There are no small portions, merely small men in these 3 “Man v. Food” meals that could feed an army. Adam Richman traveled the United States to find the biggest and roughest restaurant meals to attempt to defeat these roaming minions of overindulgence. With glazed expressions, sweat and massive amounts of food, this series makes you ravenous at first and then convinces you to have an apple instead.

Jack ‘n Grill’s Breakfast Burrito Seven pounds of doom utilizing twelve eggs, a ton of potatoes, one pound of ham, one entire onion, ten ounces of fresh roasted chiles and some cheese to seal the calories gets delivered to Richman’s stomach as a literal gut punch in “Man vs Food.” No menu item looks more aggressive than when it’s served in a porcelain trough like this breakfast burrito from Jack ‘n Grill. Although he waves the white napkin of shame, Richman’s surrender shows the world that Jack ‘n Grill’s Breakfast Burrito could feed an army, if not a nation of very tiny people.

The Melt Challenge The Melt Bar and Grilled throws out a huge grilled cheese that doesn’t bother pretending to care about whether your blood coagulates. With the fourteen cheese grilled cheese along with fries and coleslaw, this five pounds of dairy-backed death can feed an army and a half considering how many people are lactose intolerant. It might even be able to feed two armies if you use half of the cheese to lay traps for small mammals that could then be used as grill fodder to feed even more people. Not only could this giant “Man v. Food” meal feed an army, but it could take out opposing forces with the plentiful poison known as coleslaw.

The Italian Challenge Mick and Angelo’s eatery and bar serve lasagna, spaghetti and meatballs, chicken parmigiana, beef and ricotta stuffed cantelloni, egg-, Ricotta- and parsley-filled manicotti, sausage, garlic bread, a side salad, daily soup and an apple crisp into Richman’s eye line and the fight is on. Not content to divvy out a heart attack with just meat and pasta, they top it with cheese and sauce to make it clear that the food has come to fight you all the way down your throat. Another cringing failure by Richman on “Man v. Food” ensures that your little revolutionaries will be well fed for days.