Written by Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris won best original screenplay for the story of a young, blocked writer searching to understand love in an unromantic time. The Descendants won best adapted screenplay and stars George Clooney as a man trying to bring his family together after finding out his hospitalized wife has cheated on him. It was written by Alexander Payne, the Dean from Community and the guy who delivered the “hair pie” line in Broken Lizard‘s Club Dread.

Winning these honors helps both films in the race for Oscar gold, because the guild members who voted here are also the old white dudes who comprise the Academy. Though it should be noted that Oscars odds-on favorite, The Artist, wasn’t eligible for a WGA Award as it was written by French writers and didn’t really feature any dialogue.

That said, the Oscars could go to anyone at this point. Fingers crossed for The Descendants. How awesome would it be to see Hair Pie’s acceptance speech? (GMA)

The full list of winners are…

SCREEN WINNERS

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Midnight in Paris, Written by Woody Allen; Sony Pictures Classics

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
The Descendants, Screenplay by Alexander Payne and Nat Faxon & Jim Rash; Based on the novel by Kaui Hart Hemmings; Fox Searchlight

DOCUMENTARY SCREENPLAY
Better This World, Written by Katie Galloway & Kelly Duane de la Vega; Loteria Films

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TELEVISION WINNERS

DRAMA SERIES
Breaking Bad, Written by Sam Catlin, Vince Gilligan, Peter Gould, Gennifer Hutchison, George Mastras, Thomas Schnauz, Moira Walley-Beckett; AMC

COMEDY SERIES
Modern Family, Written by Cindy Chupack, Paul Corrigan, Abraham Higginbotham, Ben Karlin, Elaine Ko, Carol Leifer, Steven Levitan, Christopher Lloyd, Dan O’Shannon, Jeffrey Richman, Brad Walsh, Ilana Wernick, Bill Wrubel, Danny Zuker; ABC

NEW SERIES
Homeland, Written by Henry Bromell, Alexander Cary, Alex Gansa, Howard Gordon, Chip Johannessen, Gideon Raff, Meredith Stiehm; Showtime

EPISODIC DRAMA – *TIE*
“Box Cutter” (Breaking Bad), Written by Vince Gilligan; AMC

“The Good Soldier” (Homeland), Written by Henry Bromell; Showtime

EPISODIC COMEDY
“Caught in the Act” (Modern Family), Written by Steven Levitan & Jeffrey Richman; ABC

LONG FORM – ORIGINAL
Cinema Verite, Written by David Seltzer; HBO

LONG FORM – ADAPTED
Too Big to Fail, Written by Peter Gould, Based on the book written by Andrew Ross Sorkin; HBO

ANIMATION
“Homer the Father” (The Simpsons), Written by Joel H. Cohen; Fox

COMEDY / VARIETY – (INCLUDING TALK) SERIES
The Colbert Report, Writers: Michael Brumm, Stephen Colbert, Rich Dahm, Paul Dinello, Eric Drysdale, Rob Dubbin, Glenn Eichler, Dan Guterman, Peter Gwinn, Jay Katsir, Barry Julien, Frank Lesser, Opus Moreschi, Tom Purcell, Meredith Scardino, Scott Sherman, Max Werner; Comedy Central

COMEDY / VARIETY – MUSIC, AWARDS, TRIBUTES – SPECIALS
After the Academy Awards, Head Writers: Gary Greenberg, Molly McNearney; Writers: Tony Barbieri, Jonathan Bines, John N. Huss, Sal Iacono, Eric Immerman, Jimmy Kimmel, Jonathan Kimmel, Jacob Lentz, Danny Ricker, Richard G. Rosner; ABC

DAYTIME DRAMA
General Hospital, Written by Meg Bennett, Nathan Fissell, David Goldschmid, Robert Guza, Jr., Karen Harris, Elizabeth Korte, Mary Sue Price, Michele Val Jean, Susan Wald, Tracey Thomson; ABC

CHILDREN’S EPISODIC & SPECIALS
“Hero of the Shadows” (Supah Ninjas), Written by Leo Chu, Eric S. Garcia; Nickelodeon

Dead men tell no tales

Pirates of the Caribbean 4 has not come out yet, but Disney is already planning the sequels. That makes sense, because the movies have grossed an assload of booty at $2.68 billion worldwide. Development is starting on Pirates of the Caribbean 5, which will be filmed simultaneously with Pirates of the Caribbean 6 and maybe Pirates of the Caribbean 7: Curse of the Treasure of the Incredible Box Office Tallies! However, the series is losing one of the two writers who has been at the helm of every film since the beginning.

Disney made a deal with Pirates writer Terry Rossio (Shrek), but not his longtime collabo-writer Ted Elliott (also Shrek). We don’t know yet why he decided to voluntarily walk the plank, but our guess is the novelty of watching Johnny Depp do a gay Keith Richards impression wears off after about… oh, I don’t know, a decade. (TheWrap)

They’ll start reading the pages and pages of dialogue that they already saw in the movie, get bored around page 23 and log into the actual social network, where they’ll write on their Facebook wall about how great the screenplay is. When their quote unquote screenwriter friends see these posts, the cycle will repeat itself for a few sad days. Meanwhile, all their quirky dramedy spec scripts will spend yet another day unfinished.

And some asshole blogger will point that out and will feel kinda bad, but not really. (Deadline)