On Monday, Sylvester Stallone CLEARLY stated in an unintelligible Facebook post that, “We are preparing the film with the same passion and commitment as the previous two. We have confirmed Nicolas Cage, a master actor who gives a veneer intellectual group.” However, now Stallone tells Deadline that he “has no knowledge of Nicolas Cage joining Expendables 3.” Humnha-wha?!

What is going on with Sylvester Stallone? Just days ago he wrote in plain English a string of words that nearly made sense, only to pull the rug out from beneath us all. You can’t play with us like that, Sly. It’s bullying and it’s mean. To make up for this, I demand that an Expendables spin-off starring Nicolas Cage in multiple roles a la Adaptation. The technology exists! And if he’s not willing, can we take his face off and put it on another actor? That technology exists too!

Sylvester Stallone confirmed the news that Cage was hard up enough to join the sequel via Facebook. Warning: the following words make little sense:

“We are preparing the film with the same passion and commitment as the previous two. We have confirmed Nicolas Cage, a master actor who gives a veneer intellectual group. Hopefully we can realize to Harrison Ford, Wesley Snipes and Mickey Rourke. That is the great mission of the producer. We will continue with the same narrative scheme, the agility and the frenzy, which are inherent to the saga. What will definitely be the last? I can not guarantee. In principle it would be two deliveries, but the affection of the people encouraged us to work on a third. I guess as long as we amused ourselves by offering fun and people, we can continue playing The Expendables. For now we are not as expendable as it should and as some critics want.”

Either Sly wrote this on his iPhone. Or while high on bath salts. Or both. Or had Jet Li help him out. At any rate, his slow dissolve into Tommy Wiseau is becoming more noticeable. (JoBlo)