Considering that he plays the alcoholic, pansexual PIRATE Jack Sparrow in the Pirates franchise, you wouldn’t think there would be much of an issue with an actor playing another role, even one such at Paul Kemp in The Rum Diary.

I guess he’s not the fun kind of alcoholic in that film. Maybe his contract stipulates that he can only portray depraved characters if he has scarves in his hair. I have the same clause in my pre-nup with my wife, which is why I’ve gone as Steven Tyler the past nine Halloweens.