Screen Junkies » Tara Reid http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Tue, 23 Sep 2014 20:52:22 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 ‘Shark By Tara’, A Fragrance From Tara Reid http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/shark-by-tara-a-fragrance-from-tara-reid/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/shark-by-tara-a-fragrance-from-tara-reid/#comments Fri, 01 Aug 2014 16:28:18 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=263648 Tara Reid has developed a chemical she would like you to rub on your skin.

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If the words “a fragrance from Tara Reid” didn’t scare you away from this article, congratulations. Hot on the heels of her Sharknado 2 success, Tara Reid has developed a chemical that she would like women to rub on their bodies. This is even weirder than the underwear that Tommy Wiseau is hoping to sell.

Shark by Tara is a light and refreshing perfume perfect for day-to-day wear. It also incorporates a plethora of “lavender” colored flowers, which is Tara’s favorite color, making them a true fit for Shark by Tara.

Shark by Tara perfume is a complex scent with three different levels of nodes that embrace our fresh, light, and fun feel. Our top-level node is clad with iced mint, violet and lemon, while our middle node is complete with jasmine, tuberose and muguet. The last dry node is cool blue rose, amber and musk. [TaraReid.com]

Whoever the copywriter working for Tara Reid is just earned their wage. So elegant. I’ve also imagined Tara Reid smelled like coconut, cigarettes, and what one hopes is bleach. Please be bleach.

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The Six Best Kills From ‘Sharknado 2: The Second One’ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-episode/the-six-best-kills-from-sharknado-2-the-second-one/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-episode/the-six-best-kills-from-sharknado-2-the-second-one/#comments Thu, 31 Jul 2014 22:05:02 +0000 Jared Jones http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=263600 Many brave souls were lost in the worst shark-infested weather catastrophe to hit the Big Apple since The Great White(Shark)out of '84, so it is in memoriam that we pay tribute...

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By Jared Jones

Leave it to the Syfy channel to prove that the idea of a shark-filled tornado can somehow be improved upon with a second viewing.

That’s basically what Sharknado 2: The Second One was, after all — a rehash of the first Sharknado but with a buttload of celebrity cameos — from its name to its plot to its explosive finale. That is in no way is meant as an insult, mind you, as Sharknado 2 was able to accomplish what few cult hits can: create a sequel that captures the nostalgia of the original (recent as it may be) while never once winking at the camera or beating us over the head with those “Remember This?” moments that have all but served as the latter halves of Sly Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger‘s careers.

A brilliant, unexpected triumph Sharknado 2 ultimately was, featuring more brutiful deaths (gorgeously rendered in Microsoft Paint) than you could really wrap your head around in one sitting. My God, there were so many sharksecutions in this movie. Shark beheadings. Shark crushings. Death by flaming shark. The list goes on.

From Kelly Osbourne to Daymond John, many brave souls were lost in the worst shark-infested weather catastrophe to hit the Big Apple since The Great White(Shark)out of ’84, so it is in memoriam that we pay tribute to the following…

Airplane Toilet Lady

Of all the ways I thought that Airplane Toilet Lady (who I’m told is famous on Twitter or something) was going to go out, this was the only way I thought that Airplane Toilet Lady was going to go out.

Tara Reid’s(Hand)

Tara Reid‘s returning performance as April Wexler, Fin’s (Ian Ziering) on-again, off-again wife was as raspy-voiced and on four hours of sleep as ever, but watching her pick off sharks with a Air Marshal’s pistol while hanging out the door of an airplane was nothing short of visual poetry. Listening to her attempts at conveying fear and pain, on the other hand, can only be described as “like hearing a vacuum cleaner choke to death on a dust-covered tator tot.”

A scream queen the likes of Jamie Lee Curtis Reid may not be, but a gunslinger the likes of Doc Holliday? Indubitably.

Kelly Osbourne

I’m just saying, Ozzy would have caught that shark, crushed it up into a line, and snorted it.

