Geez, take it down a notch.
Somehow Mike White has emerged as the lead contender to direct hot project Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, according to the LA Times. The very white writer of School of Rock and Orange County, and director of Year of the Dog, has climbed up the legs and arms and faces of more appropriate candidates Mike Newell, David Slade, Neil Marshall, Jonathan Demme, and Matt Reeves to get the studio's approving wink.
White would bring his comedic chops to the project, but he doesn't have the special effects chops to create decayed zombie chops. Mike Newell, the guy behind the Harry Potter movies, could definitely take care of the effects, but his family sensibilities might make the horror elements suffer. Can someone just get Sam Raimi on the line already? He could shoot this thing in his sleep. 

The director's chair left vacant by David O. Russell on Pride And Prejudice And Zombies is being retro-fitted for a few more asses. Jonathan Demme, Matt Reeves, the Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs guys, and Mike White joined previously announced asses David Slade, Neil Marshall, and Mike Newell for a shot at plunking down for some on-set bad back support.
As with everything nowadays, the casting list is also uncertain now that Natalie Portman has walked from the starring role. Bradley Cooper, Scarlett Johansson, Mia Wasoshoushawkasa, Tilda Swinton, and Catherine O'Hara are all rumored for the project. It's impressive that so many big names (and Mike White) are interested in the project. I'm sure it will end up in good hands (or Mike White's). (The Wrap)

Zombieland director Ruben Fleischer is having the kind of year all film school graduates dream about and then usually never experience. He's already onto directing his next project 30 Minutes of Less with Danny McBride as a pizza deliveryman, and now he's signed on to helm Babe in the Woods.The Mike White-scripted comedy is about "a female freshman who arrives at Yale and is targeted by the New Jersey mob." See the title, it's a pun. In this case the "Babe" means "hot college ass," not "pig." The exact reason why the babe is targeted by the New Jersey mob is unknown, but if I had to guess, she probably witnesses the mob hit of a boy she befriends in the beginning of the first act. And if I get that right on the nose, Columbia Pictures owes me an Edible Arrangement. Chocolate-dipped pineapple, please. (Deadline)

Justin Long and Mike White put together this amusing video in support of gay marriage. The message is simple: If you disagree with the homosexual lifestyle, why not overturn Prop 8 and make them get married, like the rest of us? Everyone deserves the right to be miserable and stuck in a monotonous blessed union. They also deserve the right to own a veiny penis surfboard. Check out the PSA after the jump.