‘American Reunion’ Red Band Highlights The Dangers Of Unsupervised Masturbation

Jason Biggs must have a cursed penis or something. Here he is in the red band trailer for American Reunion trying to enjoy some tug-time and once again, his plans go hazardously awry. Over the years he’s masturbated in front of his mom, got caught humping pie, and glued himself to himself. I don’t understand how he ever managed to create a child. Let alone one capable of opening doors.

God must really hate this guy.