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Apocalypse Warning: ‘Jersey Shore’ Season 4 Is Coming
Tuesday, January 25 by

Jersey Shore is going to have a fourth season, and there’s nothing you or anyone else can do about it except hunker down and brace for impact.

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Links Away: Seinfeld Plots World Domination
Monday, January 24 by

I always assumed Jerry was too apathetic to make a play for global supremacy, but in the right light he could almost pass for a halfway-decent James Bond villain.

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Jay Leno To Receive Humor Award. Everything You Know Is Wrong.
Monday, January 24 by

Members of Harvard’s Hasty Pudding Club have bestowed their annual Man of the Year award to walking lowest common denominator Jay Leno.

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‘Skins’ Too Sexy For Sandwiches, Tacos, Gum, And Cars
Monday, January 24 by

Due to pressure from the Parents’ Television Association, Subway is the most recent advertiser to pull out of the racy MTV show ‘Skins’. Pun very much intended.

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Christine Woods
Monday, January 24 by

You might recognize Christine Woods as that chick from “Flash Forward” who really, really wanted to have a baby. Or did she?

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Wonder Woman Lands Her Ridiculous Invisible Plane At NBC
Friday, January 21 by

There’s a lot of lame elements to Wonder Woman, and if anyone knows about lame superhero shows, it’s NBC.

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MSNBC Pulls The Smug Plug On Keith Olbermann’s ‘Countdown’
Friday, January 21 by

Now it’ll be easier than ever to ignore the pompous commentator’s rant videos, because his show has been officially cancelled.

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Take That, NBC! CBS Greenlights Conan Pilot, ‘Vince Uncensored’
Friday, January 21 by

The next facet of Conan O’Briens slow, mafia-like revenge on NBC has gone into effect.

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Lisa Edelstein Dishes On ‘House’ Romance
Friday, January 21 by

Cuddy offers up her thoughts on dating a smart-ass misanthropic doctor with a bum leg.

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Valerie Cruz
Friday, January 21 by

Before she signed up to play a do-good doctor without borders in “Off the Map,” Valerie Cruz spent some time on the opposite end of the medical spectrum.

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Antoine Dodson Extends Already Inexplicable Career
Friday, January 21 by

Antoine Dodson, of ‘Bed Intruder’ fame(?), is the subject of a new reality TV show. Hide your networks, hide your ratings, cuz they makin’ pilots out of everrrrrrrything up in here.

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‘American Idol’ Recap: New ‘Snore’-leans
Thursday, January 20 by

While the season premiere of “American Idol” was disappointing, the second episode (New Orleans) started out strong. By “strong,” I mean it began with a gay dude named Blake Patterson playing the piano and sobbing uncontrollably.

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Links Away: Girl is Addicted to Eating Couch Cushions. Wait, What?
Thursday, January 20 by

Yeah so there’s this girl who eats couch cushions. As in she rips them up, puts the pieces in her mouth, chews, and swallows.

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‘Community’ Invites In Malcolm Jamal Warner And Levar Burton
Thursday, January 20 by

The cast offers up some juicy spoilers on the D&D episode and Shirley’s ex-husband.

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Liam Neeson Loves Money, Part 348
Thursday, January 20 by

Never one to turn down a role, the star of every other movie has returned to the Star Wars universe.

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‘American Idol’ Recap: The New Jersey Auditions
Thursday, January 20 by

I hate “American Idol.” But, I made one innocent comment about the size of my editor’s wife’s ass, and now I’m stuck on recap duty.

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Suzanne Sena
Thursday, January 20 by

When Suzanne Sena appears on the first episode of “Onion News Network” tomorrow evening, she’ll be playing a delicately-crafted caricature of herself.

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NBC Executive Of Douchebaggery Fired For Having $200K Bathroom
Wednesday, January 19 by

We want to congratulate ex-NBC Chairman Jeff Gaspin for having gigantic balls, which apparently needed a very fancy washroom to be occasionally exposed in throughout the day.

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Olivia Munn Is Single, Loves Her Fans. You Do The Math.
Wednesday, January 19 by

She’s also anti-social, so if you’re a smooth talker, you’re golden.

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Ricky Gervais Will Visit ‘The Office’
Wednesday, January 19 by

Now he’s fixing to offend Judd Apatow’s friends one by one.

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Lego Conan
Wednesday, January 19 by

That’s a lot of time to spend on a talk show host.

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Sarah Shahi
Wednesday, January 19 by

After a brief career as a beauty queen, a stint as a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, and a handful of appearances on Maxim’s Hot 100 list, it’s a good bet that Sarah Shahi is perfectly aware of her gauge-busting hotness level.

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What Will Happen On ‘American Idol’ Tonight
Wednesday, January 19 by

If I’m going to be forced to watch, I might as well make some predictions. If any of them come true, I’ll look like a genius. If not, no one will give a damn. So here’s my timeline of what you’ll see during tonight’s broadcast.

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Ryan Reynolds Gets A Girlfriend
Wednesday, January 19 by

French It Girl Nora Arnezeder has signed on to play Ryan Reynolds’s girlfriend in ‘Safe House.’ Not only that but a certain Hollywood heavyweight may join as well.

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‘Heroes’ Creator Sells ‘Mute Autistic Super-Boy’ Series To Fox
Tuesday, January 18 by

In the end, it turns out the autistic boy’s life was the collective dream of everyone on the show ‘St. Elsewhere.’

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Judd Apatow Cries About Ricky Gervais To Twitter
Tuesday, January 18 by

The helmer of such hits as ’40 Year Old Virgin’ and ‘Knocked Up’ thought Gervais was too mean and snarky to the ‘poor wittle Howwywood Cewebwities.’

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Rob Lowe Goes Postal On The Set of ‘Parks & Rec’
Tuesday, January 18 by

Rob Lowe, a late addition to the cast of NBC’s “Parks and Recreation” has just been informed that the show has been off the air for months. This angers Rob Lowe. And you wouldn’t like Rob Lowe when he’s angry.

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Regis Is No Longer Presentable To The Camera
Tuesday, January 18 by

Regis Philbin just broke your grandmother’s heart. The 7,000-year old host of “Live! With Regis And Kelly” announced on this morning’s broadcast that he will retire toward the end of the summer.

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Howard Stern Slams Jay Leno, Makes Us Nostalgic For January 2010
Monday, January 17 by

Conan O’Brien has made some kind of angry peace with Jay Leno, but Howard Stern recently Jaywalked all up in the Tonight Show host’s freakish chin.

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Neurotic Monster Larry David Invades NYC On ‘Curb’
Monday, January 17 by

Larry David is like a neurotic King Kong, and he’s coming to DESTROY the Big Apple… through loud complaints and hard-to-watch life decisions!

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