So, without further adieu, here are some of Science Fiction‘s most beloved Santa’s, most of whom will destroy the sh*t out of you rather than giving you presents. Enjoy!

NASA seems confident that the risks to human life are extremely small. However, if movies have taught me anything it is that satellites can be extremely dangerous. They can be used to cripple world economies, spy on Will Smith, and even raise the dead. So, please enjoy your last moments on Earth with these 5 movie satellites that could kill us all.

Scoop VII – The Andromeda Strain

The Andromeda Strain points out the inherent dangerous side effect of sending something into space. Namely, Space Rabies. When the Scoop VII satellite crashes into a New Mexico town, it brings a deadly virus with it referred to as The Andromeda Strain. Great. I’m worried enough about Earth viruses. Am I going to have to worry about alien ones now too?

Unnamed Satellite – Night Of The Living Dead

Okay. If the idea of a space virus sounds far-fetched, how about the much more realistic possibility of harmful radiation from space? Could happen, right? In the case of Night of the Living Dead, harmful radiation from a downed satellite causes the Earth’s dead to rise from their graves and begin eating the living. Which I really hope can’t happen and doesn’t happen this weekend. I have plans to go see the Descendents.

SkyLab – Wet Hot American Summer

A piece of NASA’s SkyLab (the original space junk) threatens the campers at Camp Firewood. Luckily, an astrophysics associate professor from the local college is on the scene and shows the campers how to build a device that will protect them from certain doom. However, it’s unclear whether or not SkyLab returned with any space viruses that raise the dead. But I kinda hope it did. That would be an awesome sequel.

Don’t worry, Screen Junkies is here to help. Below you will find a BINGO card labeled with the sights you’re sure to encounter at this year’s event. Print it out, and cross off the items as you spot them. First one to make a horizontal, vertical, or diagonal line wins (none of that four corner B.S., please). Enjoy.

If you like sketch comedy and sci-fi, you were probably a virgin until at least your early 20′s. But the enjoyment you’ll get out of Thomas Lennon’s new show “Alabama” will more than make up for all those lonely nights.

Billed as a cross between “Reno 911!” and”Battlestar Galactica,” the show, which is currently in development for FX, follows the exploits of the USS Alabama on its seven year intergalactic peacekeeping mission. It will take place one-thousand years in the future, and will feature sci-fi staples such as cyborgs, puppet-based aliens, and, of course, your occasional time paradox.

“It’s Reno 911! with occasionally like we pass through a nebula that causes everyone on the ship to hear each other’s thoughts.  Sometimes we run into ourselves as babies and then we have to keep the baby version of our-self alive so the future version of us can be there at the time.  You know, sci-fi problems. Reno 911!/sci-fi problems on a very, very sweaty, sweaty, clunky spaceship.”

Filming of the pilot is slated to begin in late September (Collider)