Try to Control your Spit Takes with these Hilarious Quotes From The Office

Saturday, October 8 by Helen Rogers

There’s no denying that there are some quotes from “The Office” that make you suddenly spit your drink out and keel over in laughter. “The Office” has been bringing the funny for quite a long time now, and it’s time to reminisce on some of the golden quotes from “The Office.”

“Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don’t know. I sing in the shower? Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering? Occasionally I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don’t sue me. This is opposite the point I’m trying to make.” – Michael. After accidentally plowing into Meredith with his car, Michael spends some time in the office trying to brush the entire act off as if it was no big deal. Michael Scott’s quirky humor and idiocy make this one of the best quotes from “The Office” he has ever spoken.

“I am totally gonna bang Holly. She is cute and helpful. And she really seems into me.” – Kevin. As an office prank, Holly was secretly told that Kevin suffered mental retardation, and as a result, Holly began making it a point to be overly nice and generous to Kevin. In turn, Kevin really found himself flattered with her generous acts and began pondering the possibility of her having the hots for him.

“Tomorrow I start a three month design program at the Pratt Institute in New York. I will be a little fish in the Big Apple. What up, 2-1-2!” – Pam. In “The Office,” Pam is known as being the quiet and shy receptionist that probably wasn’t given the “Most Outgoing” award in school‘ target=’_blank’>high school. However, when she decides to go to school in New York to work on her graphic design career, she makes a comment about it to the camera crew. The ending line of this quote makes it memorable because of her usual timid demeanor.

“Please don’t refer to yourself as our daddy.” – Oscar. In “The Office,” Michael Scott constantly refers to himself as “daddy,” and refers to the rest of the employees as his children. He’s the only one that finds the humor in this, and finally, Oscar makes a remark about it which turns out to be hilarious.

“Let’s see Josh replace these people. Let’s see Josh find another Stanley. You think Stanleys grow on trees? Well, they don’t. There is no Stanley tree. You think the world is crawling with Phylisses? Show me that farm with Phylisses and Kevins sprouting up all over the place ripe for the plucking. Show me that farm.” – Michael. In a tumultuous turn of events in season 2, the office caught wind of the possibility of their company branch closing down due to downsizing. While speaking on camera in his office, Michael got onto a little rant about the manager of the Dunder Mifflin headquarters, Josh. This rant was definitely one of the funniest quotes in the whole show due to the fact that Stanley, Phyliss and Kevin are actually all mediocre employees.

- Helen Rogers

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