5 TV Bands Who Made Better Music Than Television

Sunday, February 12 by Jeff Keleher

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One common rite of passage is the formation a (typically crummy) band in one’s formidable years. It's a great way for us to express ourselves during our youth, before realizing that song-writing isn't as easy as pop stars make it seem. Whether busy wooing Kelly Kaposki, battling the undead, or enduring "Squigglevision", television characters are not immune to this phenomena either. Fortunately, TV execs had the resources to hire songwriters for these TV bands so they could produce listenable tunes, but that doesn't mean that the shows themselves were particularly good. Check out these five band who made better music than TV!


Zack Attack, “Saved by the Bell”

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Formed by the conspicuously Jessie Spano-less Bayside crew, Zack Attack never moved beyond their garage practice space. As evidenced by Zack’s fevered dreams, however, Zack Attack’s ceiling seemed to be some sort of late-80’s version of the Bay City Rollers. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Keep reaching for the stars, Morris. Your sweet hair-do and catchy pop tunes are infinitely better than "The College Years" of the show.

Dingoes Ate My Baby, "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"

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When not battling the forces of darkness or fretting over her creepy romance with a 200 year old vampire, Buffy Summers liked to head over to the Bronze to watch Sunnydale's resident high school band, Dingoes Ate My Baby. Although derided for their simplistic song structures, the band had surprising staying power, continuing on into college and only breaking up when subjected to the the classic "guitarist who's a werewolf falls in love with a rival band's lead singer who's also a werewolf" rock n' roll cliche, as seen on countless "Behind the Music" episodes. Honestly, the writers on that show could be so lazy sometimes!

Rod Torfulson's Armada featuring Herman Menderchuk, "The Kids in the Hall"

 

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Embodying the never-say-die-spirit of rock n' roll, this garage band trio steadfastly clung to their dreams of superstardom, even in the face of divine intervention. When the Rock n' Roll angel(an at-the-time-relevant, Black Crowes frontman Chris Robinson) shows them their pathetic future, slogging away in that same garage as withered, old men, they retreat back into their denial, assuring themselves that some day songs like "Trampoline Girl" will one day become arena rock anthems.

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Jesse and the Rippers, "Full House"

No matter how many times he shanghaied the Beach Boys into backing his watered down, Bryan Adams-swill music, Jesse Katsopolis just couldn't manage to hit the big time with Jesse and the Rippers. After all, the rock n' roll spirit can only survive so many Popeye impressions and heart-to-heart talks with surrogate teenage daughters. To his credit, however, Jesse did have one of the finest mullets of the '80's, if not of all time.

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The Wild Hots, "Growing Pains"

As the second season of Growing Pains neared, the suits at ABC were desperate to pull in the all-important teenage girl demographic, and Kirk Cameron just wasn't cutting it any more. The answer, in hindsight, was obvious: sling a guitar across Alan Thicke's barrel chest and have him front a band of washed-up forty-somethings. With son Mike decked out in a gigantic, pastel blue blazer and tickling the ivories, the elder Seaver belted out a strained and wholly Canadian version of Bob Seger's "Old Time Rock n' Roll". Still, that's not even close to the most embarrassing thing Kirk Cameron has ever been a part of.

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