Conan Auditions Wives a la Tom Cruise

Which is creepier, Scientology or red hair? There aren't that many women who can both strap on your fake-butt AND impersonate Ray Romano. If you find one, she's a keeper.

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Tom Cruise Wants The Truth, Once Again, In Latest 'Oblivion' Trailer

This guy's always chasing the truth. The last trailer for Joseph Kosinski's Oblivion offered very little beyond showing Tom Cruise flying around in a ship that looks like the Ambiguously Gay Duo penis car, and that was a wise move. We were able to process the film's setting, marvel at the special effects and get all the Wall-E jokes out of our system. This time around, we're treated to the film's actual plot. Tom Cruise stars as a drone repairman who lives in orbit with his wife. By day, he helps clean up the surface of a dead Earth and eliminate the alien beasts that still inhabit it. His life is shaken up when he begins to experience visions of a woman he's never met, and is pulled into a conspiracy when that mystery woman arrives on Earth via escape pod. It looks like it combines elements from several existing science fiction films. Except Battlefield Earth. Scientology learned their lesson with that one.


Strap On Your Jet Pack For The 'Tomorrowland' Trailer

Yesterday gave us a glimpse of what Brad Bird has in store with the retro-futuristic Tomorrowland. Today, we get to see those pictures move. The future is now. The second live action feature from Bird stars Britt Robertson as a girl who discovers a passage to a less crappy world where science has made anything possible. Even hover boards, one would assume. George Clooney also stars and puts on his best car commercial voice-over voice to sell the sh*t out of this movie to the audience.


Tom Cruise Comfortable Around Boobs In 'Rock Of Ages' Trailer

He's so chill with Russell Brand. The trailer for Adam Shankman's Rock of Ages is here and it has everything you'd expect. Big stars with terrible haircuts, hot babes, and your favorite '80's rock anthems made faaaabulooousssss. That's not to say that it looks bad. The whole thing is handled in a tongue-in-cheek way and the jokes hit exactly as they should. This is mostly thanks to Words with Friends champion, Alec Baldwin. He may not be a courteous flyer but the man can sell a vomit joke. Other notable standouts are Tom Cruise, Catherine Zeta-Jones and Malin Akerman. Cruise because he nails the bored rock star part, Zeta-Jones because she chews the scenery as an uptight conservative protestor and Malin Akerman because you almost see her boobs.


New Creepier 'Apollo 18' Trailer

I'm definitely not going to the moon now. Apollo 18 has released its creepiest trailer yet, just days before launch. The found footage horror opens this Friday in theaters and from the looks of things, it's going to be scary. Much like Blair Witch made you afraid of the woods and Paranormal Activity made you afraid of houses, this one will really make you wary of going to the moon. This looks a lot scarier than the crap that Tom Hanks and Bill Paxton had to deal with.


Links Away: Tom Cruise's Australian Cousin?

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Tom Cruise Is The Future's Best Janitor In 'Oblivion' Trailer

Mop, mop, mop. Make it shine. Sixty years ago, planet Earth got all jacked up and now Tom Cruise has to clean it up. With just two weeks until off-planet retirement with the rest of mankind, Cruise gets pulled into a greater conspiracy involving alien creatures, Morlock Freeman, and what look to be clones. That said, it's all looks a bit mysterious so it's hard to latch onto what this movie's really about but at a glance I'd call it a blend of Tron: Legacy and I Am Legend. But in a good way.


Conan's 'Walking Dead' Episode Intro Is Perfect

And it didn't even involve bear masturbation. In order to kick off last night's special Walking Dead-themed episode of Conan, Coco visited the backwoods of Georgia to show how the late night host fared during the Zombie Apocalypse. It's incredibly well-done. All in all, I find Zombie Conan much more enjoyable than Zombie Jay Leno. My only qualm is that we didn't get to see a zombified Masturbating Bear. But that's really more of an issue for me to take up with science.


'Edge Of Tomorrow' Trailer: Tom Cruise Lives. Dies. Repeats.

A more explode-y 'Groundhog Day'. As he did in Oblivion, Tom Cruise is once again battling a total sucky future in Edge of Tomorrow. While Cruise hopes he is not doomed to repeat that film's performance at the box office, he is seemingly doomed to repeat this one mech-suit battle against alien squid robots. Awaking after each time he is murdered by those things from The Matrix, Cruise's character must "train" himself to survive and eventually win the war and probably totally bang Emily Blunt.