Tiffany Shepis

Why would you choose to stand so close to the water during a sharknado? That’s like, the *worst* place to stand, dum-dum. I’m not saying Shepis deserved to have a shark nom on her face like a goddamned chew toy, but I don’t touch fire and expect not to get burned either.

I’m just starting to realize how many of the victims in Sharknado 2 are women. Let us all take to Twitter and challenge Syfy’s blatant misogyny with #YesAllSharknados hashtags.

Daymond John

Death by Lady Liberty is arguably the most noble death an American could ever experience, and it was all the more fitting that Daymond John — a guy with a true rags-to-riches story that epitomizes the American dream — met his demise in like fashion.

Or was his death by Liberty head-crushing perhaps a comment on the capitalist greed and corporate-backed impoverishment of the modern day proletariat through unjust taxation that has made the American dream all but unobtainable to those but a select few?  F*cking Sharknado, why can’t you just let me shut off my mind for 90 minutes?! WHY MUST YOU ALWAYS ASK THE TOUGH QUESTIONS?!!!

Flaming Shark Bystanders

I take that back, Death by Flaming Shark is definitely the most American way to go out. (*salutes, single tear rolls down eye*)

BONUS: The Sharks!!

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO DEFEND THIS COUNTRY, PRESIDENT OBAMA?!! BECAUSE MATT LAUER JUST HARPOONED A F*CKING SHARK WITH AN UMBRELLA.

Any notable deaths we missed? Give us a shout in the comments section. 

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‘Sharknado 2′ Trailer Jumps The Shark In A Good Way http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/sharknado-2-trailer-jumps-the-shark-in-a-good-way/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/sharknado-2-trailer-jumps-the-shark-in-a-good-way/#comments Wed, 09 Jul 2014 16:43:52 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=262763 Even the sharknados are tougher in New York.

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If you were worried that Sharknado 2: The Second One couldn’t be more ridiculous than its predecessor, this trailer is here to call you a dummy. First of all, the cast now includes Ian Ziering as the intrepid hero, Tara Reid as whoever she plays, Vivica A. Fox, Billy Ray Cyrus, Sugar Ray’s Mark McGrath, and Jared from Subway. If that’s not more ridiculous enough for you, direct your attention to the comically-oversized chainsaw that Ziering wields this time around. I bet you didn’t even know those existed. Dummy.

And to reiterate:

 

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A Sharknado Couldn’t Actually Happen http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/a-sharknado-couldnt-actually-happen/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/a-sharknado-couldnt-actually-happen/#comments Mon, 15 Jul 2013 19:03:14 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=255787 We don't have the science yet.

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For anyone living near the coast planning to relocate their family to middle America in order to protect them from sharknadoes, don’t call the moving company just yet. Today comes new evidence that the weather phenomena known as a sharknado couldn’t actually happen. From Accuweather:

A tornado would not have the ability to sweep up marine life. Traditionally, a tornado is formed over land where a similar formation over water would be known as a waterspout. Understandably, “Shark-Spout” doesn’t have quite the same ring to it.

Greg Skomal, a Shark Specialist at the Massachusetts Marine Fisheries, also shoots down the “Sharknado” plot by explaining that: “The concept that sharks cannot only survive being swept up in a tornado but also attack humans is absurd.”

Thank God that our God is not a cruel god.

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Act Surprised That Tara Reid Is In A Movie Called ‘Sharknado’ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/act-surprised-that-tara-reid-is-in-a-movie-called-sharknado/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/act-surprised-that-tara-reid-is-in-a-movie-called-sharknado/#comments Tue, 09 Jul 2013 17:18:56 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=255680 What on Earth could this film be about?

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Between earthquakes, hurricanes, tsunamis, and torrential floods, the last thing country needs is another natural disaster. Nonetheless, we welcome the most harrowing vehicle of destruction back into our lives – Tara Reid.

Also, there’s something called a sharknado, which I’m pretty sure is a drink at TGI Fridays.

