What’s On TV Tonight: Monday, December 7th, 2009

Andrew Jackson’s checkered past, Santa Claus‘s shady beginnings, and a potential mother-meet on How I Met Your Mother. ALL TONIGHT.

CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP

NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC

SANTA CLAUS IS COMIN’ TO TOWN
Network: ABC
Time: 8 – 9PM

Reasons to watch: This classic details Santa’s first year on the job as he rises against the evil mayor Burgermeister Meisterburger, who has outlawed all toys. It’s like Batman Begins without the kung-fu and Katie Holmes.

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER
Network: CBS
Time: 8 – 8:30PM

Reasons to watch: Ted’s friends attempt to help him get a date with JoAnna Garcia. Could she be the aforementioned mother? Otherwise they should call this episode "How I Met The Girl I Porked Before I Met Your Mother."

THE DEPARTED
Network: FX
Time: 8 – 11:30PM

Reasons to watch: What better way to watch Martin Scorsese’s tense and uber-twisty crime drama than with constant interruptions by Dave Holmes and that blonde chick?

HOARDERS
Network: A&E
Time: 10 – 11PM

Reasons to watch: A woman hoards so much junk that the floors in her house sink and rupture her gas and plumbing lines. In other words, that woman with the junk in the trunk has bad gas.

ANDREW JACKSON: GOOD, EVIL, AND THE PRESIDENCY
Network: PBS
Time: 10 – 11PM

Reasons to watch: This profile centers on Andrew Jackson’s success in battle and his overseeing of forcefully removing Native Americans from their lands. Wow. Apparently Andrew Jackson was a total dick. In protest, I urge all readers to send me their twenty dollar bills. I’ll have them disposed of properly.

WHO’S ON LATE

LENO
Susan Sarandon; Andrea Bocelli performs with the Muppets

LETTERMAN
Ray Romano; Anna Kendrick

CONAN
Howie Mandel; Deepak Chopra; Michael McDonald performs

KIMMEL (repeat)
Jake Gyllenhaal; Ashley Greene; Honor Society perform

FERGUSON
Wayne Newton; Shirley Manson

FALLON
Jason Bateman; 50 Cent