What do Lance Bass, the Kardashians, Gucci, and un-notable talented rich kids have in common? Nothing, except that they're all terrible, terrible subjects for reality shows specifically, and our attention in general.

That said, they're all getting their own shows on E!, a network that, along with A&E, Discovery, and TLC, has made a fortune underestimating the American public.

Oh my God. The Kardashian shows is called Khloe and Kourtney Take The Hamptons. Hopefully a delightful Bruce Jenner will make an appearance as a whimsical nanny or poolboy or something.

With a straight face, the president of E!, who I refuse to name on principal, said of the news, "E! continues to deliver for the pop culture fan through buzzy original programming, unparalleled entertainment news, and innovative digital initiatives."

Oh, it's buzzy all right. A little too buzzy, if you know what I mean.

I know you don't. Neither do I.