It's off-putting how harmoniously "Star Trek" and Ke$ha's "Tik Tok" sync together. Stop doing these things, Internet! Stop it now!Try not to hum along as you peruse these links.5 'Futurama' Characters That Should Get Their Own Spin-Off (TVSquad) Giant 31-Inch Mustache Wins U.S. Title (Asylum) Oh Sookie! Anna Paquin And Her Sexuality (PopEater) Steven Segal Beats Up A Mannequin (FilmDrunk) MILF Monday: Randi Ingerman (HolyTaco) Alright Arnold, Put That Doll DOWN!!! (Unreality) Ball Kicking Pictures of 'Footballer Wives' (BroBible) Anti-Rape Condom To Be Tested During World Cup (TotalProSports) Ico: Jack White (Maxim) TUF 11 Finale Ends In A Bloody Mess (CagePotato) Robert Pattinson Turns His Back On Twilight Fans (CelebJihad) Two-Sentence Movie Reviews: Toy Story & More (Smosh) Michael Shannon: A Little Bit Dirty, A Little Bit Pretty Too (Pajiba) Barats & Bereta Edition (Atom) Sustainable Style (MadeMan)
Yesterday, Queen Elizabeth II knighted Patrick Stewart, which means we all have to call him Sir now. Pffffft. I'm supposed to call Bono "Sir" but you don't see that happening, do you? Hey, Streets With No Names, get your Irish ass over here and refill my Guinness!If you could so kindly click on these proper links. Sam Mendes to Direct 'On Chesil Beach'? (Moviefone)Female Bankers Who Should Be Fired for Hotness (Asylum)Zack Morris and Wife Split (PopEater)Gwyneth Paltrow Wants to Show You Her Taco (FilmDrunk)25 Sexy Pics of NBA Finals Dancers (HolyTaco)If TV and Movie Characters Ran a College (Unreality)10 Ways to Get Drunk for Free in NYC (BroBible)Asshole Rockers From Movies (Maxim)7 Most Triumphant Losses in MMA History (CagePotato)Exclusive Picture of Gary Coleman's Coffin (CelebJihad)21 Crazy Church Signs (Smosh)Determining Your Level of Degeneracy (Pajiba)Jockey Stud (Atom)Dream Job: Bomb Squad (MadeMan)How to Get Serviced Without a Girl (RegretfulMorning)
"I'm out this bitch."Leonard Nimoy won't be ordering additional prints of his headshot. The Star Trek star has decided to hang up his pointy ears and goatee that he wears when he plays a villian and retire from acting after sixty years.“I want to get off the stage. Also, I don’t think it would be fair to Zachary Quinto. He’s a terrific actor, he looks the part, and it’s time to give him some space. And I’m very flattered the character will continue. [Before all this] I was away from acting for 12 years, so I guess I was seducable. But since J.J. Abrams revived the Star Trek franchise, I felt I owed him something. And I’m glad I did it because he promised me a good story, and it was.”He's also retiring from the convention scene, with only a few more appearances planned. So if you have any important questions or theories about pon farr negation or want to point out continuity errors in the original series, your time to pester Mr. Nimoy is running out. (Toronto Sun)
William Shatner offers an evocative and erotic description as to why Captain James T. Kirk wants to climb a mountain, all backed by a catchy beat. As an actor, Shatner delves into the psyche of his character, and apparently he has discovered that Kirk likes to f*ck gigantic rock formations. It's probably all a metaphor or something. Check out Shatner's process below.
