This Week In Movie News (You Actually Care About)

Saturday, March 29 by
 

Gwyneth Paltrow split with Chris Martin this week. Okay, now that we’re done re-reporting what so many other media outlets have for the sheer sake of once again calling out ol’ GOOP on what a pretentious jerk she is, let’s get to the good stuff we actually care about. Star Wars, Alien and Avengers, here we come!

Star Wars 7 May Feature a Return to Hoth
Metro UK reports on rumors that the Star Wars 7 crew (but no actors) will be headed over to Scandinavia for what will most likely be landscape shots. Could this be a return to Hoth? If so, could this be a reason for PETA to go all PETA in anticipation of possible Tauntaun abuse?

Prometheus 2 Goes Pre-Production
The Wrap reports that Ridley Scott’s Prometheus 2 will begin production this fall for a March 2016 release. The sequel is rumored to be a whole lot more “alien-y”, which we assumes means it’ll be less whatever-the-hell-the-first-one-was-y.

Cheech and Chong Return to the Big Screen
According to Rolling Stone, our favorite (and only) old, ethnic, pot-smoking duo will be teaming up with Super Troopers director Jay Chandrasekhar for a new film. No doubt it’ll be released in Colorado first – just to pay tribute.

Maleficent’s New International Trailer
Not sure what’s more frightening; witchy magic, fire-breathing dragons or those evil-as-hell cheek-bones.

Avenger 2’s Quicksilver Gets Ripped On by i09
i09 doesn’t like Quicksilver’s new look in the upcoming Avengers film – and neither do we frankly – but we’ll just have to put our faith in Whedon and all the technical wizardry that can be mustered to make a surf suit and sneaker-wearing dude who forgot to lose the chinstrap after Y2K look like a passable superhero.

Scarface Remake Locks Down Director Pablo Larrain
Technically, this is a remake of a remake; you see, the 1932 original was about an Italian immigrant, the 1983 film was about a Cuban immigrant and this iteration will be about a Mexican immigrant. Add Chilean director, Larrain, into the mix and we’ve got ourselves an awfully delicious potluck situation.

TMNT Goes Gritty
Hold the anchovies, cuz the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles trailer is live! Now, if we can just figure out the tone of this movie…gritty urban crime drama or goofy, cartoonish action flick? Eh, who cares; we’d never turn our back on childhood.

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