“We didn’t start talking about [it] until we saw the numbers, but then we said, ‘Oh, okay. I think we should do a third one’.”

Oh man. I wish I could just end the article right here. With that quote. Fuck it. I’m going to.

If those sex traffickers had real dads, this vacation would have gone off without a hitch.

After the first film underwhelmed like a muthaf***a, Sam Worthington pinky-swore that the sequel would be somewhat better. He said in an accent that waivered between English and Australian, “I think the first one, we kind of let down some people. What we’re setting out to do on this one — the writers and the director and myself — is improve.”

And apparently the way to improve is to add lava. All is forgiven, Sam Worthington. All is forgiven.

So we took a stroll through his film resume and pulled pics that required he look absolutely ridiculous. In the process, I found myself getting mad at movies that feature his real hair. All your favorites are here, from rocking an uber-metal beard to being covered in butterflies. The man truly has no vanity.

And Gary Wiles, a biologist for the Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife, wants the world to know that.

In the film, which hits theaters today, Liam Neeson‘s character must survive in the Alaskan wilderness, staving off feral wolves. Despite the presence of over 60,000 wolves in the US, only two wolf-related deaths are on record, which is probably like only 20% of the wolf-related deaths featured in The Grey.

From Spokesman.com:

“The facts are so much different than what I suspect is portrayed in the movie,” said Wiles, who helped write Washington’s recently adopted wolf management and conservation plan. “I always say show me the evidence that people are being attacked.”

And before you contradict Mr. Wiles, let me remind you that he has crafted at least one wolf management plan. How many wolf management plans have you written and enacted? None, probably.

Screen Junkies is going to take a stand here. We side with Mr. Gary Wiles, but will allow and possibly even enjoy the fictitious portrayal of angry, evil wolves, much as we enjoyed the portrayal of Zach Galifianakis, Bradley Cooper, and Ed Helms as a “wolfpack,” though we are aware that they are human actors, and not actual wolves.

*boom goes the gavel*

While filming in Istanbul, Liam Neeson found he had an affinity to the religion of Islam. After feeling uncomforted by Christianity following the tragic death of his wife, Natasha Richardson, The Grey star found solace in the Call to Prayer custom.

The actor, 59, admitted Islamic prayer “got into his spirit” while filming in Turkish city Istanbul.

He said: “The Call to Prayer happens five times a day and for the first week it drives you crazy, and then it just gets into your spirit and it’s the most beautiful, beautiful thing.

“There are 4,000 mosques in the city. Some are just stunning and it really makes me think about becoming a Muslim.”

Some might be outraged by this admission, but its his personal choice. We aren’t in any position to judge a man seeking solace. Plus, it will probably mean he grows a ridiculous beard just like he does in his movies. I’m in full support.

Also, this info comes from The Sun, so chances are Neeson has never even been to Turkey.

Cast: Liam Neeson, Dermot Mulroney, Frank Grillo

Synopsis: In Alaska, an oil drilling team struggle to survive after a plane crash strands them in the wild. Hunting the humans are a pack of wolves who see them as intruders.

Release Date: January 27, 2012

Okay. The hackneyed use of Marilyn Manson is a sure indicator that this movie will suck, but you’ve gotta admit that the monsters and traps that Perseus fights his way through look a lot more creative. The Titans themselves, and the Cyclops and Griffin (or whatever it is) scenes look particularly intense, but I’m not too sure about the giant lava monster at the end. Do they make lava krakens now?

Turns out this time that Liam Neeson himself will be taken by the vengeful dad of a bad guy from the original. That could be cool. And then he has to fight a bunch of bad guys and get himself untaken? Nope. Instead, it’s now his daughter’s turn to rescue him along with the help of her reluctant boyfriend (Grimes). What is this? Spy Kids? Let’s hope for the best right now, but if Maggie Grace has to put in a call to that pop starlet character for some backup, I’m hucking my shoe at the screen. I may even bring extra shoes. (Variety)

7 photosBrooklyn Decker

Of course, it could be an all-out cheesefest that doesn’t strike the right balance of bullshit to awesome in the same way that Battle: Los Angeles did. But for right now, I’m gleefully optimistic that this movie is going to kick ass in a dumb fun kind of way. Unless, of course, Liam Neeson speaks the line, “They sank my battleship!” In which case, laaaaame.

Don’t read any further if you’re sensitive about Batman-related news.

