True Facts About Morgan Freeman
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When evil happens in Vegas, he slays in Vegas. We all know this plot by now. Some misguided thug beats up a woman who knows Jason Statham. He's then forced to maim and kill that thug's anonymous henchmen by a) judo chopping them in the throat, b) throwing them through glass, c) using an everyday object like a bicycle, belt, or luggage handle to beat them up, and d) all of the above simultaneously. All leading up to his headbutting to death their ringleader. There's no problem this man can't solve with a headbutt. However, something about this hackneyed, well-trodden path seems fresh, compelling, and original. Can't quite put my finger on it.
We also got Robert De Niro's rendition of Miley's 'Wrecking Ball' somehow. Turns out that Robert De Niro, Morgan Freeman, Michael Douglas, and Kevin Kline -- the Mt. Rushmore of acting -- will do pretty much anything you ask. And so, with Last Vegas in theaters this weekend and because the movie is about recapturing youth, we thought we'd have the patriarchs of cinema read lyrics from some of the most popular young musical artists of today. Morgan Freeman interprets Ylvis - "The Fox (What Does the Fox Say)", De Niro puts his spin on Miley Cyrus, Kevin Kline tackles One Direction, and Michael Douglas loves his "Chinese Food." We can't believe we actually got them to do this. Everybody go see Last Vegas like nine times this weekend! Rules.
This might not be a step forward for the adorable show. Almost all the charm of Adventure Time lies in its modest ambitions. It's a 15-minute show with cute stories and adorable characters. The stakes couldn't be lower, which is why it's so pleasant. It's also got us wondering what form the film will take. Hopefully, it will steer WAY clear of this approach. Someone decided to imagine Adventure Time as some overly-done anime. It's interesting, but something we'd ultimately never like to acknowledge again. Here you go: (A.V. Club)
I don't necessarily think Universal's 'Hop' looks 'Smurfs' bad, but the Russell Brand CG toon seems like stale old mini-Snickers. Anyone else see this formula as a standard template for many CG animated movies? Everybody knows that Easter Bunnies are supposed to deliver candy, but what if one Easter Bunny... played in a rock band? Everybody knows that pandas are supposed to be fat and slow, but what if one panda... became a kung-fu master? Everybody knows that super-villains are supposed to be evil, but what if one super-villian... became a loving father of three adopted children? Everybody knows that bees are supposed to make honey, but what if one bee... sued the entire human race in a court of law? That last one is actually what happens in Bee Movie. Yup, I saw Bee Movie, and that totally happens. Anyway, I don't necessarily think Universal's Hop looks Smurfs bad, but it also seems like stale old mini-Snickers at this point. The Russell Brand voiced cartoon/live action mix will be in theaters April 1st to cash in on families who can't get enough of that sweet, sweet Easter. (Deadline)
The ride has 52 different simulations, and many of them are not prequels-based. Admiral Ackbar's status in the Star Wars universe has risen from cult character to corporate spokesman. Witness the above promo for the newly revamped Star Tours 3D ride at Disneyland, opening today. The fishy-looking admiral is the star of the spot, with Darth Vader as kind of his sidekick. Darth Vader: Admiral Ackbar's Sidekick. I'm trying to comprehend the crazy awesome ridiculousness of that, but I don't think I have enough midichlorians. The new prequel to the original Star Tours has 52 different simulations, and many of them are not prequels-based. In the second video, you see some of the possible outcomes, like ending up face-to-ship with Vader. That opportunity is worth a little motion sickness, methinks. Of course, if I waited for 2 hours to ride it and ended up in Naboo, I'd be pretty pissed. This ride takes place between Episode III and IV, with C3p0 taking over piloting duties for the Paul Reubens voiced REX, but don't fear Disney nerds. You can visit with the bumbling bot in "Droid Customs" before the ride, getting used to his programming for the first time, I assume. (io9)
How you gonna mess with Nic Cage's hair like that?! Summit has dropped the trailer for Drive Angry 3D. Patrick Lussier directs Nicolas Cage, Amber Heard, William Fichtner, and David Morse in what looks like another Ghost Rider with a car standing in for a chopper. Cage plays a guy who breaks out of hell (what? how? what?) to get revenge against the cult that killed his daughter and took her baby. William Fichtner is the Devil's right-hand-man sent to bring him back. I gotta say, it's perfect casting with Fichtner. There's something always twitchy with that guy. I could totally see him doing Satan's bidding. Drive Angry 3D crashes into theaters February 11, 2011. Check out the trailer after the jump... Drive Angry: Trailer - Watch more Movie Trailers
Now THIS could sweep the BAFTAs. If I've had one criticism with filmmaking of late, it's that you never see characters go the bathroom. Seriously, you think Ethan Hunt can dangle off the world's tallest building without essing his underpees? I doubt it, considering the amount of running around he does. I mean, he's well-trained, but not that well-trained. The guys at FilmDunk/Frotcast also take issue with that decided lack of realism, and so a fan has heard their call and cut together this trailer for Warhorsey, the horse that poops. It's a more realistic approach to War Horse and solves the issue of what happens after Joey eats all that hay. Too bad that the original release didn't handle this subject matter. Would have swept the BAFTAs, I bet. Now this is more like it. Now get to work on a Ghost Protocol recut with a turd streaking down glass. (FilmDrunk)
All that squinting and mumbling has me thinking he's the next Clint Eastwood. Stop us if you've heard this one before: Jason Statham is a rogue tough-guy who gets by hustling and dealing with less-than-savory folks, all while wearing a grim face. That's right! It's most every Jason Statham film since Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. But there's a reason he keeps going back to that well. It works for him. Here in Wild Card, the Statham archetype is dropped in Vegas, hence the clever title. He runs around Sin City offering fun little nuggets like "I take care of things. That's all you need to know," which karate chopping everyone in his path. We're not complaining, because the film looks kind of fun, but it's nothing new, judging from this trailer.
He's no Dirk Diggler. Nick Swardson is getting into porn. No, not the hardcore stuff, silly. We've got the first trailer for his new comedy Bucky Larson: Born to be a Star. Bucky (Swardson) is a small town grocery bagger, going nowhere in life – until he discovers that his conservative parents were once adult film stars! Armed with the belief that he has found his destiny, Bucky packs up and heads out to LA, hoping to follow in his parents’ footsteps. One might assume Bucky does well in porn due to larger than average valuable asset, but it's quite the opposite. It's his average-sized member that skyrockets him to the top. See, men. Size doesn't matter. In fact, too much of something can be unsettling both aesthetically and physically. Bucky Larson releases in clean and decent theaters September 9, 2011.