Whether Mr. J.J. Abrams likes it or not, Zoe Saldana refuses to keep her pretty little mouth shut about the Star Trek sequel, unofficially titled Star Trek: Uhura's Quest for Spock's Nuts. Yay for all of us! She said Abrams, Alex Kurtzman, and Roberto Orci are all still working on the script, and that they'll probably be going into pre-production around this time next year.It's just pre-production, people. That means they'll start making drawings of how they want the shiny sets and costumes to look. Then once they decide how many whatevers should hang from the whatever, they have to make those whatevers a reality. Someone will probably get injured during construction, which will cause a delay, and during that time J.J. will realize there's a huge plot hole in the script. I expect to see the Star Trek sequel in 2015. (MTV)
Paramount Home Entertainment put on a huge bash at L.A.'s Griffith Observatory to celebrate the release of Star Trek on DVD and Blu-ray and Screen Junkies caught up with J.J. Abrams on the black carpet. When asked if he would return for another impossible mission with Tom Cruise, Abrams indicated that he will serve as producer but has another film he's helming that will interfere with him directing another Mission: Impossible.“The one I’m directing hopefully next year, I’m just in the early stages of that or middle of that, which is probably going to preclude my availability for doing Mission,” Abrams said. “Although I so love what the script is, what the story is. Josh Appelbaum and Andre Nemec are writing a script and they’re doing an amazing job so I’m already sort of envious of whoever ends up directing that movie.”Don't feel too bad J.J.. I'm sure there are people out there that are jealous of Felicity. Somewhere.
Why? Why, why, why, why?! JJ Abrams, you had a chance to put the amazingly buxom Diora Baird in a tastefully revealing bra and panties and you decided to NOT put Diora Baird in said lingerie. Do you need to replace the lenses in those stylish black frames of yours? The woman is a ten and you decided to go with a woman who is not Diora Baird:For shaaaaaaaame. Chris Pine and Diora might have had amazing chemistry, but now we'll never know because a robot could have played the role below. Hmmmm a robot Diora Baird… Now there's something that shouldn't have creeped into my imagination. [Topless Robot]
Television's ultimate pitchman has passed away. Billy Mays, the charismatic and clamorous infomercial host died in his sleep after sustaining a head injury during a rough plane landing this past weekend. The very likeable Mays is currently co-starring with Anthony Sullivan on the Discovery Channel show Pitchmen. This really is such a shame. It's always sad to see someone cut down while their star is on the rise. His contributions to the tapestry of television will be sorely missed. (Variety)And on a side note, can we please put a stop to all of these recent high profile deaths? Keyboard Cat's paws are gonna fall off at this rate.Here are some other morning headlines… GI Joe's newest character poster: Scarlett. (Film School Rejects)Warner Bros announces their Comic Con line-up. (/Film)Picard and Sisco look-a-likes to open Star Trek restaurant. (io9)80's Movie Montages That Make No Damn Sense. (Cracked)Michael Bay to Megan Fox: I made you. (The Playlist)
Geekologie reports that a man in South Wales recently passed away and used the opportunity to honor his favorite show, Dr. Who. Sebastian Neale arranged for his funeral to be themed after the popular science fiction program, right down to the TARDIS-shaped coffin.This is the most bizarre thing I've ever seen. Oh wait, I stand corrected. What are your thoughts on this, Talkative Baby?Yeah. I totally agree.More morning news for all y'all…Shia Labeouf will not bring down Y: The Last Man adaptation. (Coming Soon)It Might Get Loud gets a trailer. (The Playlist) Which lovely lady should play Judy Jetson? (io9)Tim Burton's 9 has a new poster. (IMP)Sexy Jamie King to play sexy Brigitte Bardot. (CHUD)
According to Nikki Finke's Deadline Hollywood Daily, Paramount's Star Trek pulled in $26 million on saturday, a 9% increase from Friday's box office. The studio is reportedly confident that the totals for the film, including the Thursday night previews, will reach $75 million. Not quite as big as X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but one would have to think Star Trek's gonna outlast its mutant rival if the reviews mean anything. In any case, it's another success for JJ Abrams to celebrate. In tribute to Mr. Abrams, here's a video from the Fine Brothers that posits what would happen if Trek met Lost. See the rest of the weekend Box Office Estimates after the jump:
Here's the last Star Trek starlet to get you prepped for Abrams's sexed up reboot, if you haven't seen it three times already. Our featured girl's roles have gotten smaller and smaller each day, and we're ending on a girl who's character is basically the equivalent of an Original Series red shirt, minus the expendable part. Yes, it's siren Rachel Nichols as "Gaila," the green Star Fleet Cadet! Where You've Seen Her Before: Rachel's familiar with Abrams and company, having guest starred on the fifth (and final) season of "Alias" as CIA Agent Rachel Gibson. She also showed up in the remake of The Amityville Horror, in Charlie Wilson's War as one of "Charlie's Angels," and in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, which you have secretly seen and enjoyed on a lonely saturday night. You're going to be seeing a lot more of Rachel this summer, as she's also starring as Scarlett in G.I. JOE: The Rise of Cobra.Random Quote: "I am smarter than you, and I am better looking, and I have an accomplished career, and I’m not even thirty."Well then. See how accomplished Rachel is in these racy photos after the jump.