Okay. Still there? Reports via HitFix are that a star from an earlier film in Nolan’s series was seen filming a part on set in London. And his her name is….. not Aaron Eckhart. Liam Neeson was recently spotted on the set filming a scene as Ra’s al Ghul (aka Batman’s least interesting enemy). Of course, that’s got comment sections and message boards blowing up. Is it a flashback? A Lazarus Pit-induced resurrection? Liam Neeson fulfilling his need to be in an ass-load of movies??????

I’m leaning toward flashback. Up until this point, Nolan’s Batman series have taken a more realistic approach and have avoided dealing with the supernatural or magic. Except for Morgan Freeman‘s winning smile. There’s always magic in that.

Neeson’s cameo as a tattoo artist in Bangkok was cut from The Hangover Part II. Director Todd Phillips needed to re-shoot the scene for continuity reasons three weeks ago, but Neeson was in London shooting Clash of the Titans 2: Titan Up. At the last minute, Phillips got Nick Cassavetes to sub-in.

“He came in and crushed it and that is the scene that you will ultimately see in the film,” said Phillips in a recent interview. “[I'm excited for everyone] to see the film. It turned out great.”

The small part has been recast three times. It was going to be played by Mel Gibson, until the cast was like, “he’s… kind of a horrible racist?” So then they cast Neeson, but the above hullabaloo led to Cassavetes nabbing the role. A lot of fuss over a small cameo – hopefully they had time to focus on, y’know, the rest of the movie.

The Hangover Part II drunkenly stumbles into theaters May 26, though the film may not remember it did that on the 27th. (Variety)

PENELOPE CRUZ will team up with director Woody Allen once again, this time on a film set in Rome. There are no plot details yet, but the computer program I wrote says the odds are very high that it won’t be as good as earlier Woody Allen movies. (EW)

THANDIE NEWTON will play opposite Tyler Perry in his next film Good Deeds, which Perry will write and direct as well. The film is about a successful businessman who must choose between his rich fiancée and a down-on-her-luck single mother. Even if it’s bad, Newton can take comfort that it can’t be worse than Norbit. (TheWrap)

JAY BARUCHEL will join Robert Pattinson, Samantha Morton, and Paul Giamatti in David Cronenberg’s Cosmopolis. Pattinson plays a billionaire who loses everything he has in one day, including his new wife. Bad things happening to Pattinson, I can get on board with. Baruchel plays the original founder and conscious at Pattinson’s company. (Deadline)

MAGGIE GRACE will star alongside Liam Neeson in Taken 2, produced by Luc Besson. And yes, the will-he-or-won’t-he-tension of whether Neeson would take on Taken 2 has been resolved in the affirmative. Eight-time “Namey” award winner Olivier Megaton will direct. (Deadline) (Collider)

“This big-screen version will be an origin story, showing how ex-Spec Ops mercenary Bodie and counter-terrorism detective Doyle unite to work for covert UK security unit CI5.”

The studio, Lionsgate UK, is reportedly courting Tom Hardy, Gerard Butler and Jason Statham to play the secret agents, while Liam Neeson and Gary Oldman are being sought to play their boss. It’s too bad they’re not all going to be in the movie – maybe if they’re all interested they’ll have to fight each other for roles. Judging by the list of actors being talked to, this looks to be an action movie in the vein of the recent “older action” movies The Expendables and RED. So tell your parents to be on the lookout for The Professionals. (via Deadline)

Besson has been putting together the sequel to the hit ex-CIA agent vs. the French Underworld drama, and he’s currently talking to Best Last Name Ever Award Winner Olivier Megaton (Transporter 3) about directing it. However, Besson wants to shoot Taken 2 this year, while forgettable Jedi Neeson wants to take the year off for personal reasons. Can you do a sequel without the lead from the original? Besson is willing to try: his list of possible replacements to play Bryan Mills (or a character very, very similar) includes Ralph Fiennes, Mickey Rourke, and Jason Isaacs.

Faced with replacing Neeson with “The Ram,” Besson recently went back to Neeson and the two are currently trying to work out a shooting schedule for late this year, but nothing is confirmed yet. (Deadline)

UPDATE: My hostage plan worked, I assume. Liam Neeson just officially signed on for Taken 2. Neeson will get some time off before dealing with more stuff getting taken – the sequel starts filming late 2011 / early 2012.

