rules, the little geek is tormented by a young Jimmy Fallon clone named Rodrick. And man, that Rodrick DOES rule. With his tussled hair, one-handed folding technique, extreme driving, and you know he's hiding pot somewhere in that wimpy household. When Steve Zahn finds it, Rodrick will play it off. "Just holding it for a friend, Dad. Now can I get back to practicing my fingering?" For the guitar, of course, you guys.


‘NEDS’ Tells The Compelling Story Of A Good Kid Going Bad

Being bad has never felt so Scottish. "Lilies that fester smell far worse that weeds." Some British dude with a slinky around his neck said that, like, 50 years ago. Well, in NEDS, writer/director Peter Mullan demonstrates that overachieving Scottish boys can fester as well, and the result is pretty damn cool. NEDS (or Non-Educated Delinquents to those that haven't read this blurb) focuses on John McCill, a teenage boy with a bright future who lives in the shadow of his troublemaker older brother. As the streets come calling to young John, he is left with no semblance of support structure, and finds himself cracking skulls and misbehaving to save his life and his sanity. Study hall turns into make-out sessions and skull-cracking. Movies about good people falling apart are always gold, and this one seems raise the bar for the genre.