Cast: Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Joel Edgerton, Ulrich Thomsen

Synopsis: At an Antarctica research site, the discovery of an alien craft leads to a confrontation between graduate student Kate Lloyd and scientist Dr. Sander Halvorson.

Release Date: October 14, 2011

Ellen Ripley, Alien

Perhaps the definitive lady who kicks alien ass, Ellen Ripley (as portrayed by Sigourney Weaver) killed a whole bunch of Xenomorphs throughout Alien and its 3 sequels. At one point, she “gave birth” to one right before plunging into a pit of molten metal before then coming back as a clone with a little bit of alien DNA thrown in for good measure! That’s called “implausible screenwriting–” er, I mean, “dedication.”

Buffy Summers, “Listening to Fear,” Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Sometimes, one has to go outside the specific parameters of one’s job description. For example, in this season 5 episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Buffy goes on break from vampire-slaying in order to defeat an alien who is stalking her family for reasons too complicated to get into here. The alien’s MO is to cling along its prey’s ceiling while the unlucky bastard is in bed, before dropping down on their faces and suffocating them. It’s also no slouch in the slime department. Buffy makes quick work of it, though, by carving it up with a butcher knife. Delicious!

Florence Norris, Mars Attacks!

The character of Richie’s grandmother, played by Sylvia Sidney in Mars Attacks!, proves that you don’t have to be able to walk to kick alien ass, nor do you even have to have total control over your mental faculties. All you really need to make Martian skulls explode in their space helmets is a record collection that includes the sounds of Slim Whitman. It may not be hip, but it works.

Sam, Attack the Block

In Attack the Block, the primary kicker of alien ass is Moses. But he has a reluctant ass-kicking partner in Sam, a nurse played by Jodie Whittaker. While her action against the alien invaders in the movie is less show-offy than her male counterpart, it’s no less integral to stopping the alien invasion. She also gets to shoot one of the aliens when her more-experienced-with-guns companions aren’t fast enough. She never says “bruv,” though. Maybe in the sequel.

IGN debuted a new red band trailer that has tentacles and body parts twisting every which way. Though it doesn’t seem like it comes close to touching John Carpenter‘s version with a ten-foot arm/tongue pole, at least it seems to have created some gross imagery.

1. The Fly

David Cronenberg‘s 1986 horror masterpiece drew its origins from the 1958 cult classic starring Vincent Price. Making use of (then) modern special effects techniques, the movie offers a chilling commentary about the dangers of unchecked scientific progress in a way the original never could. It also made me throw up when I was eight-years old!

2. Cape Fear

The original Cape Fear, staring Gregory Peck and Robert Mitchum, was a striking thriller for its time. But when Martin Scorsese took on the material thirty years later, he crafted a violent and chilling morality play, brutalizing the characters-and the audience-in a way early 1960′s film censorship boards would never allow. Plus, we got that awesome meme of DeNiro laughing maniacally in a movie theater, and that has only changed our world for the better.

3. Ocean’s Eleven

I don’t think I’m killing a sacred cow by saying that the original Ocean’s 11 was not a great film. It was mostly an excuse for Frank Sinatra and the Rat Pack to hang out in Vegas, get loaded, and call it a movie. But the concept was solid, and director Steven Soderbergh knocked that concept out of the park, crafting the ultimate heist movie and starting the redemption of George Clooney after the debacle that was Batman & Robin. Then the cast made Ocean’s 12, which was mostly an excuse for them to hang out in Europe, get loaded and call it a sequel. Oh well.

6 photosMary Elizabeth Winstead

Side note: why must all horror trailers end with a character holding his or her breath, hoping that a creature/killer doesn’t strike from around the corner, and then a creature/killer strikes from around the corner?

The Thing serves as a prequel to John Carpenter‘s classic and stars Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Joel Edgerton as researchers in the Artic doing battle with an otherwordly being attempting to take over the planet. Just like Justin Bieber.

Hugo from Martin Scorsese adapts Brian Selznick’s The Invention Of Hugo Cabret and tells the story of a mysterious boy living in a Paris train station. A trailer is expected this week so if you love trains, you’re going into the weekend happy.

(Coming Soon)

Those hoping to see Eric Christian Olsen’s head bitten off by a Norwegian’s open chest cavity will have to update their calendars. Universal has removed The Thing prequel from their 2011 calendar for the time being. The fifth installment in The Fast And The Furious franchise, Fast Five, is being moved up to take its place with an April 29th release. This will allow Universal to kick off their summer movie season a little earlier than planned. It also ensure Fast Five a bigger opening by pulling it out of the X-Men: First Class / Green Lantern sandwich it was originally squeezed into.

