We were all shocked yesterday to find out that Fox is threatening the cast of The Simpsons with cancellation should they not agree to significant paycuts. Though, after twenty-three seasons, there are many out there that agree it might be time to retire the show. It's not exactly terrible, but it's also not what it once was. It's probably too late for the series to go out in a blaze of glory, but it's not too late for it to take a semi-gracious bow. Unlike these shows, who overstayed their welcome just like my friend Greg does at parties. That f*ckin' guy.


This isn't a dis against Lassie. It was a great show, but how did they manage 588 episodes? When your kid is constantly getting trapped in mineshafts and pipes and falling into the lake (twice), it's time to reassess. First, move away from the country. It's too damn dangerous with all the falling hazards, rattlesnakes, and drifters passing through. You might also want to consider getting Timmy some help. The boy must have problems if he's continually acting out in this way. You know what, never mind. I think a call to Children's Protective Services is in order. It's irresponsible parenting, even if your dog has an excellent understanding of the English language and the ability to decipher pantomime.

Prison Break

We all hung in there after the actual priso break mainly because it was kind of fun to see convicts on the run, even though it involve rubber hands and DB Cooper's gold. Then season three landed the gang back in prison, albeit a tougher, more dangerous, more Panamanian prison, which was a fun return to form. Then the fourth and final season happened and it was totally bonkers. Somehow, the escapees were drafted to become a team of industrial spies conducting impossible missions in order to clear their names. And T-Bag got an office job. WTF?

Then, to drag the story out even further, a direct-to-DVD movie was released. That's enough closure, Prison Break. Thanks!!

According To Jim

182 episodes of a Jim Belushi sitcom is 182 too many. How often can one watch "The Belush" getting into messy scrapes, chomping cigars and singing blues songs while hanging out with and not appreciating a wife who is way too hot for him is? I'll never understand how a show like this thrives while awesome comedies live on the brink of cancellation.


When you need to bring John Stamos in to revive your medical drama, it might be time to announce it dead on the table. E.R. finally threw in the towel after 467 seasons (approximately) and very little of the original cast still involved. They actually had to bring in actors to replace the actors hired to replace the original actors.

Battlestar Galactica

With a tepid final season and frustrating conclusion, Battlestar Galactica took a big slide in quality. The early seasons were some of the best science fiction ever made, but it suffered (as did Lost) from the mistake of trying to inject too much mystery and religious symbolism into the story. The show was awesome when it was about killer robots and political intrigue. Not so much when it was about chasing a little girl around an opera house and being visited by angel-ghosts.


Much like Lassie, Entourage suffered from showing the same scenario over and over and over again. Vince gets in trouble. Then Vince gets out of trouble and all conflicts are resolved. Then again, Lassie was pretty lacking in the scantily-clad model category and Entourage excelled at that. I thought dogs were supposed to be babe magnets.

Home Improvement

ABC should have stuck a fork in this one once the kids hit puberty. It was disturbing to watch them slowly mutate over eight seasons. Risky move for family television.

The X-Files

The X-Files was in trouble before David Duchovny decided to leave. Why they would drag the series on after his departure is as mysterious as the subject matter itself. The story was enthralling for the first five seasons, but when the film X-Files: Fight the Future only served up more questions and no resolution, it was obvious the writers didn't know where the story was heading after all. By the end, it was one big confusing soap opera with spaceships and guys with black eyes.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Let's suppose that Buffy stayed dead when she sacrificed herself by jumping into the portal to the Hell dimensions, and wasn't resurrected and didn't move from The WB to the budgetarily-challenged UPN Network. What did we really gain from the sixth and seventh seasons, besides the musical episode, of course? That was awesome television, but was it worth it to see such a beloved and unique serie choke on its own vomit before passing out and farting itself to death?

Sometimes, a TV show isn't on long enough. Check out 8 Shows That Would Have Lasted Longer On A Different Network.

Or just check out these 17 Bounce-Tastic Sofia Vergara Gifs.