While watching episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia over the years, a subtle but consistent pattern has emerged. The character of Dennis Reynolds, in addition to being vain and arrogant, has been slowly morphing into a full blown sexual predator. Whether it involves teabagging friends or demanding full penetration in action films, Dennis has been dropping constant hints over the last seven seasons that he is seriously sexually deranged. This week's season finale may shed new light on just how creepy Dennis is (Update: Now that it's aired, I was referring to the secret compartment in his car containing what can only be described as a rape kit... “I like to bind – I like to be bound!”), but in the meantime, lets examine some of the greatest moments in his disgusting, perverted, teabagging glory.

Underage Drinking: A National Concern

When the gang starts letting high school kids drink at the bar, it opens up a potential disaster for everyone, but especially Dennis. A high school senior blackmails him into taking her to the prom, and she threatens to tell the cops about Paddy's newly liberal I.D. policy if Dennis doesn't comply. Although the girl in question claims to be 18, Dennis is still nervous and shows resistances to dating her, acknowledging how wrong it seems. This little bit of conscience he displays doesn't last throughout the series, however.

Mac Bangs Dennis' Mom

Dennis is alarmed to discover that Mac has slept with his mom. He is even more horrified to discover that his attempts at revenge sex with Mac's Mom and later Charlie's mom are roundly rejected. His willingness to sleep with either of these women just for revenge is pretty disgusting, and is one of the early red flags at how detached Dennis is from intimacy.

The Aluminum Monster Vs. Fatty McGoo

Upon learning that a former high school classmate has hit it big with a women's clothing store, Dennis tries to sell her his fashion designs, which mostly consist of his crude drawings of large breasted women (these drawings appear repeatedly). The most fascinating moment of the episode comes when Dennis, while having his designs turned down, reveals that the words "no", "don't" and "stop" never work on him, because he's "a winner." The second most fascinating moment comes when Dennis puts on lipstick and a dress and attempts to model the clothes himself. It's bizarre, disquieting and awesome rolled into one.

Dennis Looks Like a Registered Sex Offender

Dennis has his dating life turned upside down when posters of a recently released sex offender go up all over town, and the convict looks just like him. He initially tries to play up his differences to the criminal by donning a fake moustache and taking off his shirt to show how chiseled he is, as opposed to the man in the posters. And he tries to teach fitness to children, to show that he cares about kids, and would never hurt them. It works out very poorly, and shows that while not a sex offender (at least not registered), Dennis is pretty out of touch with the norms of suspicious behavior.

The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis

After drawing a graph featuring more of his famous "large breasted women" sketches, Dennis, along with Mac and Charlie, tries to get a loan for an poorly conceived gasoline scheme. When they are turned down, Dennis immediately takes off his shirt in the bank and offers to bang the female loan officer, confident that she will be unable to turn him down. She does, which he of course blames on Mac and Charlie also taking off their shirts. Dennis' narcissism is sky high, as is his surprise at the existence of a female loan officer.

Mac's Banging the Waitress

This is a big step in the case towards Dennis being a pervert. It is discovered that Dennis not only videotapes all of his sexual encounters, but he also catalogues and rates the tapes. More disturbing is that his friends seem to be aware of this, and regard it as normal, at least for Dennis. Even more disturbing than that is the revelation that all the tapes are shot from the rear angle, so that only Dennis' balls and ass are visible. Actually, this is what his friends seem to take issue with more than anything.

Mac and Charlie Die, Parts 1 & 2

In the first half of this two-parter, Dennis visits an Eyes Wide Shut-style orgy with Frank, hoping to broaden his sexual horizons. Although Dennis isn't at all worried about attending an orgy with the man who raised him, he does seem upset when the sex party features a mostly over 50 crowd and a buffet table. In Part 2, Dennis begins partying with a series of Eastern European models. He demands that they don't tell him their names, as it would ruin the thrill for him. Still searching for anonymous sex, Dennis almost uses a glory hole he recently found in the Paddy's restroom, before discovering Frank on the other side. It's pretty awful.

The Gang Exploits the Mortgage Crisis

While attempting to exploit the mortgage crisis, Dennis and Mac discuss various "scenarios" to engage in. One of them involves killing a woman's husband, smearing the walls with her children's blood, and taking her into the basement for a "frenzied free for all." In the end, they opt out of this particular plan, but even so, the mere thought of it is a big red flag... I mean a really big red flag.

Paddy's Pub: Home of the Original Kitten Mittens

In an extremely disturbing moment, Dennis offers his services to an attorney after learning the man's marriage is on the rocks. In short: Dennis offers to "frame bang" the lawyer's wife, so that he can accuse her of infidelity and keep his assets in the divorce. This, according to Dennis, consists of sneaking into the couples house while the wife is sleeping so he could "ease into her real nice." Yikes!

The D.E.N.N.I.S. System

Possibly the most famous Dennis centered episode, The D.E.N.N.I.S System features Dennis' fool proof method for seducing and abandoning any woman while making her completely obsessed with him in the process. Aside from the absolute callousness of the plan, it features the crucial step "Nurture Dependence," in which Dennis calls the woman in question from a payphone, and, using a disguised voice, threatens to kill her. This allows him to step in and "protect her" from a threat he invented. It's a shocking moment, but it gave us the "Welcome to hell" scene featured above, which pretty much totally redeems it.

The Gang Buys a Boat

A watershed moment for "Dennis is a creep"-oligists, Dennis describes his plans for getting women onto his newly purchased boat so he can have sex with them while out on the water. This itself isn't so bad, until Dennis elaborates to Mac that the girls will have no choice but to have sex with him, due to the "implication" that something awful could happen to them out at sea. Dennis' attempts to clarify only make things worse, using the logic that it isn't rape if the women are choosing to have sex with him, which they will certainly do, again because of the "implication," leaving Mac, and the audience, confused and horrified.

Thunder Gun Express

This recent episode features another new facet to Dennis' perversion. Along with videotaping his sex, he also preserves audiotapes, which he can listen to while driving. One particular tape reveals a near miss with an underage girl. Although the tape makes it clear that Dennis did not have sex with her, the incident was pretty stunning. Later in the show, our degenerate hero partakes in classic Dennis, lying to a woman he crashed into about owning an auto body shop so that she'll go to a movie with him. That this all ends with the lucky lady giving Dennis a hand job in a crowded movie theater is one more testament to Dennis' skills in seduction and absolute depravity.

Keep calm and read on....

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