The new red-band trailer for LEGION hit the nets today and it looks like a winner so far.  Paul Bettany stars as a loose-cannon version of Michael the Archangel, who comes down to Earth against God’s wishes in order to ensure the savior of humanity currently incubating in his mother’s womb survives an onslaught of evil demons.  Phew. It’s like the Catholic church rewrote the script for TERMINATOR 2 and managed to keep the badassitude. 

If only the Bible had calculating-ass, glock-wielding angels and demon grandmas dropping F-bombs before tearing off people’s faces, maybe I would have stayed Catholic. Maybe after Monopoly, Candyland and Battleship, a studio can give the Bible a much needed cinematic update (with a cameo from Brendan Fraser and music by Kid Rock, of course.)

Here are your decidedly most unholy links of the day:

_{Ashley Smith Appears To Not Own A Bathing Suit (Gorillamask)}

_{How To Get A Bartender’s Attention (Holytaco)}

_{Neverending Story Van Lady Vs. Filmdrunkards (Filmdrunk)}

_{25 Funny Misspelled Tattoos (Manofest)}

_{Duck Hunter Minus The Classic Game Console (Walyou)}

_{The Worst Book To Film Adaptations Ever (Pajiba)}

_{23 Movie Plots That Could’ve Been Solved In Minutes (Cracked)}

_{Town Hall Internal Memos (Maxim)}

_{Jude Law’s Baby Mama Photo Album (Celebjihad)}

_{The Cost In US Dollars To Fall In Love (Mademan)}

_{Brock Lesnar Ruins Bud Light (Cagepotato)}

_{When Video Game Characters Turn To Acting (Unreality)}

_{How To Properly Torture An Alien (Asylum)}

_{Amanda Is America’s Hottest Community College Student (Bustedcoverage)}

_{The 15 Ugliest Soccer Players In The World (Uncoached)}

_{Rally Car Drivers Vs. Lake (Regretfulmorning)}

_{Zipline Tree Collision Prevents Man From Reproducing (Nothingtoxic)}

_{Ne Ninja Assassin Photos (Filmofilia)}