What’s On TV Tonight: Wednesday, September 17th, 2009

Wednesday, September 23 by
An aging strongman, bored soldiers, bored housewives, and various residues. Tonight’s TV Preview contains things you might find in a Walmart.
 
CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP
 
NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!

 
BIOGRAPHY: SLYVESTER STALLONE
Network: Biography
Time: 8 – 10PM
 
Reasons to watch: The Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot star is profiled in a two-hour special. Amongst those interviewed are his wife, his brother, Bill Clinton, and Elton John. Apparently Mr. T wouldn’t return the producer’s calls.
 
NEW AGE OF WALMART
Network: CNBC
Time: 9 – 10PM
 
Reasons to watch: CNBC takes a look at Walmart’s new eco-friendly approach as well as the effects the store has on new communities. For instance, I heard the gent in the photo above was a Poet Laureate before Walmart moved into his town. Nowadays, he spends most of his time whacking tires with an old golf club.
 
JARHEAD
Network: FX
Time: 8 – 10:30PM
 
Reasons to watch: The Sam Mendes adaptation of Anthony Swofford’s Gulf War memoir stars Jake Gyllenhaal as the disenfranchised Marine. Except when Gyllenhaal is concerned, "Welcome to the Suck" takes on a whole new meaning.
 
CSI: NY
Network: CBS
Time: 10 – 11PM
 
Reasons to watch: "Hey, lookie at dis f**kin’ murder scene over hea. Looks like the vic got shot in da face. Gives new meaning to ‘bite da bullet’." ***Dramatically raises slice of pizza to mouth while music by the Who blares***
 
EASTWICK
Network: ABC
Time: 10 – 11PM
 
Reasons to watch: Hmmm, a televison show based off a movie that was released 22 years ago. That’s timely. The producers must have taken that time in order to construct a high quality show. I’m sure every scene is stitched together like a hand woven Persian rug. Or they caught the movie recently on TBS and were like, "Dude! That could be a show!!"
 
WHO’S ON LATE
 
LENO
Vince Vaughn
 
LETTERMAN
Simon Baker; Mary J. Blige performs
 
CONAN
Martin Short; Tim Gunn; Wynnona performs
 
KIMMEL
Courteney Cox; Jessica Capshaw
 
FERGUSON
Jennifer Love Hewitt; Ken Tucker; Artic Monkeys perform
 
FALLON
Amy Poehler; Dan Fogler
 
 
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