A Hulk Hogan Sex Tape Now Exists Outside Of My Dreams, As Well

Penn Collins — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 23:09:37 +0000

The good news is that we no longer have to imagine what Hulk Hogan looks like when he’s fucking. The bad news is…WAIT! There is no bad news. Hulk Hogan has a sex tape, and everyone wins. End of story.

Unfortunately, after his divorce from Linda, Hulk went on such a bacchanalian voyage of drinking and lady-banging that he doesn’t remember any of his conquests. He claims that he didn’t sleep with any women after finding his current partner Jennifer five years ago. And you know what? I believe him. I really do.

Oh my God. I’m so excited about this that I’m…I’m…

I’m HULKING OUT!!!!!

Hogan didn’t know he was being filmed and hasn’t consented to the release, so we’ve got quite the soap opera brewing here.

A couple predictions: The “lady” is Brutus the Beefcake, and the sex tape is sensationally awesome. (TMZ)

9 Awesome Videos Of Macho Man Randy Savage

Jame Gumb — Fri, 20 May 2011 19:35:41 +0000

As you probably know, Macho Man Randy Savage died today after suffering a heart attack while driving. The news was like a punch to the gut. A fake, carefully choreographed punch, but a punch none the less. I have a lot of fond memories of the Macho Man. Actually, that’s incorrect. I think he’s awesome, but truth be told, I don’t remember why. It’s been 20 years since I watched pro wrestling.

In order to jog my memory, I went straight to Youtube, and was quickly reacquainted with my old friend. In case you’re in the same boat I’m in, here are nine awesome videos of Macho Man Randy Savage.

Good night, sweet prince.

Cocaine?

The 80′s were a crazy time, from what I remember. And if you were lucky enough to be famous back then, chances are you were not a stranger to nose candy. Was the Macho Man on drugs? I have no idea. But after watching this video, I’m certainly not going to rule it out.

More Cocaine?

So, you say Macho Man died of a heart attack? I don’t find that hard to believe. In fact, his heart probably exploded back in 1987, and it’s simpl taken this long for the adrenalin to wear off.

Cage Match Promo

From what I remember, Macho Man and Hulk Hogan were usually on pretty good terms. Obviously, at some point the relationship turned sour. In this clip, Macho teams up with Scary Sherri and Zeus (No Holds Barred, anyone?) to send Hogan a warning. I imagine Hulk pissed himself.

Insane

In this clip, the Macho Man loses his shit. But as he points out, watching another man slap your woman is bound to have that effect.

Breakdown

In this early Macho Man clip, Savage loses his shit yet again. Clearly, he hadn’t fully fleshed out his persona yet. It’s probably for the best that he dropped the crying bit from his act. It’s not very Macho.

History Beckons

History beckons the Macho Man! Well put!

Arsenio

It’s sad that we now live in a world where the words “Arsenio” and “Macho Man” have absolutely no meaning. Truly, all glory is fleeting.

Emotions

For those of you who cried when you heard the news about the Macho Man’s death, don’t be embarrassed. Even he had some confusing emotions from time to time.

Music Video

OK, maybe this isn’t as cool as Hulk Hogan’s music video. But for today, let’s just pretend it is. RIP, Macho Man!

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