6 Curb Your Entusiasm Quotes That Were Made Up On The Spot

Tuesday, November 29 by Joseph Gibson

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Larry David's HBO sitcom "Curb Your Enthusiasm" is famous for its use of improvisational rather than scripted dialogue. David writes out a story for each episode, tells his actors what has to happen in the scene, and then they're free to make up the dialogue for themselves. This gives "Curb Your Enthusiasm" a unique, free-flowing feel that distinguishes it from that other show Larry David created – "Seinfeld." Curb isn't any less quotable than that show, though. To prove it, here are six "Curb Your Enthusiasm" quotes that were made up on the spot.

"Hey, I hate myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that I'm Jewish." "Jewish humor" is one of the hallmarks of "Curb Your Enthusiasm." And while this particular line may not be the most politically correct example of the form, Larry's response to the accusation that he's a self-loathing Jew is still classic Larry David. The quote has a limited number of uses, the most obvious being if somebody says you're a "self-loathing _____." If this happens to you a lot, consider cracking this one out and modifying it for your own purposes.

"You been scrounging around, looking for asses?" One of the hidden treasures of "Curb Your Enthusiasm" is Ms. Wanda Sykes, who always finds exactly the right tone to use to shout at Larry. This line has to do with Larry's perceived ass fetish, and reading it in print doesn't do justice to hearing Wanda saying it. And it's a great quote to use when dealing with the ass fetishist in your life. If you don't have an ass fetishist in your life, well, what's wrong with you? Rectify this as soon as possible.

"Larry, why would you do that?" Cheryl Hines as Larry's perpetually vexed wife is probably the most underrated part of the "Curb Your Enthusiasm" ensemble. And while "Curb" doesn't generally go for catch phrases, this is the closest thing that Cheryl's got. And just like Cheryl, you can use it every time the Larry in your life does something colossally stupid (or courageous, depending on your point of view).

"Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to imagine what it's like not to be able to hear them. It's not that bad." Sometimes Larry David acts as a kind of philosopher on "Curb Your Enthusiasm." Here he tries to put life in perspective in a way that's either insightful or insensitive, depending on your constitution. You can do the same thing, only your "philosophy" might be a little less impressive given you got it from a TV show. Whatever works, though.

"They're not breasts, they're just big chemical balls, okay?" Here's Larry in righteous crusader mode, striking a blow against the scourge of breast enhancements. Whether or not you agree with his analysis will probably play a big part in whether you choose to use this quote in your life, but you can't deny his way with words, can you?

"Got to plumb! Plumb the depths! The depths of hell!" Another lovable trait of Larry's is his penchant for bizarre non-sequiturs. Here's a gem he broke out to a plumber working on a restaurant he's investing in. You, on the other hand, can use this any time plumbing comes up in conversation. And since the original quote didn't make much sense, neither do you!

These "Curb Your Enthusiasm" quotes were all improvised, just like every line on "Curb Your Enthusiasm." We were unfortunately unable to print any quotes from the character of Susie – this is a family publication after all.