By the way, if you came here by Google search for the word “manhunt,” you might be a little disappointed. But don’t fret. You’ll find Mr. Right someday. In the meantime, why don’t you check out these seven great films?

With apologies to the movie Manhunt. Despite the title, it just wasn’t manhunty enough.

Zero Dark Thirty

“The story of history’s greatest manhunt for the world’s most dangerous man,” didn’t get that reputation by adapting Where’s Waldo? for the big screen. Based on historical events, the drama lifted the curtain to take audiences inside the real life hunt for Osama bin Laden. Jessica Chastain stars as the tenacious, young CIA officer who has spent her brief career trying to locate Public Enemy #1. It is due to her fight and resolve that the Al-Qaeda leader was tracked down and eventually killed. Director Kathryn Bigelow proved once again that she has the golden touch.

The Fugitive

The Fugitive is perhaps the most famous manhunt film. Based off the popular television series, Harrison Ford stars as a doctor on the run after being framed and convicted for the murder of his wife. Tommy Lee Jones also stars as the gruff US Marshal Sam Gerard, who is hired to track Ford’s Dr. Richard Kimble down. However, as Kimble alludes Gerard, he’s able to gather clues about the identity of his wife’s true killer and eventually team up with his pursuer to bring about justice. Jones all but steals the show and American audiences have loved his fleshy under eyes ever since.

Silence Of The Lambs

To catch a killer, you need to think like a killer. This is the reasoning that lead the FBI to accidentally release Dr. Hannibal Lecter from his cage. The former psychiatrist turned cannibal is the only one with the insight to track down a killer known as “Buffalo Bill.” When Bill kidnaps the daughter or a U.S. Senator for use in a “woman suit” he’s trying to fashion from the skin of his victims, Starling must not only track down the killer but also unlock the mind of Hannibal Lecter.

Seven

Let the games begin. Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman star as two detectives, one a new transfer and the other on the verge of retiring. The pair are assigned to bring in a killer who has meticulously planned his kills, each of which represents one of the seven deadly sins. With five victims accounted for, the detectives track down the killer only to find that it was all part of his plan. The final two victims are closer to home than either of the men imagine. The film cemented Kevin Spacey as an actor to watch. And we’ve also been loving his fleshy under eyes ever since.

The Bourne Supremacy

Former CIA assassin Jason Bourne is on the run once again. Framed for crimes he did not commit, the agent alludes his former bosses all while his mind continues clearing of psychogenic amnesia. Once again, Bourne proves that he’s too well-trained and remains several steps ahead of the agency. Using this advantage, Bourne races to figure out the details of who framed him while searching for details about his former life.

No Country for Old Men

Josh Brolin plays a good-ish man who makes a bad choice. After happening upon a drug deal gone wrong (the type where dogs are shot), he discovers a bag stuffed with $2 million. Problems arise when he returns to the scene to aid a dying man. After being spotted, Brolin’s Llewelyn Moss goes on the wrong with Javier Bardem‘s psychopathic hitman on his tail. Of course, any good manhunt movie worth its salt also includes Tommy Lee Jones (see: The Fugitive; U.S. Marshals; The Hunted) and his under eyes. Jones plays a sheriff trying to find Moss before the wrong people do, which is no easy feat since the film is filled with the wrong people.

Public Enemies

Michael Mann‘s crime film focuses on the last years of famed bank robber John Dillinger. Johnny Depp plays the charismatic gun man while Christian Bale stars as the FBI Agent on his heels. A series of gunfights, prison breaks, and more robberies lead to the eventual end of Dillinger, a infamous character brought to life by Depp’s underrated performance.

This just proves that Out for Justice really was a film ahead of its time.

But don’t let that make you think the coveted role of Osama Bin Laden has fallen into unworthy hands: In addition to the natural resemblance, Sekhon has reportedly lost more than 25 pounds to get his frame into the Bin Laden range of about 165 pounds. Interestingly, despite the recent report that Sekhon will be Bin Laden in the movie, he has reportedly already finished all his work on the film, but says he’s “on quite a big non-disclosure agreement” that keeps him from discussing his role further.

He’s joining a pretty impressive ensemble cast, which includes Chris Pratt, Kyle Chandler, Jessica Chastain, Mark Strong, and many more. I can’t wait to see how he pulls off the beard! (The Playlist)

Then again, considering Islamic extremists would like to kill anyone who doesn’t read the Quran or beat their multiple wives, we shouldn’t be all that surprised. Even so, we felt bad for Dave. So, to show our support for the father of the “Top Ten List,” we’ve whipped up “The Top Ten Reasons Islamic Extremists Want David Letterman Killed.” Allahu Akbar!

(Check Out 5 Celebrities Who Were Targeted By Islamic Extremists…Besides David Letterman)

10. Did not think that “Uma/Allah, Allah/Uma” bit at the Oscars was funny….AT ALL.

9. Long-running feud with Biff, the stage manager. Honestly, it’s way too long to get into here.

8. They never forgave Dave for his rude remarks about Sarah Palin‘s daughter.

7. Letterman’s longtime involvement with IndyCar Racing won him a lot of enemies within the traditionally Nascar-centric world of Al-Qaeda.

6. Thought it was Allah telling them to take out the late-night talk-show host, but it was actually their friend Craig messing with them while they were stoned.

5. Think the gimmick of a top 10 list is trite and played out. (Editor’s note: Shit.)

4. Have been watching Letterman for 6 years and still haven’t seen that masturbating bear everyone always talks about.

3. Tuned in to find out that night’s show was the fat kid from Modern Family, Khloe Kardashian and Lady Antebellum. You’d be pissed, too.

