7 Paula Deen Recipes That Would Give Superman Diabetes

Wednesday, January 18 by

Brown Sugar Bacon

How does one take bacon from being a decadent guilty please to a deadly weapon? Candy the shit out of it and make it its own course. You know how some people eat a rice cake when they’re back from the gym? This is like that except you’re eating a slab of candied bacon after watching The Voice.

This simple recipe calls for dredging bacon in brown sugar and chili powder, then tossing it in the oven until crisp.

Lady’s Brunch Burger

Without commentary, here’s the last line of the recipe from pauladeen.com:

“Place burger patties on English muffins or buns, and if desired, on glazed donuts, as the buns. Top each burger with 2 pieces of bacon and a fried egg. “

Skillet Fried Apple Pie

You know how apple pies generally consist of apple filling placed in between two crusts, then baked? That’s for pussies. This recipe calls for two cans of buttermilk biscuits. Two doughy, processed biscuits form a seal around a dollop of filling. The filling is canned, by the way. You then deep fry the apple-biscuit pouches for two minutes per side. Then you add some whipped cream and powdered sugar for flavor. Yeah!

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