Rule 1: Always get legally drunk before doing anything, ever. Because you're skimping on your tuition, let's call this class 101 of the Screen Junkies MBA*. We've seen what Mr. Suave can do with a gun, a car, and a woman, but he's also got the chops of a magnate that we haven't seen since Gordon Gekko or Thomas Crown. Thank CollegeHack for the education you're about to get. Now let's watch the millions roll in... *Not a real MBA at all.