Unknown is not just a mediocre action movie. It’s actually bad. The thinking must have been: Liam Neeson was awesome in Taken. Let’s put him in another one. What have we got?

We meet Dr. Martin Harris (Liam Neeson) and his wife Liz (January Jones) vaguely enough as a traveling couple on an airplane and checking into a hotel. Not so close that we assume too much, but definitely established as a couple. Then Martin has to go back to the airport because he left a bag there. Isn’t that the plot of Police Academy V? I mean, without the suitcase switch, but come on!

Martin’s cab has an accident, he wakes up in the hospital and when he goes back to the hotel, Liz doesn’t recognize him and there’s another Dr. Harris (Aidan Quinn). Was everything we saw before a false memory? No, there are dudes trying to kill him so he has to beat them up.

The story only needs to be enough to set up the chase, but it is aggressively stupid. The details that make Martin suspicious are blatantly contrived. He tries to check back into the Eisenhower suite because he wasn’t there when the clerk told Liz it was booked. Martin tries to prove he’s the real Dr. Harris while the imposter recites the exact same backstory simultaneously. It’s like grown men playing that childish game of repeating everything the other one says.

It travels on such a cliché arc, it’s like an episode of “South Park” spoofing a movie like Unknown. When he sees the new Dr. Harris’s photo at the university website, the music practically booms: “Da dun duuuuuuuh!” Also, the U.S. Embassy is closed for Thanksgiving so he can’t clear anything up. Oh, and when the first knock at the door is a friend, the second knock is obviously the bad guys so check the peep hole before you assume your friend came back.

The danger is so banal. Martin escapes from a hospital half drugged by bad guys. It’s more of a stumble than a chase. There’s a crowbar fight, so if men whacking each other with metal rods sounds exciting, this is the movie for you. A car chase through Berlin is no more than a few collisions strung together. In one scene, a villain hides in a van just waiting for a stunt to happen. What’s he hanging around for? He could just get away!

Perhaps the biggest problem is that the film is so focused on how an organization could perpetrate this deception. The how is not interesting. What’s interesting is what it does to someone when their memory is questioned and their life is replaced. Unknown doesn’t explore that (it doesn’t count when Martin gets mad. He doesn’t reflect.) Unknown only uses memory as the plot needs, so Martin can remember a combination at the right time or something, never to build any real suspense.

He’ll reprise his role as slain Jedi master Qui-Gon Jinn in episodes of “Star Wars The Clone Wars” airing on January 28th and February 11th. Entertainment Weekly has a clip of Jinn contacting Obi Wan Kenobi in spirit form. Though most of the cast is rounded out by primarily voice actors, we shouldn’t be surprised that Neeson is turning up here. He loves to work and if Lucas didn’t cast him, he’d have shot his wife in the upper arm. Just the fatty part though. He’s not a monster.

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra

Cast: Liam Neeson, January Jones, Diane Kruger, Frank Langella

Synopsis: A man awakens from a coma, only to discover that someone has taken on his identity and that no one, (not even his wife), believes him. With the help of a young woman, he sets out to prove who he is.

Release Date: February 18, 2011

In a recent interview with the Belfast Telegraph, Liam Neeson talked Titans. Specifically, he confirmed that the sequel to Clash of the Titans will be called Wrath of the Titans, and the script for the film is on its tenth draft.

“I’ve only read half of the script and there is still some work being done—they’re on script 10—but I think it’s going to be som kick-ass stuff and a very human story to it.”

I’m really bad at detecting sarcasm, so I’m not 100% sure that the script has really gone though ten drafts. But even an idiot can tell that Neeson’s comment about the quality of the story was facetious. Good one, Liam. (Latino Review)

In the new poster for Unknown, Liam Neeson tries to cover up horrible acne scars and/or the dark side of his soul. Depends on how deep you want to get with it. Seriously though, was the actual Liam Neeson not available and they built a wax version then slid a cardboard box panel over half of a spotlight to shoot him? Oh you think they used something more advanced than that, like Photoshop. But why would a professional graphic artist use his skills in Photoshop to make Liam Neeson look like a deformed tunnel dweller? Our photoshops of Michael Bay placed into anything and everything look more realistic. (/Film)

Although nothing has been confirmed, many are speculating that Giamatti will take on the tattoo-artist role originally offered to Mel Gibson. Liam Neeson was brought on as a replacement for Gibson, but was then given a different part. Regardless of how it pans out, I have a feeling that this may finally be the film that gets the Oscar monkey off Giamatti’s back, assuming they give an Oscar for “Best Legitimate Actor Appearing in a Scene with Thai Hookers.”