2. Jay Leno is a longtime supporter of Islamic terrorism. It’s the worst-kept secret in Hollywood.

1. Seriously. They’re just dicks.

What we don’t know: Disney’s plans for the patent.

What I assume is going on: Either the House of Mouse is gonna make an animated musical about a group of talking circus seals who decide to hunt down Osama Bin Pigeon, a live action re-imagining of the Seal Team 6 story called Herbie Hunts al-Qaeda, or they’re revamping “Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride” to take place in Pakistan. Possibly all three. Stay tuned… (MediaBistro)

You might vaguely remember hearing about one or two projects in the works detailing the hunt for Number One Terrorist Guy Osama bin Laden. Now, after last night’s news that Osama’s star power in Hollywood has increased significantly, the question over how these projects are going to be handled in up in the air.

The most recent project is the black ops thriller tentatively titled Kill Bin Laden from The Hurt Locker director Kathryn Bigelow. It’s been stalling, but now that there’s a pre-packaged “happy ending” to the story, maybe Kill Bin Laden will get fast-tracked, perhaps under the new title Killed Bin Laden.

The other movie is a project based on the book Jawbreaker, about “the December 2001 American-led military mission to hunt and kill Bin Laden right during the opening stages of the 9/11-prompted invasion of Afghanistan that the author as the CIA pointman had helped coordinate with Special Operations Forces.” Oliver Stone was reportedly interested in it, but it never gained much traction – it’s safe to say that’s about to change.

Anyway, both of these movies’ stocks have probably increased significantly in light of bin Laden’s death. Stay tuned for any official announcement about these projects, or any other new bin Laden-related movies. Perhaps in an announcement from the White House at 11:30 PM. (Deadline)

The documentary is tentatively titled Killing bin Laden, the title of which harkens back to a similar documentary, Killing Pablo, which was based on the enduring manhunt for drug kingpin Pablo Escobar as documented in a book by Mark Bowden.

Dicovery Channel president and GM Clark Bunting said, “We want to bring as much added context and in-depth historical insight to the story as we can.”

The film will air Sunday, May 15th at 10 PM EST. Wave an American flag while you watch it. (Vulture)

Air Force One

Being forced to sit through this Harrison Ford stinker would constitute torture in most of the Western world. But the ridiculous plot and the over-the-top American patriotism would surely hit Osama extra hard.

Navy Seals

Given that bin Laden was killed by a team of Navy Seals, forcing him to watch this shit fest seems fitting. And the fact that Charlie Sheen is in it is the icing on the cake. Even people living in Pakistan are sick of hearing about that guy.

Ishtar

Ishtar, starring Warren Beatty and Dustin Hoffman, is widely considered one of the biggest box-office flops of all time. Critical response wasn’t much better. Given the Middle-Eastern setting of the film, it’s a perfect fit for this list.

Yentl

Jews? Check. Empowered female? Check. Cross-dressing? Check. More Jews? Check. Barbra Streisand? Check. Yep, when it comes to torturing a Muslim extremist, this movie has it all.

Brokeback Mountain

Islamic extremists aren’t big fans of homosexuals. So a film about two gay cowboys is a nice addition to Osama’s new DVD collection. Extra points if he’s forced to watch while getting raped by demons.

Pearl Harbor

Any Michael Bay film would be right at home on this list. His entire filmography belongs in hell. But because of the patriotic subject matter, we chose Pearl Harbor. The actual World War II attack was only slightly more tragic than this awful film.

Team America: World Police

Unlike most of the other films on this list, Team America is awesome. But something tells us the humor will be lost on Osama.

True Lies

True Lies represents everything an Arnold Schwarzenegger film should be. Plus, it has Tom Arnold. As you know, Islamic extremists hate Tom Arnold.

Delta Force

Part of me thinks that the last thing Osama bin Laden saw before he died was Chuck Norris‘ smiling face. While that’s probably not true, the idea of bin Laden being forced to watch Delta Force on repeat for all eternity doesn’t seem that far fetched.

Honorable Mention: Season Two of”24“

Even though it’s a television show, we couldn’t leave Jack Bauer off this list. And given its plot line involving Middle-Eastern terrorists, season two of “24” should be mandatory viewing for Osama.

UPDATE: Variety is now reporting that the narrative concerns black ops and is based on a true story that has appeared in printed form. The pic does not, as previously indicated, directly revolve around Osama bin Laden.

Kathryn Bigelow (The Hurt Locker) might have Public Enemy Number One in her sights for her next project. No, she isn’t working on a Cat Stevens biopic with Osama bin Laden – the as-yet-untitled low-budget black ops thriller that’s been reported on earlier might center around efforts to nab Osama.

This isn’t the only project on Bigelow’s plate, though. She’s also working on Triple Frontier, which is set to begin shooting sometime this year. The jury’s out on which of these projects is actually going to be released first. Since the black-ops bin Laden movie is reportedly a small, low-budget affair, it might get banged out before the larger Triple Frontier, or it might be serving as a tentative back-up plan in case the bigger project falls through or is delayed. Either way, a movie about the hunt for Osama bin Laden is sure to be controversial, although in the case of war movies like The Hurt Locker, controversy doesn’t always translate to box office success. The prospect of seeing Sam Worthington or somebody spit out a witty one-liner before shooting Osama in the face might be enough to break some box office records, though. Free suggestion re: one-liner – “Where you’re going, you won’t have Been Laid In a very long time!” Send my residual checks to Screen Junkies. (SlashFilm)