9 Possible Shows For Glenn Beck’s New Cable Network

Right-wing talkshow host Glenn Beck is considering leaving Fox News and setting up his own cable network. Much like Oprah Winfrey’s OWN, Beck’s network would feature personalities and programing hand picked by the man himself. But running a network takes a lot of work, and more importantly, a lot of original programing. Here are nine possible shows that will get the ball rolling.

Mexican Cooking with Tom Tancredo

Rep. Tom Tancredo shows you how to prepare authentic Mexican dishes made with real Mexicans.

The Right Answer

A “Jeopardy” styled game show in which your success depends on giving the answer that Glenn Beck believes to be right, regardless of whether it is actually correct.

America’s Next Top Ankle-Length Denim Skirt Model

Modern Family Minus the Queers and the Mexican Chick

A new twist on a recent favorite, this version offers all the laughter of ABC’s show, without all the uncomfortable homosexuality and crazy accents.

Extreme Homo Makeover

This inspirational reality show offers free homosexual conversion therapy to needy families.

CJCLDS: Miami

This drama follows the fast-paced world of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints Miami Bureau.

Shoot for the Stars: with Ted Nugent

In this “Apprentice”-styled show, washed-up celebrities are hunted for sport by right-wing rocker, Ted Nuggent.

The Real Housewives of Tempe

A camera crew follows five housewives in Tempe, AZ, as they spend their days shopping at Walmart and chain smoking at a nearby Indian casino.

You Beck Your Life

GITMO prisoners are forced to play Russian Roulette for the amusement on the master of ceremonies, Glenn Beck.

Special Thanks to Penn Collins