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9 Idiotic Celebrity Quotes About September 11th http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/9-idiotic-celebrity-quotes-about-september-11th/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/9-idiotic-celebrity-quotes-about-september-11th/#comments Wed, 18 Jan 2012 22:52:02 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=242876 Thanks for weighing in, idiots.

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We all know that Mark Wahlberg is very, very tough. We know this because he won’t stop telling us. In fact, if he had been on Flight 11 on 9/11, there would not have been a 9/11. It’s true! According to Mark Wahlberg (who didn’t offer to enlist in the military and fight the forces of Al Qaeda).

He has since apologized, but the Invincible star came under fire today for this quote:

“If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did,” Wahlberg said. “There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, ‘OK, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry.”

There still would have been a Planet of the Apes remake though. He can’t prevent every tragedy, you guys.

In honor of this incredibly insensitive claim, we’ve rounded up 11 more dumb and selfish things celebrities said about 9/11. Thanks for sharing!

Marion Cotillard

“We see other towers of the same kind being hit by planes. Are they burned? There was a tower, I believe it was in Spain, which burnt for 24 hours. It never collapsed. None of these towers collapsed. And there [in New York], in a few minutes, the whole thing collapsed.”

“It was a money-sucker because they were finished, it seems to me, by 1973, and to re-cable all that, to bring up-to-date all the technology and everything, it was a lot more expensive, that work, than destroying them.”

Marion Cotillard believes it was just easier to hijack three planes, attack The Pentagon, and get the President involved than to hire to contractors to re-cable the World Trade Center.

Lee Ryan of Blue

“What about whales? They are ignoring animals that are more important. Animals need saving and that’s more important. This New York thing is being blown out of proportion. Who gives a f**k about New York when elephants are being killed. I’m not afraid to say this, it has to be said. I’m not afraid to say it and that’s why I’m the outspoken one from the band.”

Thank God someone so important is thinking of the whales.

Rachel Uchitel

“I believe Andy was meant to die because he was too good. I’m almost happy it ended the way it did because I’ve learned so many lessons from him. It would have been tragic if we got into fights and then divorced. I would be a fat housewife with three kids in Sands Point, LI.”

On her fiance’s death in the World Trade Center. She maintains she was misquoted.

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Hollywood’s Top 10 Best Bad Girls http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/hollywood%e2%80%99s-top-10-best-bad-girls/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/hollywood%e2%80%99s-top-10-best-bad-girls/#comments Mon, 17 Oct 2011 13:00:47 +0000 Joseph Gibson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=231132 The few, the proud.

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Bad Teacher is coming out on DVD this Tuesday (October 18th). What better way to observe this momentous occasion than to run down some other Hollywood bad girls? As bad as Cameron Diaz is in Bad Teacher, she can’t compete with the real deal. Take a look at Hollywood’s 10 best bad girls.

Enter your birthday below to see an exclusive clip from Bad Teacher.

Winona Ryder

Many Hollywood bad girls get involved in garden variety pursuits like drug or alcohol abuse. But Winona Ryder did something that, in its own way, is even worse: shoplifting! When a millionaire movie star is stealing clothes just for the thrill of the crime, you know she’s stolen a seat at the Hollywood Bad Girl Hall of Fame.

Madonna

Unlike many bad girls in Hollywood, Madonna is a shrewd professional in all aspects of her career. Rather than going out of her mind, partying, stealing boyfriends, etc., she pretends to do all of those things, and more, as part of her public persona. But have you ever seen her do “Like A Virgin”? If she’s not a Hollywood bad girl, than nobody is.

Lindsay Lohan

One of the definitive Hollywood bad girls, Lindsay Lohan took the enormous promise she showed as a young child actress and squandered it on sex, drugs, and alcohol. Ain’t that always how it goes? She may be in line for a comeback, though, so don’t rule her out just yet. If her adult performance in Robert Altman’s A Prairie Home Companion is any indication, she still has talent to spare.

