Screen Junkies » Movies

‘J. Edgar’ Actress Naomi Watts

Screen Junkies — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 18:17:55 +0000

Naomi Watts gets into character as legendary civil servant Helen Gandy in J. Edgar. The role finds her opposite Leonardo DiCaprio, who portrays the titular FBI honcho. Best known for her work in Mullholand Drive and 21 Grams, Watts will continue to grace the silver screen over the next year with parts in The Impossible, Movie 43, and The Bleeder.

Immortals

Screen Junkies — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 01:13:44 +0000

Director: Tarasem Singn

Cast: Henry Cavill, Mickey Rourke, John Hurt

Synopsis: Theseus is a mortal man chosen by Zeus to lead the fight against the ruthless King Hyperion, who is on a rampage across Greece to obtain weapon that can destroy humanity.

Release Date: November 11, 2011

Melancholia

Screen Junkies — Wed, 09 Nov 2011 01:25:39 +0000

Director: Lars von Trier

Cast: Kirsten Dunst, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Kiefer Sutherland

Synopsis: Two sisters find their already strained relationship challenged as a mysterious new planet threatens to collide into the Earth.

Release Date: May 26, 2011

6 Theater Snacks That Should Have Died Before Dippin’ Dots

Penn Collins — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 23:32:03 +0000

It was revealed today that Dippin Dots, the ice cream of the future, may very well become a novelty of the past. The company just filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. I find this odd because I remember Dippin’ Dots when I was like 13 years old. I’m now 31. It took them 18 years to become insolvent? That’s amazing. I can’t imagine Dippin’ Dots were getting more popular during that time. I guess the owner was slowly selling his organs to cover operational costs, and his Guatemalan physician finally said “No mas. Va a morir, Senor Deepeen Dot!”

Well, I will admit that their demise is overdue, but it boggles the mind that they went belly up before so many other craptacular theater “treats.” When you’re paying roughly the same for theater snacks by the ounce as you are for gold bullion, you should never be let down, but these six offenders do it again and again, no matter how many times I yell at them.

That’s right. I yell at my candy.

Sno-Caps

As best I can tell, a Sno-Cap is a chocolate chip covered with microsized sprinkles. That’s just two toppings put together. That’s not a snack. That’s bullshit.

My diligent research has just informed me that the little things covering the chocolate chips are called nonpareils. “Nonpareil” means “unequaled,” so I can only assume that these little white balls are called “nonpareils” because they are unequaled in their awfulness.

Also, the chocolate is semi-sweet. I swear to God. They don’t even use milk chocolate?

This country’s going to hell.

Dots (Non-Dippin’)

Dots are made by Tootsie Roll, and their only use is fusing together the eater’s upper and lower molars for five minutes at a time. They have no discernible taste, their texture is dangerously sticky, and they cost a lot of money. This candy is worse than Dippin’ Dots and should have gone out of business before my grandfather was born.

Would the person who still buys Dots please stop? I feel like it’s just one Monty Burns-type character who is keeping them in circulation just to piss people off.

9 Reasons Netflix Is Still A Great Deal

Nicholas Pell — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 20:01:27 +0000

Much teeth-gnashing and crying in the darkness followed Netflix announcement that it was separating its DVD / Blu-Ray and streaming services. When Netflix unrolled its new DVD / Blu-Ray service, Qwikster, the response was a bit like when everyone found out the long-awaited Apple tablet had a name that sounded like a jam rag. While we’ll miss being able to get a new flick delivered to our door via U.S. mail and stream over the series of tubes at one low price, it could be a lot worse. Tons of things are more expensive than subscribing to both Netflix services. Here are nine.

Check out 10 reasons to stay on netflix!

Going to the Movies

Nothing ever compares to the experience of watching a movie in a cool, dark room with a mob of other people. You laugh harder, cry more and walk away with an experience greater than just seeing a flick. You also go home about $30 lighter than you went in — make that $50 if you bring a date. Between skyrocketing ticket prices and the minor atrocities committed at the concession stand, going to the cinema is a far greater expense than throwing Netflix / Qwikster whatever it is they finally end up charging for both services.

Renting Movies

Just in case anyone is still rocking Hammer pants, listening to Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch, buying CDs and renting videos, we’d like to point out that this is a very expensive way to catch a film. At three bucks per — the price that renting movies cost the last time we wandered into a video rental place, somewhere around 1994 — or one dollar per night — apparently what those boxes outside of the 7-11 charge for the privilege of having a hard copy of How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days — renting movies like grandma used to is going to add up real quick.

Torrenting

Torrenting your favorite movie is, in theory, free. That’s one of the things people love about it. But it isn’t free when you add in the cost of getting sued by the MPAA. Laugh all you like. The movie industry has decided to redouble its efforts to hunt down and punish people like you who don’t want to shell out their hard-earned lettuce to find out Captain America: The First Avenger is possibly the worst super hero film since Punisher War Journal. The worst is when you get sued by the porn industry, which is happening more and more these days. Basement dwellers of the world are going to lose more than just money when pornographers come knocking on mom’s door inquiring about who downloaded Teen Butt Sluts Vol. 9.

Hula Hoop: The Movie? You Know, For Kids!

Dave Horwitz — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 20:47:50 +0000

Battleship? Okay, could be a cool action movie? Monopoly? I guess so? It’s at least timely, with the recession and all. Ouija? You’re pushing it, but I guess it could be a horror movie. But HULA HOOP? That’s not even a board game, it’s a thing! It’s a circle that goes around your waist and then you move your hips.”

That’s what a normal person would say, but since no one in Hollywood is normal, we are going to see a movie about/inspired by the children’s toy. What could it even be about? ICM doesn’t care, as they’ve just signed Wham-O Toys as a client, with the intent to develop film projects out of kid favorites like the Hula Hoop, Slip-n-Slide, and Frisbee. What’s next? Bop It: The Next Generation? Silly Putty: The Animated series? Wrong. It’s the apocalypse. The apocalypse is next. (Badass News)