Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman is pretty much the first character anyone thinks of when the subject of “women superheroes” is brought up (and honestly, has a day gone by when this subject hasn’t entered your conversation at least once?). This isn’t because she was the first female superhero, or even the best. But for whatever reason, she shook out as being the most famous, and why not? She’s got a nice patriotic thing going with her costume, and she’s also got a healthy dose of S&M with that truth lasso. Her most famous screen iteration is the ’70s TV series starring Linda Carter, but that could change if the upcoming TV … yeah, that’s probably not gonna change.

Spider-Woman

Women superheroes are often burdened by being mere reflections of their male counterparts. In this instance, Spider-Woman is obviously intended as a female Spider-Man, and there’s no point in even trying to get around it. Unlike many women superheroes, however, Spider-Woman has managed to be her own gal for quite a while, even getting her own motion comic “Spider-Woman: Agent of S.W.O.R.D.” And no, there’s no relation between her and Kiss of the Spider-Woman. That’s a different Spider-Woman.

All The Female X-Men

The X-Men series has brought possibly the most women superheroes to the screen. Jean Grey, Storm and Rogue are the most famous, but there have been several others in the series, which includes the recen X-Men: First Class. Not only do these women superheroes have to deal with the pressure of being mutants, protecting those that hate and fear them, they also have to deal with the pressures of being women! Would it be an exaggeration to say that watching the X-Men movies makes you a brave feminist crusader? No, no it would not.

The Tiger Woman

Unlike the other women superheroes on this list, it’s very possible that you’ve never even heard of The Tiger Woman. That’s probably because instead of originating in comics or on TV, The Tiger Woman comes from the lost art of the adventure serial. In a 12-chapter serial in the 1940s called The Tiger Woman, The Tiger Woman thrilled adventure-loving kids all over the country with her costume cat ears and she-Tarzan style. The Tiger Woman is not only one of the more obscure women superheroes, but she also might make a cool Halloween costume idea for your girlfriend. Run it by her, see what happens.

Batgirl

Some women superheroes are proud, upstanding symbols of female empowerment. Then again, some women superheroes are played by Alicia Silverstone in universally despised Joel Schumacher Batman movies. Batgirl was never a particularly interesting character, being basically Robin with boobs, but she is a female who wears a cape and fights crime, so she makes the list. Holy affirmative action, Batman!

Now you have at least some idea of the women superheroes that have made it to the big screen. Could all of these women superheroes hold their own against Batman, Superman, or Spider-Man? We don’t know, but we wouldn’t advise you bet against them. They’ve made it this far, after all.

“The Playboy Club” will put on rabbit ears and pretend-flirt with you. Chad Hodge’s series stars Eddie Cibrian and Amber Heard, and will explore the sexy world of 1960s Playboy bunnies. Va-va-voom or va-va-blatant”Mad Men“-rip-off? We’ll soon find out.

Is the Big Bag Wolf bad enough to mess with the police? “Grimm” is a cop drama that takes place in a world where fairy tale characters are real. This sounds an awful lot like the graphic novel series Fables, so if you like that premise, definitely read Fables, so you can complain about how much better Fables is.

Finally, I’ve been lying awake at night for years wondering when somebody would make a police procedural with a “Sliders” twist. Now it’s happening and I can finally sleep. “Awake” stars Jason Isaacs as a detective who has an accident, causing his life to split into two realities: one where his wife dies and his son lives, and the other where his wife lives but his son dies. He should just hop to the universe where the sky rains donuts. “Awake” is showrunner Wonder Woman” series was not picked up. David E. Kelley‘s invisible jet has been shot down. Hopefully, this will leave Adrianne Palicki free to wear sexier, less-outrage provoking outfits in the future. (EW)

NBC Entertainment president Robert Greenblatt has claimed that the plans of the costume designers and producers haven’t changed one bit in the face of fanboy criticism. He also claims that the outfit the fans really want to see will be unveiled sometime in the near future. Way to keep ‘em wanting more, Robert. Unveil two shitty-ish costumes that piss everyone off, then save the day with the third.

I honestly hope that wasn’t their plan all along. (TV Line)

NBC more than likely agreed with us and cowered to our influence, because they’ve revised Wonder Woman’s costume. And, um, what the hell? If we ever complain that a girl looks hot but less hot than usual, you don’t remedy this by taking away her leather pants. Well, yes. I guess removing pants altogether would work, but you should never replace leather with lycra. Unless it’s for some kind of tight top. Please print this article for handy reference.

And no offense to Ms. Palicki, whose work we thoroughly enjoy. Adrianne, call me.

