George Lucas must have lost a lot of credits betting on pod races over the weekend, because he's hard at work trying to scrounge up some quick cash. And there's no easier way for the man to make money than re-releasing Star Wars yet again, this time in 3D.
Actually, there is better way: he can re-release all six Star Wars films in 3D in 2012. After all, the Battle of Yavin will look cool in 3D, but Jar Jar Binks stepping in sh*t will be out of this world! (Empire Online)
But watch for X-Wings before you step off the curb.
Ewok it out with these links.
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I prefer this version. It's less talky and John Williams's score on piano sounds quite foreboding.
Here are today's silent links.
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The midget ones are kinda creepy, but damn if they can't shake it.
Get funky with these links.
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I know I'm not alone in citing The Empire Strikes Back as my favorite Star Wars film. It built upon the mythos presented in the original and expanded the universe in very cool ways and played up the darker tones without transparently trying to sell more toys. And it didn't include Ewoks. Gary Kurtz was George Lucas's partner for the first two films in the saga, and now he's speaking out for the first time about what makes the series suck now. Namely, it's Lucas's greed and desire to sell more toys. Beam me up (or something) LA Times!
"I could see where things were headed. The toy business began to drive the [Lucasfilm] empire. It's a shame. They make three times as much on toys as they do on films. It's natural to make decisions that protect the toy business but that's not the best thing for making quality films…. The first film and ‘Empire’ were about story and character, but I could see that George’s priorities were changing. The emphasis on the toys, it's like the cart driving the horse."
Oh snap! Equestrian BURN.
“We had an outline [for the third film] and George changed everything in it. Instead of bittersweet and poignant he wanted a euphoric ending with everybody happy. The original idea was that they would recover [the kidnapped] Han Solo in the early part of the story and that he would then die in the middle part of the film in a raid on an Imperial base. George then decided he didn’t want any of the principals killed. By that time there were really big toy sales and that was a reason.”
That totally almost explains Jabba's faaaabulous uncle, Ziro the Hutt.
He's truly entered the Dark Side.
The age-old question of what if Arnold Schwarzenegger did the voice of Darth Vader in Star Wars instead of James Earl Jones has finally been answered. I can't wait until George Lucas re-releases all six films with this new, more appropriate dubbing.
Check out the video after the jump…
George Lucas excludes Samuel L. Jackson from snack time on the set of Attack of the Clones.
There's trouble a-brewin' in Nerdville. It seems the long awaited live-action "Star Wars" television show is on hold indefinitely, according to Star Wars creator and destroyer George "Big Baby Jesus" Lucas. In an interview with Digital Spy, the director cited cost as the main factor.
“They literally are Star Wars, only we’re going to have to try to do them [at] a tenth the cost… And it’s a huge challenge, [a] lot bigger than what we thought it was gonna be.”
Considering the first movie, which is beloved by all, was filmed using motion control photography and a bunch of crappy models, and the first prequel, which is hated by all, had an unlimited special effects budget, maybe George is putting too much emphasis on the bells and whistles.
Just make the damn show, and for the love of Yoda, let someone else write and direct. (Screen Rant)
A bank teller in Long Island was surprised yesterday morning when approached by a gun-toting Darth Vader. The Sith Lord forced the teller to empty their drawer before fleeing.
We all heard the stories of Lucasfilm banning the original Darth David Prowse from Star Wars events, but who would have dreamed he'd resort to this? Of course, I joke. This is obviously another stunt from Improv Everywhere. Give it up, guys. You can only run for so long. (Newsday)
Last time we saw Improv Everywhere, they were chasing down ghosts in the New York Public Library. Now the comedy troupe known for its wacky movie reenactments brings the Princess Leia/Darth Vader scene from Star Wars down into the dingy underground of Manhattan. I can't wait until the day the locals turn against these theater jokesters. Improv's going to be all over the sidewalk, brickwalls, and tip of a bum's chicken bone knife. EVERYWHERE. (Ed note: Please don't murder these guys. Okay, thanks.)
Check out the video below.
