All of these people overpaid for a bad movie and their dumb little glasses.
Movie Tickets More Expensive Than Ever, While Movie Quality Hits All-Time Low
Tuesday, August 7 by

“Four for ‘Hotel for Dogs 2: Concierge’s Revenge’, please.”

Pictured: A representation of definite lungs.
Hooray For Hollywood!: ‘Possible Lungs’ Found On Street In South LA
Monday, June 11 by

They may or may not have been inside a person for purposes of breathing.

Wow. She's...she's very...very handsome.
Hooray For Hollywood: Musician Arrested For Trying To Run Over Park Ranger
Monday, February 6 by

It’s about time people started trying to run over well-meaning park workers. They’ve had it too good for too long.

Don't let that long hair near your kid!
Fox News Exposes The Great Muppet Caper: Brain Washing Your Children
Monday, December 5 by

“The only thing green that should be up on that screen should be Kermit the Frog.”

This is the real Patch Adams, and if someone looking like this ever reached out to give me medical care, they would pull back a bloody stump.
The Best ‘Patch Adams’-Related Home Invasion Story You’ll Read All Day
Thursday, December 1 by

Reminds me of the time I used the Catherine Zeta-Jones film ‘No Reservations’ to diffuse a race riot.

So long, Andy...
Andy Rooney’s Forgotten Film Reviews
Wednesday, September 28 by

“The last movie I saw in a theater was Cocoon, with Wilford Brimley.”

Next stop, Teddy T's!
Denver Film Enthusiasts Re-enact ‘Weekend At Bernie’s’ With Friends’ Corpse
Friday, September 16 by

It’s unclear who got to be Andrew McCarthy.

Nancy-Grace-In-Front-Of-Various-Phallic-Devices-Per-Usual
7 Movie Rednecks Nancy Grace Would Love To Exploit
Tuesday, August 30 by

If only these stories actually happened, Nancy would have no time for DWTS…

Fun With Hurricane Irene
Friday, August 26 by

Is that a tropical storm in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

WHAT’S ON TV TONIGHT: WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 12th 2009
Wednesday, August 12 by

Blindfolds, bickering, shackles, mounds of snow, and serious daddy issues. All things you might find in Pamela Anderson's bedroom. Your TV preview begins now!CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!

HULU WILL STREAM MICHAEL JACKSON’S MEMORIAL SERVICE TODAY
Tuesday, July 7 by

Today beginning at 9:30 a.m. PST, 12:30 p.m. EST Hulu will live stream Michael Jackson's Memorial Service. Stevie Wonder, Al Sharpton, Brooke Shields, Smokey Robinson, Berry Gordy, Kobe Bryant, Magic Johnson, and John Mayer amongst others will be appearing as eulogizers. I only hope that Mayer knows this is the wrong venue to try out his stand-up material. [via The Business Insider]Morning headlines that won't cause epic gridlock… Zach Galifianakis plots his takeover of Hollywood. (Reuters) Baywatch is getting the big screen treatment. (First Showing) Lost loses its best writer. (NY Mag) Sly talks The Expendables. (Latino Review) A Christmas Carol poster is SMOKIN'! (Cinema Blend) Is Michael Jackson's ghost haunting Neverland Ranch? (Dread Central)

DAVID CARRADINE FOUND DEAD IN BANGKOK
Thursday, June 4 by

The U.S. Embassy has confirmed the death of Kung Fu and Kill Bill star David Carradine. The 72 year old actor was discovered early Thursday morning in his Bangkok hotel room. Currently there are conflicting reports concerning the cause of death. Screen Junkies would like to offer our sincere condolences to all of David's loved ones.Less depressing morning news…Eminem was implicit! (Cinema Blend) Bruno put a lady in a wheelchair. (Reuters) Short Circuit remake grabs a Robot Chicken scribe. (Empire) Prison Break's T-Bag joins Heroes. (THR) Winona Ryder is totes cray-cray. (The Playlist)

TRUE BLOOD LAUNCHES VAMPIRE GOSSIP SITE
Friday, May 29 by

The marketing for HBO's True Blood has always had a cool way of re-imagining popular culture with a vampiric twist. For instance, their beverage billboards from last summer that blurred the line between faux and legit. Now in honor of the show's upcoming second season, they've launched BloodCopy.com; a website that sinks its teeth into juicy vampire gossip. It's like Gawker but less evil.Look at these other morning tidbits…The Final Destination poster is pretty sweet. (UGO)The Hangover 2 is not yet guaranteed. (The Playlist)$70 Zombie Movie looks like it cost at least $80. (io9)Land Of The Lost pics. (Cinema Blend)Behind the scenes of Halloween 2, the newest one. (Dread Central)