^{"Okay, Mr. Gibson. If your career will just follow me this way."}

Liam Neeson continues to build his film resume of doing anything anyone asks him to do. As previously reported, Mel Gibson was lined up to play a tattooist in The Hangover 2. The news caused the cast and crew to revolt, which led to Mel losing the part. That’s when Bradley Cooper got on the horn with Liam Neeson and offered him the cameo role.

That’s good. I guess. It’s kind of a lame cameo though. Mike Tyson was clever stunt-casting, and his inclusion worked well with the first movie’s plot. Neeson seems like a total left field choice. And he’s in everything. Literally. Go through your DVD collection and look really hard during crowd shots. I’m sure he’ll pop up 8 times out of 10. (Variety)

_{Liam Neeson in suspended animation.}

Warner Bros. has dropped the new trailer for Unknown. Directed by Jaume Collet-Serra (House of Wax), it stars Liam Neeson as a guy who wakes from a coma and discovers that someone has taken is identity and not even his hot wife (January Jones) believes him. He teams up with a hot cab driver (Diane Kruger), who originally put him in the coma by crashing into a lake, to help him make sense of the whole mess. Neeson kicks some ass in it Taken-style, so despite the whole clichéd "why does no one recognize me!" premise, it could be worth checking out.

Unknown wanders into theaters February 18, 2011.

Check out the trailer after the jump…

Unknown — Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers

^{"You do not sink Liam Neeson’s Battleship."}

Liam Neeson may have missed out at the chance to play Abraham Lincoln, but he will be DAMNED if he misses the opportunity to work with Rihanna. Zeus has signed on to play an Admiral in Peter Berg‘s cuckoo-bananas film adaptation of the Hasbro board game.

More specifically, Neeson will play Admiral Shane, the father to Brooklyn Decker‘s character and future father-in-law to Taylor Kitsch (if you care about the soap opera aspects of Battleship). No word yet if the film will feature any Krakken releasing. (Deadline)

_{Your band’s new album cover.}

I don’t want to get you too excited this early in the morning, but Liam Neeson is going to take on wolves. Bradley Cooper jumped ship on Joe Carnahan‘s forthcoming directorial effort The Grey, and his A-Team co-star Neeson has taken his place. The film is about "a group of Alaska pipeline workers whose plane crash lands on their way back ome from a remote worksite. The workers then find themselves hunted by a pack of wolves."

Are you kidding me? When can I buy my ticket?! Liam Neeson mopping the floor with Frenchmen in Taken was tantilizing enough, but now he’s actually going head-to-head with wolves? Mother Nature better shave her legs ’cause she’s about to get f*cked. (/Film)

Lionsgate has dropped the new trailer for Paul Haggis’s The Next Three Days. Elizabeth Banks is married to Russell Crowe. She gets wrongly accused of murder. Crowe asks Liam Neeson how he can bust her out of jail. He then finds out how to put bullets in a gun because he must have never seen a movie or TV show before. The couple make a run for it. Overall lesson: Liam Neeson is a bad-ass.

The Next Three Days hits theaters November 19, 2010.

Check out the trailer after the jump…

The Next Three Days Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers

Director:Paul Haggis

Cast: Russell Crowe, Olivia Wilde, Liam Neeson, Elizabeth Banks, Jonathan Tucker, Brian Dennehy, RZA

Synopsis: A married couple’s life is turned upside down when the wife is accused of a murder.

Release: November 19th, 2010

^{Happier times.}

The Arrested Development: The Movie of biopics, Spielberg’s Lincoln, has suffered a further set-back. After years of waiting around and releasing Krakens and playing Jedi Masters and A-Team leaders, Liam Neeson is reportedly out this bitch. The formerly-attached star revealed to the UK’s GMTV that he’s "past his sell-by date" for the project. It’s unclear what he meant by that. Either he’s tired of waiting on Spielberg to get around to filming, or he’s aged too much to convincingly play the part. At any rate, Spielberg can expect a receipt in the mail from Neeson for one stovepipe hat. And he’d better not dilly-dally on paying. (Digital Spy)