P.S.: The second pic is obviously Ms. Palicki’s Teen Wolf-loving stunt double, who should also call me. (Collider)

We don’t always agree on the happenings in the entertainment community, and we like to make our beefs public. Today, NBC released an official still of Adrianne Palicki sporting the new Wonder Woman outfit, causing a nerdruption across the Internet. Does Palicki pull off the tightly-fitted ensemble, or should she add a bag of candy to mask its lameness? Writer B Hunt takes on the counterpoint in this week’s installment. Fight!

Super Heroic

Despite the staggering amount of grown men taking to the Internet to claim otherwise, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the new Wonder Woman costume. Is it stupid? Yes. Is it impractical? Yes. Is it tacky? Yes. Is it sexist? Well, if you want to be a bitch about it, yes. It’s all of those things. In other words, it’s everything a Wonder Woman costume should be!

Don’t kid yourself. Wonder Woman is a stupid character. As such, it’s fitting that she have a stupid costume. She was created in 1941, which wasn’t exactly the age of enlightenment when it comes to women’s lib. You know how women are treated on Mad Men? Well, Wonder Woman was created about 20-years before that. You can almost hear the comic writers thinking her up as an afterthought.

“Hey fellas! Isn’t it cute that women these days think they’re people? Let’s give ‘em a comic character of their own so we can sell more ads for nylons and vacuum cleaners.”

The character is also extremely generic. When it came time to give her super powers, they literally gave her all of them. She can fly like Superman, she can run like the Flash, she can talk to animals like Aquaman, and she can fight like Batman. The only thing she can’t do is piss in a campfire. It’s as if they knew they were only making one female superhero, so they had to go for broke.

Now, given that she’s a generic afterthought of a character created in a highly sexist age, doesn’t the costume make sense? It’s reminiscent of the original, but not a carbon copy. At least in this version, she’s wearing pants. It’s a lot better than what poor Lynda Carter had to work with. Have you ever tried to fight crime with your thighs exposed? Trust me, it’s hard.

And yes, the colors are gaudy, but they’re supposed to be. I’ve seen the new Captain America outfit, which is drab. It works fine for that character, but Wonder Woman is supposed to look like a glorified stripper. If they had come out with a toned down outfit, the same people would be bitching about how the designers turned their back on the character’s history.

In closing, I ask you to look at the picture. What do you see? I see giant breasts being lifted and separated. I see form-fitting pants giving a nice look at Adrianne Palicki’s dumper. I see a bunch of stupid accessories that are supposedly for crim fighting but are pretty much just hooker jewelry. In other words, I see a Wonder Woman outfit. It is what it is.

Super Heinous

Are you kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Look at that costume. There are amateur cosplay outfits that are better. And not the awesome crazy Japanese ones. I’m talking fat-white-guy-at-Comic-Con-dressed-up-like-Wolverine’s-fat-diabetic-brother-who-has-aluminum-foil-wrapped-around-cardboard-for-claws-type cosplay. This suit is like what you get when you don’t make plans for Halloween and then at the last minute your friends convince you to go to a house party because it’ll be chill and there will be all these single girls there and multiple kegs and Rob’s cousin is DJing and he’s not so bad so you go to Rite Aid at 8 PM and this piece of crap is the only thing left but at least it’s ironic and funny that you would dress up in such a cheap, horrible costume.

I don’t even know where to start. We’ll ignore her whore makeup and rat hair, since technically that’s someone else’s mistake. First, her hot pants are made out of someone’s old exercise ball and will probably only appeal to the latex pervs out there. The color is WAY off. Don’t they know everyone’s going darker these days? X-Men, Spider-man, Singer’s Superman. The light blue reads so, so poorly. Hell, even the new costume in the comic went with dark blue pants. I daresay Lynda Carter’s patriotic spanx look better.

The corset is probably the least offensive (fashion-wise) of the whole get up. At least it looks like someone took the time to tailor it (although if Adrianne so much as looks at a slice of pizza she’ll be busting seams on that thing), though it’s still made of shoddy vinyl or plastic or whatever it is. It’s also designed to give off as much glare as possible so that Wonder Woman won’t have to worry about going unnoticed. Batman is face-palming right now.

Her boots are like leftovers from some Power Rangers spin-off that wasn’t quite quality enough to bother translating to English. Her wrist bands look like trash—literally. Maybe she can take them off and string some twine between the two of them and make a soup can phones. How is she supposed to deflect bullets with a couple empty cans of Steel Reserve? And don’t get me started on the gold crest. Excuse me, did I say “gold?” I meant “cheap plastic.” And then they tacked that junk on liberally.