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Nancy Grace’s Nipple And 8 Other Unwanted Nude Celebrities http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/nancy-graces-nipple-and-8-other-unwanted-nude-celebrities/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/nancy-graces-nipple-and-8-other-unwanted-nude-celebrities/#comments Tue, 27 Sep 2011 22:13:02 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=230269 My spank bank needs a bailout.

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Nancy Grace is vehemently denying we saw her nude nipple on the last episode of Dancing with the Stars. God, I never thought I’d be eager to agree with Nancy Grace, but here we are. Rather than give you just the one heinous photo of what could possibly be Nancy Grace’s nipple, we decided to go whole hog and convey how much we actually dislike our readers by giving them eight more unsavory upskirt, nip slips, and wardrobe malfunctions.  It’s a sex videos nightmare. Ugh.

Articles like this are every writer’s dream. Smell that shit? That’s Pulitzer.

9. Nancy Grace

It looks like 2012 came a little early. How is she denying that there is a nipple under that pink star? If there’s no nipple under there, then the real story is that Nancy Grace lacks nipples, which is something I have suspected for a few years now.

8. Tara Reid

Hey Tara. Nice boob job. No, I can’t see the scar. Also, did you get your breasts shined? Terrific.

7. Amy Winehouse

Is this creepier because Amy Winehouse is dead or because she looked like this when she was alive.

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9 Women In Hollywood Who Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Vote http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/9-women-in-hollywood-who-shouldnt-be-allowed-vote/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/9-women-in-hollywood-who-shouldnt-be-allowed-vote/#comments Fri, 26 Aug 2011 20:51:44 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=226104 In honor of the 91st birthday of the 19th Amendment...

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While you probably didn’t get the day off from work, you may have heard that 91 years ago, the 19th Amendment was put into effect, giving women the right to vote. Though it feels somewhat barbaric that women haven’t had this right for even a century, nonetheless, today is, for many, a celebration of progress and equality.

However, as the word “equality” would indicate, the floodgates to vote were opened to all women, much as they are to all men, regardless of their ability to make an informed decision about any mundane detail, let alone who the nation’s leader should be. So while there is no question that there are millions of men who would be just as at home on a list like this, there are also millions of women. However, since I don’t feel like writing this article for the next 20 years, I’ve dropped the number to nine and limited the scope to actresses.

Some people just aren’t fit to govern themselves.

9. Tara Reid


We are all really excited about the Big Lebowski sequel that Reid has up her sleeve. Even though neither Coen brother, nor any of the original cast members were aware of such a sequel, she took the liberty of announcing it to the world while outside of a charity event earlier this year.

When she’s not imagining her own sequels, she can also be found absently staring off into space or exposing her breasts on red carpets. But she’s got a soft side, too. Just ask her dog Stoli. Seriously. She named an animal “Stoli.”

8. Paris Hilton

Criss Angel? She definitely would have voted Nader.

The 26th amendment dropped the voting age from 21 to 18, effective in 1971. However, this threshold only considers actual age, and not emotional or intellectual age. If either of those were factors, not only would Paris Hilton not be voting, but she’d probably be running around in Jolly Jumper, wetting her Huggies.

Ironically enough, she was a champion of the “Vote or Die” voting campaign in 2004. Easy choice. “Die,” Paris.

7. Suzanne Somers


When she’s not appearing on late night talk shows stoned out of her gourd, she’s taking her precious moments of clarity to share pearls of wisdom such as “chemotherapy drugs really killed Patrick Swayze.” Don’t expect to get rid of her anytime soon, though, as her newest compulsion has bee fighting aging.

She wages this battle by injecting her vagina (you can go ahead and make your own joke here; I’m tired) with various drugs, and taking a literal bucketful of supplements and vitamins. I wasn’t thrilled that Michael Jackson had the right to vote, and it’s pretty clear that Ms. Thighmaster is quickly on the same course as the King of Pop.