Wicked Lasers designed a blue laser called the Spyder III Pro Arctic that looks an awful lot like a lightsaber. It has the ability to kill people, and LucasFilm has a problem with that. Even the warning on the product itself basically says not to turn the thing on: Warning: Extremely dangerous is an understatement to the power of 1W of laser power. It will blind permanently and instantly and set fire quickly to skin and other body parts, use with extreme caution and only when using the included eye protection. Customers will be required to completely read and agree to our Class IV Laser Hazard Acknowledgment Form. It doesn't get more metal than setting fire to skin and other body parts. Do they mean body parts not covered by skin? What kind of creature is handling these miracles of modern science? Apparently those pussies at LucasFilm can't handle the shear awesomeness of death lasers: It has come to our attention that a company called Wicked Lasers is selling a highly dangerous product out of Hong Kong that is designed to look like a lightsaber from Star Wars. This product is not licensed or approved by Lucasfilm in any way. We have demanded that Wicked Lasers immediately cease and desist their infringing activities. As Wicked Lasers itself admits, this product can cause serious injury to the user and other people. We strongly discourage consumers from purchasing it. I guess I get it. Someone sells a product that resembles a cherished icon from your landmark films, and said product sets some kid on fire, you might wind up with egg on your face. But it's awesome blue egg that emits a 445nm ultra high power 1W beam which appears up to 4000% brighter than the Sonar's 405nm violet beam! Check out video of the Spyder III after the jump…
If you've ever wondered what it would be like to have an AT-AT for a pet, look no further than this short film, AT-AT Day Afternoon. Like we all suspected, they poop Jabbas. (FilmDrunk)These links want your affection.'Twilight: Eclipse' Photoshop Contest (HolyTaco) Why Do I Keep Watching: 'Entourage' (TVSquad) Hot Girls Tell You The Time On Japanese Mobile App (Asylum) Susan Saradon To Film Ping-Pong Reality Show (PopEater) Mentos & Diet Coke Revive Dead, French Clown (FilmDrunk) The Sexiest Eyes In Hollywood (Unreality) 100 Best Free Porn Sites (BroBible) This Gymnasitcs Freakout Is A Must See (TotalProSports) 6 Ways To Ruin A Home Shopping Segment (Maxim) Rematch In Russia Rocky Balboa-Style (CagePotato) Mel Gibson's Knuckle Punch Drunk-Love(CelebJihad) Bad Fashions We Should All Stop Wearing (Smosh) Part 'Zodiac', Part 'Pi' Movie Trailer (Pajiba) Luke Trips And Dies (Atom) Datamancer's Stylish New Keyboards (MadeMan)
Snoop Dogg wields his lizzle sizzle. Adidas wants you to buy their Star Wars Originals collection, so LucasFilm made this two minute commercial that doesn't feature shoes. It stars Snoop Dogg, Daft Punk, David Beckham, Jay Baruchel, Ciara, and others in the Cantina Scene from Star Wars. My only question is, why do the patrons give the black guy trouble? If they're racist, which they clearly are, they should have known the brother would be packin' heat. Check out the spot after the jump.
I trust your meterological news implicitly.
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Thirty-five years ago, this article's headline would have made absolutely no sense. Today, it has the power to send millions of nerds into a frenzy. TomTom has released a Darth Vader voice for their GPS system (a.k.a. nav computer). For just $13, the Sith Lord can guide you anywhere you need to go. Unfortunately, most Star Wars fans already know the way to their parents' basement, so the application is virtually useless. In addition to Vader, the voices of C-3PO, Yoda, and Han Solo are all slated to be released this summer. That's all fine and good, but I long for the day when I can type my address into my TomTom and hear the soothing voice of Jar Jar Binks tell me, "Wessa Goin' Home!" (Collider) Check out Darth Vader's TomTom recording session after the jump.
