The Human Fund
A tale of redemption. With lots of editing.
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A tale of redemption. With lots of editing.
Yup, he says, "I'll be back." Since Super Bowl ads are now considered entertainment, much to marketers' delight, companies are leaking them earlier and earlier. This Terminator: Genisys trailer, to run on Sunday's game, is no exception. It's a Super Bowl ad that runs before the Super Bowl. Which I guess just makes it an ad. Whatever. It's Terminator, and I think we're all interested to see if we can ignore the past two and get back to the greatness of 1 and 2. From the looks of this...Can we? (Deadline)
You're gay if you DON'T want to see this. That's just what I feel. In case Katy Perry, Al Pacino, Stephen Colbert, Tina Fey, Jack McBrayer, Bill O’Reilly, Amy Poehler, Seth Rogen, Jerry Seinfeld, Jason Sudeikis (who's banging Olivia Wilde, which puts him in a whole other realm of respect), Anderson Cooper, Jimmy Kimmel, and Julianne Moore weren't reason enough to turn in to Comedy Central's Night of Too Many Stars, there's one more name that puts the sum of all those others to shame. Yup. Ron Fuckin' Swanson. Nick Offerman. He'll be raising money for autism (against autism, actually) and for every $1,000 he receives, he'll get a little more naked. What's not to like? Charity, Nick Offerman, burly, mustachioed nudity. This program is shaping up to have it all.
Sienna Guillory looks really good with her clothes off. Antonio Banderas is on the hunt for a stripper. And not in the Charlie Sheen Most Dangerous Game kind of way. In The Big Bang, he plays a private investigator hired by a giant to find his missing stripper girlfriend, Sienna Guillory, and the $30 million worth of diamonds she's carrying. Along the way he encounters danger, Snoop Dogg on a porn set, James Van Der Beek, Autumn Reeser's horny waitress, and Sam Elliott as a gazillionaire visionary trying to re-create the Big Bang beneath the desert. Sounds all well and good, but just show more of the stripper, guys. Seriously.
Call me strange, unconventional, or absolutely out of my friggin' mind, but I like the idea of combining Jessica Alba's reported role as a prostitute with her character in Fantastic 4. I think the country needs a forcefield wielding super hero street walker with the power of invisibility. Call me strange, unconventional, or absolutely out of my friggin' mind, but I like the idea of combining Jessica Alba's reported role as a prostitute with her character in Fantastic 4. I think the country needs a forcefield wielding super hero street walker with the power of invisibility. Who's with me? Jessica Alba to play a prostitute (Filmonic) This makes my brain hurt (Filmdrunk) Two new Star Trek posters (Comingsoon) Brett Ratner will direct Conan (Empire) Ennio Morricone to score Inglourious Basterds? (/films) Danny Boyle to helm 28 Months Later? (CHUD)
Before Terminator: Genisys hits theaters, relive the greatest Terminator film of them all - Terminator 2: Judgment Day! Hasta la vista, good Terminator movies! Before Terminator: Genisys hits theaters, relive the greatest Terminator film of them all - Terminator 2: Judgment Day! Hasta la vista, good Terminator movies! Got a tip? Email us ? email@example.com Follow us on Twitter ? http://twitter.com/screenjunkies Like us on Facebook ? http://www.fb.com/screenjunkies Series Created by Andy Signore http://twitter.com/andysignore & Brett Weiner Written by Spencer Gilbert, Dan Murrell, Erica Russell, and Andy Signore Edited by Dan Murrell, Anthony Falleroni, and Jason Inman
What is happening in this timeline? So much for genuine surprise. The marketing team behind Terminator: Genisys tried to hook you all in with just a few vague morsels about the topsy-turvy timeline that the new film introduces. But that wasn't good enough for you. Then, they went J.K. Simmons-heavy in their previews, but still you said no. Since we can't have anything nice, they've gone ahead and started to show us twists that would have been really enjoyable not spoiled prior to seeing them in the theater. This won't stop until you: A.) Acknowledge that the movie looks good. B.) They show us the entire thing through previews and trailers. This move is called pulling a Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
I've never seen anything this insane outside the insides of my own eyelids. This batshit cut-down of bonkers action comes from Enthiran, India's most expensive movie. No offense to Arnold, but why can't our Terminator do this? I've never seen anything this insane outside the insides of my own eyelids. Cars get flipped through the air, entire armies are killed within seconds, a horde of robots have the channel the powers of a boss level from Smash TV, and a helicopter is karate chopped out of the sky. Finally, a robot that might be able to stand up to Chuck Norris. (Cartoon Brew)
The rules have been reset. The trailer of Terminator: Genisys begins with a naked Kyle Reese floating in a time machine while resistance leader John Connor and several others stare at his wang with hopeful eyes. However, the 1984 that he expected to travel back to no longer exists. There's been some kind of rift that's created an alternate universe where Sarah Connor is a badass with an aged T-800 for a father. It sets the stage for big rewards for fans of the first two films by re-purposing iconic characters, dialogue, locations, and sequences. I know it looks confusing, but if this new direction works the pay-off will be worth it. Think of it as being awesome in all of the ways that Back to the Future II is (multiple versions of one character in the same timeline; scenes revisited), but with the added bonus of killer robots, your favorite Terminator catchphrases, and Arnold Schwarzenegger back in Mr. Olympia shape thanks to the miracles of CGI.
So Terminator-y. While we still have to wait to see the first trailer for Terminator: Genisys, we at least can enjoy a quick glimpse thanks to this teaser trailer. In it you'll see things you've seen before like the T-1000 morphing, nuclear war across the globe, and Arnold with a skinny little robot arm. Good luck recreating this one in Legos, nerds. It's interesting because there was no advance word that the T-1000 would be featured in the film. Who else could return? Danny Cooksey, perhaps? We'll find out tomorrow.