His beard has it's own beard. Or fists. Or something. I forget. The greatest Christmas gift of all isn't just a Chuck Norris video. It's a Chuck Norris video that upstages something Jean-Claude Van Damme did for Volvo. Why? I have no idea, but it's a slow news day, so we're trumping up the few posts we're making in a "run out the clock"-type situation that has us counting down until it's egg nog time. You know what? Screw it. It's egg nog time now. Merry Chuckmas, and Happy Norriskuh.