Jedi drunk with power. There should be an aptitude test administered before such a title is granted. And I'm not talking about the physical abilities section. I'm talkin' Scantron, analogies, that crap. Otherwise you're going to graduate a slew of Jedi who pretend their lightsabers are dicks. (BuzzFeed)May these links be with you. Career Watch: Gerard Butler (Moviefone)How You Search for Boobs (Asylum)Heidi Montag's Surgery Obsession (PopEater)25 Awesome Motorcycle Helmets (HolyTaco)'Groundhog Day' Reimagined as a Crappy Rom-Com (FilmDrunk)15 Awesome Cyborg Animals (Unreality)When Bobsledding and Skateboarding Collide (TotalProSports)10 Best Donuts in America (Maxim)Daley Serves Koscheck at Pre-Fight Press Conference (CagePotato)Rihanna Butt Pics Collection (CelebJihad)15 Most Bizarre College Courses (Smosh)Blockbusters, Leading Actors, Undressed (Pajiba)10 Indie Awesome Comedies You Missed (MadeMan)NASCAR Skydiver Crashes (AllLeftTurns)20 Sexy Latinas (RegretfulMorning)
Princess Leia Bikini Car Wash – Watch more Funny VideosMay cause heart palpitations, nausea, and even death in some nerds. Watch with extreme caution, and a Darth Vader mask on. (FilmDrunk)
Star Wars Uncut: A New Hope is a fanmade tribute movie that stitches together hundreds of fifteen-second Star Wars reenactments to create one feature-length nerd orgasm. It has everything in…
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Because this turned out so well. An official sanction from LucasFilms has made it okay to laugh at Star Wars. Not the films though. You must remain stone-faced while Hayden Christiansen delivers dialogue and when rubber puppets pop up during the pod race. That is law. What you can laugh at is a new animated series being developed by LucasFilms themselves to presumably cash in on the recent franchise-skewering made popular by "Robot Chicken" and "Family Guy." And the best way to do that is to hire Seth Green and Matthew Seinreich from "Robot Chicken." I posit, however, that the best way to ensure hilarity is to farm it out to France. (Variety)
Still waiting for this to hit the big screen.Today's links are ready now for your viewing pleasure. Actors Who Have Played Identical Twins (Moviefone)Is Porn Good for Society? (Asylum)James Franco is Smarter Than You (PopEater)25 Hot Spring Break Girls (HolyTaco)An E-Trade Baby Movie? You're Sh*tting Me. (FilmDrunk)12 Acapella Versions of Your Favorite Themes (Unreality)Hot Bikini Girls Mud Wrestling (TotalProSports)21 Monkeys Being Awesome (Maxim)Stupid Baby Tricks (Smosh)Huge Collection of Jennifer Aniston's Rump (CelebJihad)Gambling Addiction Enabler: UFC Fight Night 21 (CagePotato)160 Greatest Schwarzenegger Quotes (Pajiba)3D Cooking Show (Atom)Building Your Man Garage (MadeMan)Hamlin Enjoys Some Goody's Pain Relief (AllLeftTurns)7 Ways to Still Use Your Small Penis (RegretfulMorning)
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Darth Vaders Winter Vacation – Watch more Funny VideosYou'd think a Lord would do better with the ladies. Darth Vader's attempt to bag some tail while on vacation proves fruitless, and quite honestly, uber depressing for someone with such a sweet breathing apparatus. Don't drink and dial, Vader. No one wins at that game. (EgoTV)
This little German girl can identify Han Solo using only her tongue. Somewhere in the universe Princess Leia is seething. Don't put these links in your mouth.iPod Nano 'Green Zone' Giveaway! (Moviefone)March Madness Bracketology (Asylum)Heidi Montag Fires Spencer, Hires Psychic (PopEater)Hot Gamer Chicks (HolyTaco)Corey Feldman Auditions for Cry Baby (FilmDrunk)100 Greatest Jewish Movie Moments (Heeb)15 Pokemon Brought to Life (Unreality)Mascot Eats ESPN's Michelle Beadle (TotalProSports)Hot Pics of Alice Eve (Maxim)7 Ways to Hook Up with a Leprechaun (Smosh)Emma Watson Shows Her Thighs to the Paparazzi (CelebJihad)Rachelle Leah to Return as Guest Octagon Girl (CagePotato)10 Most Anticipated Films of SXSW (Pajiba)Unicorns! (Atom)15 Things to Never Do with Your Girl (MadeMan)What Happens to All the Lug Nuts? (AllLeftTurns)7 of the Luckiest Men in America (RegretfulMorning)
RedandJonny are a nice, young married couple who just happen to wear Stormtrooper helmets and document their adventures. You can check out their Flickr account here, but I've picked 25 of my favorite shots.
Lara Croft and Slave Leia Snowball Fight – Watch more Funny VideosApparently I need to go to Sundance next year. Forget the films and the free swag, Lara Croft and Princess Leia are throwing snow at each other! What two actresses of that caliber are doing in a completely random duel is beyond me, but Angelina totally pwns Carrie. I guess now we know where tomb raiders stand among members of royalty. Quick, to the presses! There are history books that need sexy revisions! (BuzzFeed)
Lightsaber Flashmob – Watch more Funny VideosA lightsaber fight consisting of over 100 Star Wars fans who wish they were Jedis instead of salesmen/students/humans erupted at a shopping mall in Bristol, England this past weekend. No one was injured, but the potent smell of virginity will be thick in the air for weeks. (/Film)