WHAT TO WATCH ON TV TONIGHT: WEDNESDAY JULY 8TH, 2009

Wednesday, July 8 by

Alright Junkies, we’re halfway through the week. You did it. You’re a champ. Why not reward yourself by relaxing by the soft, cathode flicker of your television whilst sipping the finest of boxed wines? We’ve got some pretty great suggestions for tonight but felt it necessary to point out a strange programming phenomenon that is also taking place. While combing the listings we noticed programs called "15 and Pregnant", "16 and Pregnant" and "Obese and Pregnant" are all airing at some point across three different channels. Who’s getting all these teenagers and morbidly obese women pregnant? I want an APB on Tracy Morgan immediately.

See what to watch after the jump…

 NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC!!!

BIOGRAPHY: HULK HOGAN & ANDRE THE GIANT
Network: Biography
When:
8 – 10PM

Why to Watch It: Biography has you covered tonight so get settled in and ignore the fact that you’re watching half naked men. First at 8pm, we get to see the life-story of everyone’s favorite good guy wrestler Hulk Hogan. Perhaps you’ll learn something new about the star of Santa with Muscles. And then at 9pm, we get to see the life-story of everyone’s favorite over-sized wrestler Andre the Giant. Sadly he was taken from us before ever having the chance to depict Santa.

 

I’M A MAJOR LEAGUE EATER
Network: Biography
When: 10 – 11PM

Why to Watch It: Then we get an exclusive look behind-the-scenes of another kind of champion — the competitive eater. Watch as the Horsemen of the Esophagus hit up the Big Easy for the 2009 Acme World Oyster Eating Contest. Man, I could really go for some brine right about now.

 

MONSTERQUEST
Network:
History Channel
When:
8 – 10 PM

Why to Watch It: Giant Bear Attacks and Sasquatch are the focus of these back-to-back ‘sodes. If only we could see Sasquatch fight a giant bear for real. Why hasn’t science made this happen yet?!

 

I SURVIVED A JAPANESE GAME SHOW
Network:
ABC
When:
9 – 10PM

 Why to Watch It: The video above mentions briefly that the contestants survived a monkey restaurant. That is to say, it’s a restaurant owned and operated by monkeys. Not a restaurant that serves monkey. Man, I would be the happiest guy on Earth if I could have a monkey waiter bring me some crab rangoons while I watch Sasquatch and a Giant Bear take one another on in a cage match.

 

UFC FIGHT NIGHT
Network:
Spike
When:
10PM – Midnight


Why to Watch It: Scheduled: Nate Diaz vs. Josh Neer, Clay Guida vs. Mac Danzig, Houston Alexander vs. Eric Shafer, Ed Herman vs. Alan Belcher, Sasquatch vs. Giant Bear

 

WHO’S ON LATE:

Daily Show w/ Jon Stewart (NEW): Robert Kenner, director of  Food Inc.

Conan (NEW): Meredith Vieira, Andy Hillstrand

Letterman (NEW): Queen Latifah, Emma Watson

Ferguson (NEW): Julie Chen, Michael Ian Black, Will Dailey

Colbert (NEW):  Ed Viesturs, mountain climber

Kimmel (Repeat): Dane Cook

Fallon (Repeat): Kelly Ripa, Mark Paul-Gosselaar

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