Though The Thing hasn’t found a new release date, I think this is a good thing for fans. Whether it lands in August or the Halloween season, at least filmmakers will have more time to fine-tune the film in an effort to diminish the scrutiny it is subject to from the purists. The move was mainly motivated because the gloomy tone wouldn’t play well with summer audiences. It makes sense that Universal wouldn’t want to put something sad on screens during that season, but have they never see Paul Walker act? (LA Times)

Because the threat posed by extraterrestrials can vary so greatly, we’ve compiled this list of nine aliens you don’t want to eff with. After all, throwing water on the alien from Signs is a fun way to spend an afternoon, while doing the same thing to a Xenomorph is a really bad idea.

Superman (Superman)

Because the Man of Steal likes to wrap himself in the flag, people forget that he’s not from the good ol’ U.S. of A. In fact, he’s not even from Earth. Regardless, this son of Krypton is nearly invincible, which makes him one of the last aliens you should mess with.

Alien Abductors (Fire In the Sky)

Fire in the Sky isn’t a great movie. Considering the film is about an alie abduction, there is a notable lack of alien abduction. But when the film finally deals with the topic, it makes for some terrifying scenes. The aliens look more like grotesque humans than creatures from another world, which makes them uniquely frightening. And the fact that they have no qualms about performing medical experiments without anesthesia seals the deal.

ID4 Aliens (Independence Day)

On the one hand, the aliens from Independence Day are pretty lame. After all, one punch from Will Smith will knock them out. But considering their technology allowed them to destroy every major city on the planet, we’re classifying them as “not to be messed with.”

Klingons (Star Trek: The Motion Picture)

I’ve never trusted Klingons, and I never will. I can never forgive them for the death of Kirk’s boy. These physically imposing warriors like to kick ass and take names. Take Worf, for example. Does he look like someone you should mess with? I thought not.

Optimus Prime (Transformers)

Few things are more badass than a big rig. Optimus Prime, a giant robot from another planet who disguises himself as a big rig, is defiantly one of them. While the Transformers movies might suck, this iconic character does not. Bumblebee, on the other hand, does.

The Bugs (Starship Troopers)

Nobody likes bugs. Well, almost nobody. Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs liked those moths, but I digress. In Starship Troopers, the film’s heroes are forced to deal with bugs from another planet. Oh, and they’re humongous. A can of Raid isn’t going to cut it.

The Thing (The Thing)

How do you mess with an alien if you don’t even know it’s there? This is the problem posed by the Thing, a parasitic creature that takes on the appearance of its victims. The other problem: it’s capable of assimilating the entire planet in three years, should it ever reach civilization. Best not to mess with this thing.

The Predator (Predator)

Chances are you’ll never even get the opportunity to mess with a Predator. The best you can hope for is that the Predator will choose not to mess with you. A large humanoid creature from a warrior culture Predators are known not only for their physical prowess, but also their advanced weaponry. Unless you’re a trained commando or Danny Glover, you don’t stand much of a chance against these creatures. But if you do manage to fight hard enough, you might just win their respect.

The Xenomorph (Alien)

Was there any doubt that the Xenomorph from the Alien franchise would be at the top of the list? Even the Predators have a hard time dealing with these remorseless killing machines. They’re quick, fearless, and in the right conditions, they breed like cockroaches. Unfortunately, your body could end up as part of the breeding process. Oh, and by the way, if you do manage to cut or shoot one of these things, you’ll have to worry about the acid runing through its veins. Good luck with that.

CAST: TBD

SYNOPSIS: In a remote Antarctica outpost, an alien spaceship is discovered far beneath the ice. When a group of ambitious scientists decide to thaw out one of the creatures inside, they’re in for the terrifying fight of their lives…

In an interview with MTV, Judd Apatow spills the beans that his upcoming film Funny People will include scenes and "marketing materials" for a bunch of fake movies in which Adam Sandler’s character George Simmons stars. 

It’s a conceit that worked really well in Tropic Thunder, with the inspired trailers for such high concept spoofs as Scorcher, The Fatties: Fart 2 and Satan’s Alley (all three of which you can see after the jump, along with a short list of faux-films within the world of Funny People.

Films within Funny People, all starring George Simmons (Sandler):

Mistake: a romantic comedy co-starring Elizabeth Banks

My Best Friend is a Robot: a buddy comedy co-starring Owen Wilson, which you can look for as a poster in Sandler’s character’s house. 

Redux: Judd Apatow calls this as a cross between Little Man and 17 Again, as Sandler becomes a six-month-old baby in it.

Mer-man: A male version of Splash with Sandler’s character filling Darryl Hannah‘s fins

Cinematical had a great theory that some of these fake films would become part of Funny People’s marketing campaig knowing Apatow, and if those

billboards from I Love You, Man are any indication, we’re in for a treat.

[via Cinematical]

Oh, and here are those Tropic Thunder faux-trailers we promised:

Scorcher IV Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers

Scorcher IV Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers

Satans Alley Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers