Take a look for yourself at this week’s DVD Rundown!

New Releases

Soul Surfer	Rio	Eastbound and Down (S:2)	United States of Tera (S:3)

Ferris Buller’s Day Off	Better Off Dead	Sleepers	Conan the Barbarian

Conan the Destroyer	Tracy Morgan: Black and Blue	MST3K vs. Gamera	Everwood (S:4)

But my mediocre existence fits right in with the mediocre crop of new DVD’s being released today. I hope you like Source Code and Todd Solondz, otherwise, you’re going to have to settle for a trip in the way-back machine to a time when Animal House and Blues Brothers were still fresh and new. See for yourself in this week’s DVD Rundown!

New Releases

Source Code	Life During Wartime	Trust	Dylan Dog

Animal House	Blues Brothers	Dante’s Peak	Jersey Shore (S:3)

I hope you like concert videos, because this week, we’ve got a ton of them. We’ve also got a Matthew McConaughey movie, a talking lizard, and robot chicken. With so many options to choose from, you’d be a fool not to waste your money on a format that will probably obsolete within the next few years. With that in mind, here’s this week’s DVD Rundown!

New Releases

Lincoln Lawyer	My Dog Tulip	Insidious	Brother Justice
Brazil	Miral	Arthur (7/15)	Rango (7/15)

Television

Entourage (S:7)	Damages (S:3)	Robot Chicken (S:3)	ER (S:15)

Concert

Foreigner: Live	Rage Against the Machine: Live at the Grand Olympic	Foo Fighters: Back and Forth	Megadeth: That One Night

So, what’s playing this weekend?

Horrible Bosses

There's Funny Stuff In 'Horrible Bosses' Red Band

With a Rotten Tomatoes score of 76%, you can walk in feeling fairly confident that Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis, and Charlie Day will deliver a fair amount of laughs.

Best Review

Worst Review

Look at how crazy is the craziness we are doing for you. Isn’t it crazy? the movie shouts, and the more it does, the less you’ll laugh.

Kyle Smith – New York Post

Our Recommendation

If you’re a fan of the actors, and like a dark comedy that doesn’t get so dark you feel uncomfortable, then give Horrible Bosses a shot. Jennifer Aniston also has a real whorish mouth in it. She’s come a long way since Friends.

The zookeeper

Trailer For Kevin James’ ‘The Zookeeper’: Nothing Matters Anymore

Judging by the 13% it’s currently receiving on Rotten Tomatoes, you should avoid this movie like Kevin James should avoid trans fats. And yes, I know fat jokes are easy, but that doesn’t make them any less funny.

Best Review

James is appealing enough to make it work – just barely.

Chris Hewitt – St Paul Pioneer Press

Worst Review

Offensive to women, men, children, parents, WASPs, Asians, African-Americans, animals and zookeepers … a movie with no conceivable audience.

Steven D. Greydanus – Decent Films Guide

Our Recommendation

If your kid desires to see this one, drop him or her off at the theater with a crisp $10 bill, make your way over to the nearest strip club for their extensive buffet, and return ninety minutes later not feeling like you want to end your life.

The Ward

‘The Ward’ Trailer Might Hurt A Little

The film’s rating of 33% on Rotten Tomatoes would indicate that this isn’t John Carpenter’s best work since Halloween.

Best Review

Basically, this is a ghost story merged with a slasher film and sealed with Shutter Island twist. But at least Carpenter the spook-meister knows how to goose you.

Owen Gleiberman – Entertainment Weekly

Worst Review

Continues the painful decline of a director who seems more nostalgic for past glories than excited about new ideas.

Jeannette Catsoulis – New York Times

Our Recommendation

Re-watch Halloween and The Thing.

Project Nim

About a chimpanzee who in the 1970s became the focus of a experiment which aimed to show that an ape could learn to communicate with language if raised and nurtured like a human child. So basically, the reverse of Tarzan.

Critics are loving this documentary, granting it a 95% thus far.

Best Review

“Project Nim” is practically irresistible. The story keeps getting odder and richer and more complicated.

Michael Phillips – Chicago Tribune

Worst Review

Another singular case exploited and expanded to look ordinary.

Chris Cabin – Filmcritic.com

Our Recommendation

How can a movie starring a cute baby monkey be bad? It can’t be, damnit.

Sorry I snapped. I’m just a little upset that Boy Meets World season six is out, and I’m stuck at work like a jackass instead of watching it. I’m sure you can sympathize. Also out this week is Das Boot, for those of you who like to watch Nazis on boats. There’s other stuff coming out as well, but if I list it all here, you won’t bother to read on. So take a look below.

Here’s this week’s DVD Rundown!

New Releases

13 Assassins	BloodRayne: The Third Reich	Hobo with a Shotgun	Das Boot

Television

Life According to Jim (S:4)	Boy Meets World (S:6)	The Cape (S:1)	Victorious (S:1 Vol. 1)

So, what’s playing this weekend? You might be sorry you asked.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Michael Bay is back, and this time, it’s personal. I’ve always wanted to use that line, and now I have!

7 photosRosie Huntington-Whiteley

Best Review
It’s a momentous achievement and it will make untold amounts of money and you should see it even though it’s hateful and empty and preaches the worst kind of reactionary violence without even really meaning it.

Andrew O’Hehir – Salon.com

Worst Review
Watchin Transformers: Dark of the Moon makes you die a little inside. Is this the future of movies? God help us! Michael Bay, you’ve done it again.

Peter Travers – Rolling Stone

Our Recommendation
For the most part, the reviews have been horrible. But honestly, what else is there to say? It’s just more of the same, so there’s no point in defending or decrying this film. If you enjoy Michael Bay’s mindless explosion-filled mayhem, go and see it. If you don’t, don’t.

Larry Crowne

Through the years, Tom Hanks has made many memorable romantic comedies.

New 'Larry Crowne' Trailer Is Like A More Serious 'Back To School'

Best Review
Too cute for its own good, Larry Crowne is nonetheless hard to dislike.

Steven Rea – Philadelphia Inquirer

Worst Review
Soulless Hollywood product doesn’t provide a better textbook example than this Tom Hanks/Julia Roberts vehicle.

Peter Howell – Toronto Star

Our Recommendation
Unless you’re a 50-year-old housewife, you’re probably not going to enjoy this film. Then again, given the other options you have to choose from this weekend, it might win the title of “most watchable” by default.

Monte Carlo

If you’re a tween girl, I’ve got some great news for you.

'Monte Carlo' Trailer Looks Generally Horrible

Best Review
For girls of a certain age (and their mothers), Monte Carlo hits the sweet spot.

Carrie Rickey – Philadelphia Inquirer

Worst Review
It’s chirpy, it’s bright, there are pretty locations and lots happens. This is the kind of movie that can briefly hold the attention of a cat.

Roger Ebert – Chicago Sun-Times

Our Recommendation
If you want your wives and daughters viewing a film that hits their “sweet spots,” then by all means, send them to this Monte Carlo. For the rest of you, avoid it like the plague.

At any rate, here’s this week’s DVD Rundown!

New Releases

Sucker Punch	Season of the Witch	Barney’s Version	Beastly

LOTR Extended	Jumangi	Cowboy Bebop	Stuart Little

Television

Law and Order: Criminal Intent (S:6)	Ancient Aliens (S:2)	Warehouse 13 (S:2)	WWE: Greatest Cage Matches

How does Cars 2 match up to other Pixar films? Does Cameron Diaz pull off her role as bad teacher? Is it weird watching Conan O’Brien’s pasty skin on the big screen? You’ll get the answer to those questions and more in this week’s edition of What’s Playing?

Cars 2

If you liked Cars, I’ve got some good news. The gang from the original is back, and this time, they’re competing with cars from around the globe in the first ever World Grand Prix.

3 photosI Wish 'Cars 2' Looked As Awesome As Its Poster Art

Best Review
I blow a piston whenever 2006′s Cars gets trashed as the runt of the Pixar litter. The sequel is a tire-burning burst of action and fun with a beating heart under its hood.

Peter Travers – Rolling Stone

Worst Review
Mater is dumb, excitable and puppy-dog loyal, his idiot-savant automotive expertise grounded in humble, blue-collar simplicity. I doubt anyone will protest much, but Pixar has now found its redneck Jar-Jar Binks. Such a proud moment.

A.O. Scott – New York Times

Our Recommendation
While it might not be the best of the bunch, anything with the name Pixar on it is going to be at least tolerable, especially if you’re stuck taking kids to the movies. And with the top critics split, there’s a reasonable chance you might enjoy it.

Bad Teacher

As the tag line says, some teachers just don’t give an F. Unfortunately, some film critics do.

6 photosCameron Diaz

Best Review
“Bad Teacher” is exactly the one-joke movie that you probably expect it to be, but there are enough variations and shadings of that one joke to sustain its brief running time — just barely.

Christy Lemire – Associated Press

Worst Review
We’re not on Elizabeth’s side, or anyone else’s, really. We’re just watching a film try to pass off misanthropic blunt-wittedness as ”edge.”

Owen Gleiberman – Entertainment Weekly

Our Recommendation
If you’re in the mood for a comedy, Bad Teacher might get the job done. But based on the lackluster reviews, you’re probably better off waiting for something better.

Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop

Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop is a behind the scenes look at O’Brien’s 32-city comedy tour that took place after his less-than-amicable departure from NBC.

New Trailer: 'Conan O'Brien Can't Stop' And So He Didn't

Best Review
If the principal audience for “Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop” is obviously the comedian’s legions of fans, it’s probably most interesting as a detached study of the workings of fame.

Andrew O’Hehir – Salon.com

Worst Review
The whole thing becomes a sort of “Song of Myself” for needy multimillionaire comics at work and play.

Michael Phillips – Chicago Tribune

Our Recommendation
Overall, reviews have been favorable, with the film currently holding a 79% fresh rating at Rotten Tomatoes. That seems to indicate that even non-fans can find something to enjoy about this film. Or, you can always sit at home eating prunes and watching Leno.

At any rate, enjoy this week’s DVD Rundown!

New Releases

Unknown	Diary of a Wimpy Kid	The Adjustment Bureau	Cedar Rapids

Television

Rocko’s Modern Life (S:1)	The Closer (S:6)	Louie (S:1)	Medium (S:7)

So, what’s playing this weekend?

Green Lantern

The Green Lantern, starring Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively, tells the story of a man who is transported to a far-away planet and enlisted in a intergalactic military/police force known as the Green Lantern Corps. Based on the critical reception alone, this film is everything a summer movie should be.

33 photos‘Green Lantern’ Stills…And Stills…And Stills

Best Review
Serves up all the requisite elements with enough self-deprecating humor to suggest it doesn’t take itself too seriously.

Todd McCarthy – Hollywood Reporter

Worst Review
As a disjointed rumble in the cosmos, it’s both too much and too little, and too dorky looking. In this case, Green means stop.

Tom Long – Detroit News

Our Recommendation
If it’s a comic book movie you want, go and see X-Men: First Class, or wait for Captain America to come out. If neither of those options sound appealing, then just stay home and have sex with your girlfriend. (Insert your own “comic book guys don’t get laid” joke here).

Mr. Popper’s Penguins

Starring Jim Carrey and a bunch of birds, this film tells the story of a New York business man who inherits six penguins. Sounds plausible.

5 photosPeep Out ‘Mr. Popper’s Penguins’ Pics

Best Review
With, say, Eddie Murphy as the star, Mr. Popper’s Penguins might have been a glorified paycheck contrivance. But Carrey is so naturally stylized that he coaxes the film’s gentle, creature-feature insanity to life.

Owen Gleiberman – Entertainment Weekly

Worst Review
Everything about the idea of “Mr. Popper’s Penguins” sounds lovely, and everything about the actual movie is ugly.

Mick LaSalle – San Francisco Chronicle

Our Recommendation
If you have kids, this film might be a tolerable enough way to kill an hour and a half. Then again, if you have kids, you’ve already given up on life, so why even bother reading the reviews?

Buck

Well, they can’t all be bad, right? If you happen to live close to where Buck is playing, you might want to check it out.

The film currently has an 88% RT ratting, which is more than the previous two films combined. Buck tells the story of a real American Cowboy who is adept at training problem horses. It must be a lot better than it sounds on paper.

Best Review
This is going to sound corny, but here goes: “Buck” will make you want to be a better person.

Christy Lemire – Associated Press

Worst Review
I don’t know why, but I just can’t get all worked up over Dan (Buck) Brannaman, subject of the documentary “Buck.”

V.A. Musetto – New York Post

Our Recommendation
While a documentary about a guy hanging out with horses might not seem all that exciting, the reviews are positive across the board. But clearly, it’s not for everybody. If crappy CGI and aliens with lanterns is more your style, you know where to turn.

New Releases

Hall Pass	Battle: Los Angeles	Red Riding Hood	Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son

Classics

Cincinnati Kid	Heavy Metal	Harry Potter 5	Harry Potter 6

Television

Man vs. Food (S3)	The Glades (S1)	Haven (S1)	House of Payne (S8)

Here’s a look at what’s playing.

8 photosNew ‘Super 8′ Stills Show Everything (But The Monster)

Super 8

If you like Steven Spielberg, you’re probably anxious to see J.J. Abrams’ Super 8. The film is basically a love note to the acclaimed director of E.T., Close Encounters, and lest we forget, 1941.

See, even geniuses shit the bed once in a while.

Best Review
Super 8 is a wonderful film, nostalgia not for a time but for a style of filmmaking, when shell-shocked young audiences were told a story and not pounded over the head with aggressive action.

Roger Ebert – The Chicago Sun-Times

Worst Review
Sadly, the helmer seems too smitten working with Steven Spielberg to recognize that his idol-turned-champion created the very paradigm that limits his passion project, forcing this modest nostalgia trip to function as a blockbuster.

Peter Debruge – Variety

Our Recommendation
Over all, there seems to be a lot to like about this film, provided you haven’t bought into the hype. If you set out with realistic expectations, you’ll probably enjoy it. But if you are already expecting a classic, be prepared for disappointment…just like my wife.

Midnight in Paris

Woody Allen‘s latest film is finally getting a wide release. And that’s great news, if you like Woody Allen.

‘Midnight In Paris’ Trailer: Now It’s Owen Wilson’s Turn To Imitate Woody Allen

Best Review
As a filmmaker, Allen has grappled with the temptations of repeating himself instead of forging a fresh path. You can feel that conflict here, and watching him work it out is exhilarating.

Peter Travers – Rolling Stone

Worst Review
Pure Woody Allen. Which is not to say great or even good Woody, but a distillation of the filmmaker’s passions and crotchets, and of his tendency to pass draconian judgment on characters the audience is not supposed to like.

Richard Corliss – TIME Magazine

Our Recommendation
If you’re OK with a guy banging his pseudo step-daughter, be sure and check out Midnight in Paris!

Troll Hunter

Troll Hunter is not your father’s troll hunting film. Unless of course you are very young, and your father worked on this film, in which case, it is.

Trolls Are Larger Than Life In 'Troll Hunter' Trailer

Best Review
You’ll want to catch this clever movie before Hollywood ruins everything with a dumb remake.

V.A. Musetto – New York Post

Worst Review
Here’s what’s not so good in Troll Hunter: the actual troll hunting.

Noel Murray – AV Club

Our Recommendation
If you’re in the mood for something different, this film will certainly deliver. The premise isn’t for everyone, but with genuinely positive reviews, you can do a lot worse.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

Jack Sparrow is back, and this time, it’s personal…or something like that.

Watch The New TV Spot For 'Pirates 4' Or "Die Trying"

Louder Than a Bomb

Louder Than a Bomb follows a group of Chicago high schoolers as they compete in a youth poetry slam.
 
Now that sounds like a film that was screaming to be made.
 
Best Review
Greg Jacobs and Jon Siskel’s Louder Than a Bomb is an affecting and superbly paced celebration of American youth at their creative best.
 
Robert Koehler – Variety
 
Worst Review
Well, this is awkward. There are no negative reviews for this film. But I get paid by the word, so I’ll use this opportunity type a long and rambling sentence that serves no other purpose but to increase the size of my next paycheck.
 
Our Recommendation
Since the film is rocking a 100% rating at Rotten Tomatoes, there’s no way I can tell you not to see this film. But I will tell you what my dad told me on my 18th birthday: “rhyming is for assholes.”
 

Midnight in Paris

Midnight in Paris, a romantic comedy set in the city of lights, is the latest outing from director Woody Allen.

‘Midnight In Paris’ Trailer: Now It’s Owen Wilson’s Turn To Imitate Woody Allen

But this week, I’ve decided to take a different approach. Below you will find a list of new films that are being released this weekend, along with the best and worst reviews we could find. I hope you’re happy, mom.

Priest

Priest tells the story of a priest. That’s about it. Oh, wait! There’s more.

New ‘Priest’ Trailer A Work Of Vampire Alarmism

Best Review
A surprisingly effective piece of genre filmmaking, littered with flaws but none so glaring as to sink the film as a whole.

Thomas Leupp – Hollywood.com

Worst Review
Lately, it feels like there are two things you can count on in a Screen Gems movie. 1) It will suck. 2) It will feature Cam Gigandet. And he will suck.

Alonso Duralde – HitFix

Our Recommendation
With a 19% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, I recommend staying away from this priest like he was Father Geoghan.

bridesmaids

This week seems to be filled with rather obvious movie titles. Priest, Bridesmaids, etc.

Jon Hamm's Soup Is Done In 'Bridesmaids' Red-Band Trailer

Best Review
Is this the female version of The Hangover? No – Bridesmaids is much funnier and way more heartfelt and human than that film.

Devin Faraci – CHUD

Worst Review
Cringe-inducing, uneven, juvenile, overlong and painfully unfunny. It’s a witless blend of crudeness, rudeness and lewdness which sets a new low for American comedy.

Avi Offer – NYC Movie Guru

Our Recommendation
After watching the trailer, I was skeptical. But I should have had more faith in producer Judd Apatow. And since it has an RT ratting of 90%, I’ve gotta say the critics who don’t like this film are definitely in the minority. No, really, I have to say that because 10% is by definition a minority.

Everything Must Go

When a drunken salesmen loses his job and his wife in the same day, he is forced to sell all of his belongings via yard sale to make ends meet.

Will Ferrell Is A Broken And Miserable Man In ‘Everything Must Go’

Best Review
Will Ferrell delivers a performance of implosive intensity that rings true in every detail.

Peter Travers – Rolling Stone

Worst Review
It lives up to its title in ways its maker never intended.

Ty Burr – Boston Globe

Our Recommendation
From the look of it, Will Ferrell is trying to follow in the steps of Bill Murray by proving himself as a dramatic actor. His first outing, Stranger Than Fiction, got the ball rolling. And the mostly positive reviews for Everything Must Go give us no reason to doubt his potential. See for yourself.