TLC's My Strange Addiction returns this Sunday at 10 EST/PST. The show has proven to be a treasure trove of Hey! WTF?! In its run we've met numerous people who put their lives at risk with their bizarre compulsions, like eating statues and showering upside down. Is it sad? Is it exploitative? Well, yes. It's TLC. But that doesn't mean it isn't interesting. In fact, one might say the show is.... addicting. But then that person would deserve to have a football hucked at their groin.

**side-steps football**
**blasted in head by potato gun**


So kick back, relax, lick some paper clips and check out this collection of My Strange Addiction's Strangest Addictions.

Lori Sleeps With Hair Dryer

This segment features Lori, a woman that likes to have the calming breeze of a hair dryer pointed at her at all times. Even while sleeping. This poor, poor, excessively dry woman. If only there were an invention that could help with this dependence. I'm sure she'd be a "fan" of it.

Addicted to Cats

A woman decides to devote all her time to cats rather than cultivating relationships with people because cats won't screw you over the way people will. That's very true. Unless there's a laser pointer in use. In that case, the cat is all like, "Laters!"

Eats Husband's Ashes

This one is totally heartbreaking. After losing her husband to a severe head trauma (when will we find a cure?), a grieving widow became used to carrying his urn with her everywhere she goes. She watches television with the urn and even cooks its favorite meals, which she doesn't eat because she much prefers TO EAT HER DEAD HUSBAND'S ASHES. That's tragic crazy. Everyone knows if you want to be able to talk to the dead, you have to smoke their ashes. When will this ignorance toward the central plot element of How High continue? It's shocking.

Adult Baby

My apologies if you feel that this episode should be pulled from rotation as it doesn't deal with an addiction per se. Rather, it deals with an alternative lifestyle choice made by people who aren't harming anyone with their actions. You may feel that the nature of the program paints the lifestyle choice in a negative light, but what are you going to do? Cry about it?

Toilet Paper Eater

Kesha eats toilet paper. What does she wipe her butt with? Bread? That would make an awesome episode.

Couch Cushion Eater

Being addicted to eating couch cushions must put a huge damper on your love life. My name is Adele. My interests include photgraphy, antiquing, hip-hop dance, and I will eat the f*** out of your couch, Ping me back if interested.

Addicted to Puppets

This is actually more common than you'd think. No one makes a big deal out of it when a male is addicted to shoving his fist up people's butts. It's a gross double standard.

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