'60 Minutes' Give Big Ups To Andy Rooney

Morley Safer pours a sip.

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Get Charmed To Death By Chris Pratt In Seven Minutes Of 'SNL' Promos

Macklin, you son of a bitch. In case you didn't know that Chris Pratt is an awesome, funny, and delightful person...HE IS. And rather than go through the many, many examples supporting this thesis, you can just watch this extended video of all the SNL promos Chris Pratt did for his upcoming hosting of the show's 40th season premiere. He's just about the most natural person in front of the camera. The comedy that most actors strive for, as well as their work to portray a level of comfort while being filmed. Ole' Pratty's got that in spades. I mean, who else can make seven minutes of video and have all of it be charming. It's a gift. A gift from him to us. WE LOVE YOU, STARLORD!


Andy Samberg and Blake Lively Just Had Sex

The Lonely Island is back with another SNL Digital Short, and like mature, grown men, they're boasting about their sexual conquests in song form. The Lonely Island is back with another SNL Digital Short, and like mature, grown men, they're boasting about their sexual conquests in song form. They always manage to churn out a catchy beat with a glossy, rap cliché-riddled music video. Andy Samberg and Jorma Taccone take the verses this time around with Akon handling the infectious hook. If you look hard you can catch Akiva Schaffer, the third Lonely Island member, giving the the guys a pedicure. Let's all scream this groove from the rooftops next time we're lucky enough to lay with a girl, in the biblical sense.


First Two Minutes Of 'Rio' Makes Me Reconsider The Ethics Of Bird Hunting

Here's a preview of the animated movie 'Rio.' The upcoming 'Rio' version of Angry Birds for iPhone sounds more promising, because maybe I'll get to destroy these fowl pheasants. Fox just released the first two minutes of their upcoming animated film Rio. The overly cheerful singing, the obnoxiously bright colors, the cute wittle baby bird who's just wearning how to fwy... Now I wish I was a bird, so I'd have the claws to claw my god damn eyes out. If you're really into The Enchanted Tiki Room at Disneyland, and not in a let's-get-high-and-laugh-at-how-retarded-this-is way, then this 3D movie is clearly for you. Rio is directed by Carlos Saldanha, who did all the Ice Age movies and Robots. So after this clip, that's really bad sign #2. However, a few promising elements are soaring above the mess of bird shit. The cast includes Jesse Eisenberg, Neil Patrick Harris and Anne Hathaway. Also, the plot doesn't sound too terrible: “A nerdy macaw who leaves the comforts of his cage in small town Minnesota and heads to Rio de Janeiro. He embarks on the adventure of a lifetime, learning to open himself up to all that life has to offer along the way.” Actually, the coolest sounding news surrounding Rio is that Rovio is making a Rio-themed sequel to their Angry Birds iPhone game. I'm an Angry Birds addict, so the thought of using these cloying birds as living weapons to destroy pigs in towers has me excited. Sexually excited? Let's not go there, but yes. Wait, I just read a little further and apparently you use the original Angry Birds to rescue the characters from Rio. So... now I'm thinking it's time to take my 28 gauge out of the tool shack, cause I'm declaring this bird season. (/Film and TheWrap)


60 Years In The Making: 'The Honeymoaners'

If only my grandma could have lived to see this. A few weeks back, I complained about the trailer for The Graduate XXX porn parody, claiming that the adult entertainment industry had officially run out of parody ideas. Well, perhaps I was a little too quick to judge, because we now have The Honeymoaners, a parody of the beloved 50's sitcom, The Honeymooners. I'm not sure a lot of 18-to-25-year-old guys (OK, let's be honest, 12-to-25-year-old guys) even know about The Honeymooners, which calls into question why anyone would parody it. But that fact aside, at least The Honeymooners lends itself to a funny name, and that's all a successful porn parody really needs! Well, that and some hot chicks, I suppose. This film even works in a porn parody of a classic 50's game show (The $69,000 question). Now that's dedication. In “The Honeymoaners,” Ralph Kramden, everybody’s favorite loveable loser, finally gets his chance to change his luck as a contestant on the television quiz show, "The $69,000 Question.” After overhearing the category of questions to test his knowledge, Ralph turns to his best friend Norton to teach him everything he knows about SEX! Together the boisterous big guy and sex-witted sidekick study their local horny hookers, slutty neighbor, and even their wild wives, Alice and Trixie. Ralph may finally hit the jackpot… or he may be left holding his own buzzer. I can't believe they didn't make a "pow, right the kisser joke," but I guess Family Guy beat them to it.


Check Out Nearly 2 Minutes From Season 2 Of 'Game Of Thrones'

If you think you can handle it, that is. For fans of the HBO series Game of Thrones, April 1 can't come soon enough. Not, not because people who like Game of Thrones are also statistically certain to enjoy harmless practical jokes on friends and loved ones - but because April 1 is when the show is set to come back on HBO. If this describes you, why not check out the ample above clip, with plenty of ominous line-readings and violent death. It's two minutes of Heaven!


The 'Exodus: Gods And Kings' Trailer Would Like Three Minutes Of Your Time

I'm not saying a Patrick Bateman appearance would be tasteful here, but it sure would be fun. Thank God someone's finally worked up the courage to make a movie about the Bible! Now we just need a film about war and a couple that falls in love and we'll have all of our bases covered. Exodus: Gods and Kings seems to be a bigger undertaking than most films that come out at the holidays, but this one is marketed to Bible folk AND people who love Christian Bale action films. So it's got something for everyone. The film is brought to us by Ridley Scott and will tell the story of Moses and his tribulations in the Old Testament. Look for it on December 12th, right before we forget about this stuff and focus on presents. (And if you think that it's a little ridickey-donkey that Christian Bale was cast as a Middle Eastern Jew from thousands of years ago, we discussed that.)


Links Away: Fo' Minutes of Dragon Tattooness

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