Star Trek officially opens tonight and Mother's Day is Sunday. How appropriate, then, that we introduce you to Jennifer Morrison, who plays Winona Kirk, the mother of Capt. James Tiberius Kirk, in JJ Abrams' film. There are several different backstories associated with the character, but no matter what reality you buy into as a Trekker, you can't deny Jennifer's practically playing the mother of god. Where you've seen her before: She's probably most familiar as Dr. Allison from Fox's "House" series, but she's also played Jamie in Grind, Amy in Urban Legends: Final Cut, and Chris in a small 2004 film called Mall Cop, whose makers probably hate their lives right now.Random Quote: "My resume for Cameron has me graduating medical school the year I graduated junior high.”See pictures of Jennifer after the jump:
“Star Trek” has been lying on the emergency room table for a good 10 years now, finally flat-lining with the ultra-flop “Nemesis” back in 2003, and then being confirmed dead when the pitiable TV series “Enterprise” was cancelled in 2005. After having overcome cancellation, diminishing box office returns, and an increasingly maligned mythology only taken seriously by hardcore fanboys, “Star Trek” looked like it had finally breathed its last Enter JJ Abrams, who has retooled, rebooted, and re-energized this franchise into a slick, hip, action-packed and character-driven summer blockbuster that will bring in much-needed new fans and please plenty of hard-to-satisfy Trekkies. The hardcore fans won’t be happy, but then again, are they ever?
Okay okay, maybe the term "starlet" doesn't apply to Winona Ryder, given that she's consistently worked in the biz since 1988's Beetlejuice. But with Abrams' new movie, Winona's career is going to get a reboot, just like Star Trek itself. So it's like a reincarnated starlet. Who is Winona in Trek? In the film, Winona plays Amanda Grayson, Spock's human mom. The character has appeared four times prior to this new installment, including the "Journey to Babel" episode in the Original Series, and in the films, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, and Star Trek V: The Final Frontier. If you're the first person to name the episode of the Trek cartoon series in which Amanda appears, WE HAVE A STAR TREK T-SHIRT FOR YOU. (Just email our feedback_@_screenjunkies.com address) Fun fact: her marriage to Spock's Dad, Sarek, is widely considered to be the first Vulcan-Human interracial marriage. Space fevah!Character Quote: "Logic! Logic! I'm sick to death of logic! Do you want to know what I think about your logic?"It would only be logical of you to check out the photos of Winona after the jump:
The reviews are rolling in for JJ Abrams' Star Trek reboot, and they're glowing like a phaser set to "kill." And boy, does Abrams knows how to cast killer lady actors. For the rest of this week, Screenjunkies will be singling out a Star Trek starlet each day and giving you a few tidbits of their career history before opening night. Set loins to "aroused."Today's girl is Zoe Saldana, who plays Uhura in the film. Where you've seen her: As Anamaria in Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, as Dolores Torres in The Terminal, and as Angie Jones in Vantage Point. She'll also be in the film version of the second coming of Jesus, James Cameron's Avatar. Pointless Quote: “You need 100% commitment; you have to be willing to wake up every morning knowing you're going to practice eight hours straight.”See the photos of Zoe after the jump: