Screen Junkies » movie MILFs http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Mon, 15 Sep 2014 23:40:14 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 21 Hottest TV and Movie MILFs Of All Time http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/21-hottest-tv-and-movie-milfs-of-all-time/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/21-hottest-tv-and-movie-milfs-of-all-time/#comments Fri, 06 May 2011 07:01:20 +0000 Screen Junkies http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=210756 It’s Mother’s Day again, the one day out of the year when you stop and say thank you to the woman who had sex with a stranger on a pool...

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It’s Mother’s Day again, the one day out of the year when you stop and say thank you to the woman who had sex with a stranger on a pool table, thereby bringing you into this world. And what would this special occasion be without a list that objectifies fictional mothers from both film and television? I’ll tell you what it’d be: a horrible waste of everyone’s time! Well, we’re not about to let that happen. In honor of women everywhere who managed to get themselves knocked up, we present the 21 hottest TV and movie MILFs of all time. Happy Mother’s Day!

Stacy Edwards as Evan’s Mom – Superbad (2007)

Evan’s mom isn’t on screen for very long, but the character serves two important functions. First of all, she allows the audience to see what a pervert Seth is. Second, she allows us to see her cleavage.

Jane Seymour as Kathleen Cleary – Wedding Crashers (2005)

Jane Seymour is best known as Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman. At least she was, until she played a horney, psychotic MILF in Wedding Crashers. I have to say, the second role was a vast improvement.

Mary Tyler Moore as Laura Petrie – “The Dick Van Dyke Show” (1961)

People remember Mary Tyler Moore for her own show. But sometimes, people forget she started out with Dick Van Dyke. They also forget that she was one hot mom, back in the day. By back in the day, I mean a simpler time, when randomly breaking out into a song about Cleopatra during a house party was socially acceptable.

Emilie de Ravin as Claire Littleton – “Lost” (2004)

How hot was the character of Claire Littleton on “Lost?” Let’s just say that even at nine months pregnant, she still looked better than any woman you’ll ever sleep with. Or men, for that matter.

Eva Longoria as Gabrielle Solis – “Desperate Housewives” (2004)

The only thing desperate about this house wife was my plan to win over the actress who plays her (Eva Longoria) by slowly and methodically killing her house pets. For the record, it didn’t work. But in the greater scheme of things, it didn’t really hurt, either.

Lea Thompson as Lorraine Baines McFly – Back to the Future (1985)

With the possible exception of the Virgin Mary, every mother on earth has banged a dude at least once. We’d all like to believe that in the case of our own mothers, it was a one-time occurrence. But Lorraine Baines McFly from Back to the Future makes us face up to the face that at some point, all of our moms were probably filthy sex-crazed skanks.

Angelina Jolie as Grendel’s Mother – Beowulf (2007)

Angelina Jolie would probably rank higher on this list if Grendel’s Mother’s wasn’t a monster spawnin devil woman. But she is, so let’s leave it at that.

Jennifer Coolidge as Stifler’s Mom- American Pie (1999)


EMBED-Hot Mom Clip #1 – Watch more free videos

I high school, what would have been better than banging your enemy’s mom? Well, for me, banging anyone would have been fine. However Paul Finch from “American Pie” was able to live the enemy’s mom banging fantasy, thanks to the help of Stifler’s mom.

Florence Henderson as Carol Brady – “The Brady Bunch” (1969)

Admit it! You know you wanted to bone Mrs. Brady! After all, who didn’t? Well, the guy who played Mr. Brady, for starters. But I digress.

Diane Lane as Connie Sumner – Unfaithful

Connie Sumner is the perfect mom, except for the fact that she bangs dirty foreigners she meets in the street. But other than that, she’s cool.

Beverly D’angelo as Ellen Griswold – National Lampoon’s Vacation

Ellen Griswold has a rack that won’t quit. I don’t even know what that means, but I’ve always wanted to type it. Anyway, how she ended up with a clod like Clark is beyond me. Good for Sparky.

Amy Stock-Poynton as Missy Preston – Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure

As Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure taught us, if your dad is going to remarry, hopefully it’s with an ugly woman close to his age. Otherwise, you’re bound to have some confusing feelings.

Jaime Pressly as Joy Turner – “My Name Is Earl” (2005)

Joy Turner is suppose to be pure-white trash. Obviously the writers of this show didn’t have a clue. If they had been going for realism, they would have given her meth-stained teeth and stretch marks. Then again, unlike Jaime Pressly’s hot body, realism is overrated.

Maria Bello as Edie Stall – A History of Violence

The cheerleader scene in A History of Violence is one of the hottest in film history. It’s far superior to the stair-way pseudo-rape scene that occurs later in the film, unless of course you’re into that sort of thing, which, as you can see from my numerous acquittals I am not.

Halle Berry as Leticia Musgrove – Monster’s Ball

Halle Berry plays a mom in this film. At least that’s what it said in Wikipedia when I looked it up. All I remember is that bastard Billy Bob Thornton humping away on her like she was the couch in my mom’s basement. I’m sorry we couldn’t show you the video, but I did find this clip on YouTube that actually shows breasts, which is like winning the lottery. Enjoy.

January Jones as Betty Draper -”Mad Men” (2007)

Mad Men‘s” Betty Draper makes me long for the 1950′s, a simpler time when TV’s were shitty and didn’t feature a constant HD barrage of hot actresses like January Jones paraded in front of your face making your girlfriend look obese.

Natalie Portman as Padmé – Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones

Technically, Padmé isn’t a MILF when she shows some skin in AOTC. But if you’re really going to quibble that point, there’s a reason you’re still a virgin, ya nerf herder.

Julie Benz as Rita Bennett -”Dexter” (2006)

As the clip above demonstrates, Rita Bennett was one sexy mom. I used to fantasize about taking a bath with her. Unfortunately, that fantasy was ruined in the forth season.

Mary-Louise Parker as Nancy Botwin -”Weeds” (2005)

Not only is Nancy Botwin hot, but she’ll also get you high. If there was ever a reason to date a woman with kids, that’s the one.

Anne Bancroft as Mrs. Robinson – The Graduate (1967)

Mrs. Robinson from the graduate is the Mother of all movie MILF’s. In fact, she’s so legendary, somebody should really write a song about her.

Sofia Vergara as Gloria Pritchett -”Modern Family” (2009)

Sofia Vergara is on a relatively new show, so I can see why some would argue that “Gloria Pritchett” doesn’t belong in the number one spot. Even so, look at her cleavage. It’s timeless.

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http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/21-hottest-tv-and-movie-milfs-of-all-time/feed/ 4 Stacy_Edwards_superbad 17.-A-History-of-Violence_imagelarge halle-berry-monsters-ball natalie-portman-sexy-white-starwars
10 HOTTEST MOVIE MOMS http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/10-hottest-movie-moms/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/10-hottest-movie-moms/#comments Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 It's Mother's Day on sunday, and Screenjunkies is saluting the top ten movie moms from whom we wouldn't mind receiving a spanking.  Deciding this was difficult.  We pored over days' worth of DVDs...  held focus groups in top secret testing facilities underneath Beverly Hills... and even phoned our Dads to get their opinions.  What resulted is this list - a virtual who's who of cinematic MILFage from the past twenty years.  You may not agree with them as your personal ten, but you can't deny that if any of them were your mother... then you probably have/had a lot of friends ask to spend the night at your place in high school.Send in the MOMS!!! HALLE BERRY as Leticia Musgrove in Monster's Ball

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It’s Mother’s Day on sunday, and Screenjunkies is saluting the top ten movie moms from whom we wouldn’t mind receiving a spanking.  Deciding this was difficult.  We pored over days’ worth of DVDs…  held focus groups in top secret testing facilities underneath Beverly Hills… and even phoned our Dads to get their opinions.  What resulted is this list – a virtual who’s who of cinematic MILFage from the past twenty years.  You may not agree with them as your personal ten, but you can’t deny that if any of them were your mother… then you probably have/had a lot of friends ask to spend the night at your place in high school.

Send in the MOMS!!!

 

HALLE BERRY as Leticia Musgrove in Monster’s Ball

         

Halle Berry is one of the hottest women on the planet, in any capacity – though especially when naked.  Go figure.  There was Swordfish, of course, but that was an appetizer.  Monster’s Ball, however, was more like a Berry smorgasbord… with the unfortunate aftertaste of Billy Bob Thornton ass.  Thankfully  you can edit that stuff out with consumer grade digital editing software now.  Halle’s role as the hot single mom nabbed her an Oscar, proving getting naked on camera does pay.  Hear that, impressionable aspring actresses of the world? 

 

 

BEVERLY D’ANGELO as Ellen Griswold in Nat’l Lampoon’s European Vacation

         

Beverly D’ Angelo is best known as being the middle American Ellen Griswold in the National Lampoon’s Vacation movies, but underneath the conservative facade, a tigress was waiting to be unleashed.  It only took a some coaxing from Clark and a video camera that puts Zack Morris’s cell phone to shame.  In the second installment of the series, Ellen flaunted it in front of the camera, which was then stolen and… well, just watch the clip below.  In this instance, it does not pay to get naked on camera.  But you can still end up a movie star.


Hot Mom Clip #3 – Watch more Movie Trailers

 

 

ANGELINA JOLIE as Grendel’s Mother in Beowulf

         

Probably the most notorious actress (and real life mom) of our time isAngelina Jolie.  I’m not sure if it’s holding a vial of Billy Bob Thornton’s blood, or making Brad Pitt’s life a living hell (or so that’s what the tabloids tell us) that makes her such a media spectacle, but I digress.  She played Grendel’s Mother in the motion capture animation extravaganza Beowulf, and was the hottest CG creature with a tail we’ve ever seen, possibly because her only competition is Sean Connery in Dragonheart.

 

 

 

BEYONCÉ KNOWLES as Sharon in Obsessed

         

Beyoncé has generally played the foxy, single woman roles, but now, at an ancient 28 years old, she’s playing Idris Elba’s wife and mother of his child in her newest film, Obsessed.  She’s always acted older than her age, for sure, as she started in music at an early age until, like most talented young female artists, she moved into movies where she hit it even bigger to which Beyoncé has become a household name.  Be sure to check out Taco Perkins’ review of the film here

 

 

MARIA BELLO as Edie Stall in A History of Violence

         

Maria Bello has been in numerous movies and is definitely not afraid to show herself off.  Starting out guest starring in a number of TV shows, Maria made her way into movies in Coyote Ugly, after which she moved on to countless projects with Hollywood’s finest.  One of her most memorable roles would have to be in A History Of Violence where she starred as the mother to Viggo’s children, dressed up like a cheerleader, and got busy on the staircase with her husband (in a scene that cannot be shown here, so you’ll have to settle for the cheerleading scene).


Hot Mom Clip #4 – Watch more Movie Trailers

 

 

AMY STOCK-POYNTON as Missy Preston in Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure

 

         

Amy Stock-Poynton appeared in exremely minor roles in 80s classics like Summer School and Sould Man, but then started working a lot more frequently after playing Bill S. Preston, Esquire’s hot Stepmother in Bill And Ted’s Excellent Adventure.  She reappeard in the sequel, Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey, but as Missy Logan (Ted’s stepmom).  Twist!  Speaking of twists, Amy also appeared in Murder, She Wrote, which was an excellent show, but in no way will ever surpass Bill & Ted on the excellence scale, as bitchin’ as Angela Lansbury is.


Hot Mom Clip #2 – Watch more Funny Videos

 

JANE SEYMOUR as Kathleen Cleary in The Wedding Crashers

         

Jane Seymour is Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman, and her show ran for years, keeping herout of the movie scene for some time.  However, after several TV movies and smaller features, she got the memorable supporting role of the elegant mom/lascivious cougar lady cast aside Christopher Walken in Wedding Crashers

 

 

KATE WINSLET as Sarah Pierce in Little Children

         

Playing a mom is not a new role for Kate Winslet, though in Little Children, she was certainly the hottest, despite the films controversial story.  Obviously Titanic is what put Kate Winslet on the map, but certainly every one of her roles has gained her notoriety as a beautiful and talented artist.  Her crowning achievement?  Feigning surprise when she won an Oscar this year for The Reader after taking home a Golden Globe for Revolutionary Road.  I mean, c’mon.  Did you really think you wouldn’t? 

 

 

DIANE LANE as Connie Sumner in Unfaithful

         

Diane Lane is that face most of us know but not necessarily her name.  She’s a talented and eclectic actress who’s been in everything from Murder at 1600 to Unfaithful, to which she played a sexy mom and unloyal wife to Richard Gere.  And much to her credit, the role landed her an Oscar Nomination.  Here’s a montage of Diane in the film, ruined by a melodramatic Rihanna song. 

 

 

JENNIFER COOLIDGE as Stifler’s Mom in American Pie

         

We all know Jennifer Coolidge as the one and only Stifler’s Mom.  And being the voluptuous, blonde beauty she is, it gained her infinitely more roles in a wide variety of movies afterwards as the voluptuous, blonde beauty, either as a trashy manicurist in Legally Blonde, the gold digging closet lesbian in Best In Show, and any such role that falls in between.  Despite the eclectic range of roles being a MILF got her, I’ll always see Stifler’s mom.


Hot Mom Clip #1 – Watch more Movie Trailers

 

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