I understand it’s a TV show, and hence under tighter budget-restraints than the big dogs in the movie world, but you can’t have your super hero rolling around in an outfit that was made for less than a buck in some Shenzhen sweat shop. For anyone wondering how you could make someone as hot as Adrianne Palicki look terrible, well A) why would you wonder something like that and B) I think you have your answer.

However, the Wonder Woman package still makes Adrianne Palicki appear less attractive than she actually is. The cuffs, headband, and action-figure poses that come part and parcel with Wonder Woman always represent a step backwards.

To prove my point, let’s compare the photo of Adrianne Palicki as Wonder Woman with a photo of Adrianne Palicki as Adrianne Palicki.

…and Palicki as a regular hot chick:

Everyone involved with “Wonder Woman” should be thrown in jail. (i09)

“Elwes will play Henry Detmer, the acting CEO of Themyscira Industries, who is deeply devoted to Diana. He runs the day-to-day operations of the company and acts like an uncle to Diana, though he could be a possible love interest down the line.”

“A possible love interest down the line”!? No. NO. I refuse to allow for the possibility of doughy Cary Elwes making it with Wonder Woman. Or maybe instead I should take a hopeful attitude of “if he can do it, I can.” Cary Elwes: The Ron Jeremy of “Wonder Woman.” (via Deadline)

Instead, I will raise the suggestion that perhaps this casting will result in a climactic fight scene between Hurley and Adrianne Palicki that takes place in an abandoned bubble bath factory. That could work, right?  (via MovieLine)

From football siren to inviso-jet flyin’, Adrianne Palicki (Friday Night Lights) has been tapped (yeah, she has – *high fives*) to star in NBC’s “Wonder Woman” pilot. In the next paragraph, I’m gonna write about the pilot and how Wonder Woman is portrayed in the new series, but I won’t be offended if you skip to the end and look at that picture of Palicki lounging around topless. The choice is yours.

Written and produced by David E. Kelley (Boston Legal), this version of the Amazonian superheroine with the dumb lie detector lasso will require Palicki to be in phone booths constantly. She’ll play Wonder Woman, her alter ego Diana Themyscira, a billionaire CEO, and for some reason, Diana’s average-girl assistant Diana Prince. Two alter egos? And one of them is the assistant to the other? How would that– eh, you know what? I’m not gonna get into it, and instead I’ll just enjoy the picture below.

Oh man, hopefully they won’t ruin this show by adding a shitty leather jacket to her outfit. (TVLine)

As we’ve already noted, this show will take Wonder Woman completely seriously, with her lie detector lasso and invisible plane you can see the pilot inside. The show is about her busy schedule as both a crime fighter and a corporate executive, cause aren’t all women balancing busy schedules these days? Get ready to relate to Princess Diana of Themyscira, all women of the world. Or this could be yet another superhero blunder from the network that champions superhero blunders: NBC. (Collider)

“I dunno. Get McG. He’s good with women from the 70′s.”

That’s probably not how the NBC meeting to find a director for their prized “Wonder Woman” pilot went, but the result is the same. Sources close to Movieline claim that TV vet McG is the frontrunner to helm the the pilot episode of the David E. Kelley-produced reboot. While it’s not clear if McG’s involvement would extend beyond directing the pilot, I wouldn’t rule it out, as he’s got strong pedigrees in both TV action dramas and derivative cheese, of which “Wonder Woman” should have both in spades. McG has completed his transformation into the poor man’s Brett Ratner.

It seems a little odd that McG would be such a frontrunner for the NBC gig while serving as a consulting producer of ABC’s “Charlie’s Angels” remake. (I’m tired of saying “reboot.”) But if they don’t have a problem with it, then the best to both. Sadly, it would seem it’s easier in Hollywood to fight over one person with a pedigree in successful remakes than it is to put together a decent team of people to think of something new. That said, NBC might be a little strapped for cash after having to build WW’s fully-functioning invisible jet. Those things are pricey.

So it’s no surprise that NBC ultimately decided to greenlight producer David E. Kelley‘s new “Wonder Woman” show after all. However, this isn’t another campy, Lynda-Carter-sure-had-awesome-cleavage version. We’re told the show takes itself seriously, but I’m not sure how seriously I can take any superhero with bullet-deflecting bracelets. Don’t know if you’ve heard, but Superman can deflect bullets with his skin. Wonder Woman does it by accessorizing. I guess chicks need terrible superhero shows too. (ComingSoon.net)