WHAT’S ON TV TONIGHT: THURSDAY, AUGUST 20th, 2009

Self-mutilation, regular mutilation, prostitutes, and Chris Rock. Tonight’s TV Preview’s just like Jerry Seinfeld’s secret party life.

CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP

NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!

THE STRANGERS
Network: HBO
Time: 8 – 9:30PM

Reasons to watch: A young couple in a remote farmhouse is terrorized by three strangers wearing masks. They have no apparent motive other than psychological torture and the desire to kill. Little known fact, the original working title for this film was The Assholes.

CHRIS ROCK: NEVER SCARED
Network: COMEDY CENTRAL
Time: 9:30 – 11PM

Reasons to watch: The zebra from Madagascar brays about the following hot-button topics: women be crazy, Tupac, Michael Jackson, and Al-Cracka.

JACKASS: WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
Network: MTV
Time: 9:30 – 10PM

Reasons to watch: Catch up with the clown princes of pain and find out what they’re up to now that the bottom has dropped out on watching dudes get their penises bit by snakes. Followed immediately by a showing of Jackass 2.5.

CATHOUSE 2: BACK IN THE SADDLE
Network: HBO
Time: 11PM – MIDNIGHT

Reasons to watch: HBO returns to the Nevada brothel to get an insider look at invite-only parties and off-the-clock employee get-togethers. Keep an eye out for members of Congress.

WHO’S ON LATE

LETTERMAN
Renee Zellweger; Gary Mule Deer

CONAN (repeat)
Jonah Hill; Cheryl Hines; Dan Naturman

KIMMEL (repeat)
Quentin Tarantino; Rachel Nichols

FERGUSON
Lisa Kudrow; James Frey; Chairlift

FALLON (repeat)
Cameron Diaz; Grizzly Bear