Tonight on televison, eight neglected children go on the adventure of a lifetime. And somehow nobody ends up pregnant.
CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP
NOTE: ALL TIME EASTERN & PACIFIC
Network: ABC Family
Time: 7:30 – 10PM
Reasons to watch: Tune in for the adventure but watch for your fetish of heavily-deformed manchildren. Oooo la la.
Time: 8 – 9PM
Reasons to watch: A Marine known for playing pranks is found dead on the toilet on Halloween. I’m no doctor but I rule cause of death, ink poisoning from crude penises drawn on victim’s unconscious face.
MONTY PYTHON: ALMOST THE TRUTH (THE LAWYER’S CUT)
Time: 9 – 10:30PM
Reasons to watch: Tonight’s installment chronicles the skitch troupe’s fight against censorship and the repercussions of John Cleese leaving the group. You can’t blame him for leaving to expand his horizons. When you see the opportunity to be an actor pigeon-holed to constantly play a butler, you take it.
DAY OF THE DEAD
Time: 10 – 11:30PM
Reasons to watch:
Considering that this movie slipped quietly in and out of theaters, I’m going to wager to bet this unofficial sequel to Zack Snyder
‘s Dawn of the Dead
is more rotten then the lifeless flesh it projects onscreen. It’s a zombie movie. Those guarantee box office gold. I guess the exception to that rule is the presence of Nick Cannon.
HOOKED: GONE MONSTER FISHING
Network: National Geographic
Time: 11PM – Midnight
Reasons to watch: Former President George H.W. Bush guest stars on the extreme fishing show tonight. If the line between NASCAR and politics blurs any further, we’ll all be kneeling before President Foxworthy within the next twelve years.
WHO’S ON LATE
Martha Stewart: Ludacris
Kristin Davis; Barry Sonnenfeld
Jon Hamm; Cobra Starship and Estelle perform
Edward Norton Paul
Shaffer; the Sounds perform
Ted Danson; Christopher Miller; Phil Lord
Seth Myers; Chris Paul; Landon Pigg performs