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‘American Reunion’ To Make Your Next Spring Break More Mediocre http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/american-reunion-to-make-your-next-spring-break-more-mediocre/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/american-reunion-to-make-your-next-spring-break-more-mediocre/#comments Tue, 26 Apr 2011 06:04:42 +0000 Geoffrey Golden http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=209066 Here's the 'American Reunion' release date, so you know when to avoid the latest 'American Pie' movie.

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After the phenomenal success of Scream 4, I’m sure you’re all excited to see another best-in-the-90′s franchise return to the box office. Here’s the info on American Reunion‘s release date, so you know when to avoid the latest American Pie movie. No, this one’s not going straight to DVD.

Stiffler, band camps and pie sexing will all be back in theaters April 6, 2012. The first three were Summer releases, which makes me wonder if Universal thinks this pie will be tasty enough for blockbusterdom. However, on a high note (that’s gonna be a pun – wait for it), the film is being written and directed by Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg of “Harold and Kumar” fame. (Note the word “high” earlier.)

The cast include a veritable who’s-who of actors who have nothing better going on, including Jason Biggs, Seann William Scott, Chris Klein, and American Pie All-Star Check Collector Eugene Levy. Other Pie alums are playing hard-to-get, but will almost certainly acquiesce, like Tara Reid and Mena Suvari. (TheWrap)

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The Coens Psyched To See Tara Reid’s ‘Big Lebowski’ Sequel http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/the-coen-brothers-are-fans-of-tara-reids-work/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/the-coen-brothers-are-fans-of-tara-reids-work/#comments Thu, 03 Feb 2011 21:44:41 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=24589 The other day when Tara Reid was saying things, just about every person on Earth who is not Tara Reid wisely dismissed it. However, there are two people who were not so quick to dismiss the project. The Coen Brothers!

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The other day when Tara Reid was saying things about a Big Lebowski sequel, just about every person on Earth who is not Tara Reid wisely dismissed it. However, there are two people who were not so quick to dismiss the project. The Coen Brothers!

No. They’re not developing a sequel but they’d love to see one. When asked about Reid’s announcement, Ethan commented, “I’m glad she’s working on it.” When asked if the project were actually being developed, he responded, “Well, we don’t but we’ll watch it when it comes out.”

Joel then added, “Especially if Tara’s in it.”

Huh. I wouldn’t peg them as fans of Senior Skip Day. To each their own, I suppose. (via The Playlist)

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‘Lebowski 2′ Revelation Comes From World’s Worst Source: Tara Reid http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/lebowski-2-revelation-comes-from-worlds-worst-source-tara-reid/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/lebowski-2-revelation-comes-from-worlds-worst-source-tara-reid/#comments Mon, 31 Jan 2011 20:36:21 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=Video&p=23527 There's going to be The Big Lebowki 2! (says Tara Reid). It's going to start filming this year! (says Tara Reid).

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Breaking news coming from the mouth of Tara Reid is a bit of a mixed blessing. On the one hand, if she says something newsworthy, you have to report it, but on the other hand, it’s Tara Reid, so whatever she says is probably more the result of a chemically-induced haze than it is one of her weekend getaways in reality. So take this news with a whole underground mine full of salt.

There’s going to be The Big Lebowki 2! (says Tara Reid). It’s going to start filming this year! (says Tara Reid). Does Tara Reid know something that we don’t? After wading through 60 seconds of rambling (the Lebowski comment is at 1:00 or so), it’s pretty clear, that no, Ms. Reid doesn’t know anything we don’t. Nor does she know a lot of the things that we do.

Unfortunately, upon Reid’s stating her intention of filming Lebowski 2 this year, the faceless reporter balks and instead follows up on her statement that she will also be working on American Pie 4 this year. So, no real clarity there, though we can all scoot to the edge of our seats for American Pie 4: Jason Biggs‘ Death Rattle early next year.

A cursory search for any news or developments that would corroborate Ms. Reid’s statement turned up nothing aside from the typical fanboy wishful thinking. It is possible though that the project is a closely-guarded secret, and Reid just screwed up and let the cat out of the bag. That I would believe.(FilmDrunk)

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