Screen Junkies » Kodak Theater Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Wed, 26 Nov 2014 19:27:26 +0000 en hourly 1 12 Potential Sponsors For The “Kodak” Theater Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:04:29 +0000 Wookie Johnson Brett Ratner need not apply.

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Kodak’s announcement that they are as broke as a joke has caused a bit of a kink in this year’s presentation of The Academy Awards. The Kodak Theater and the Oscars go hand in hand, but now news that Kodak wants their name removed from the building puts the Academy in a weird place.

Provided the Academy doesn’t pull up and move to another location, Kodak’s exit opens the building to another sponsor, and the way we see it, here are 12 pretty solid contenders.

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7 Possible Locations For The Academy Awards Mon, 06 Feb 2012 15:31:12 +0000 Penn Collins Live from world famous Oakland, CA...

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Big news for the Oscars on the cusp of the 84th Academy Awards. Not only is Kodak, in the face of bankruptcy, looking to pull their name from the Oscars’ theater, but the Academy is currently perusing other locations for a possible venue switch.

Though details of the agreement between the Academy and Kodak Theater owner CIM aren’t public, it’s been leaked that there is an opt-out clause that can be exercised by the Academy that allows them to set up shop elsewhere.

The front-runner right now is the Nokia Theater in downtown Los Angeles in the L.A. Live complex adjacent to Staples Center. The Emmy’s take place there, and it’s slightly newer than the Kodak Theater. BORING. If you’re going to have the Oscars in L.A., have them in Hollywood. Few people know that Hollywood is mostly suit outlets and weird stores that sell bongs and ninja swords. If the Oscars leave town, then Hollywood will ONLY consist of suit outlets and ninja sword/bong stores.

That said, we need to find some suitable venues to host the Oscars. I don’t really think they should leave Hollywood, but if they do, I want it to be on my terms. Who am I to dictate such things? I’m a guy with a website, godammit.

Here are my suggestions.

Oakland Coliseum

The Oscars are perhaps the most exclusive awards show (or possibly even event) in America. That’s a very nice designation to have, by isn’t it time to get more egalitarian with the production and allow more movie fans to attend? Like, 77,000 more? If you think it’s going to be difficult to sell all those tickets, there’s a built-in market: Oakland Raiders season ticket holders. Get them on board, and you’ll have no problem filling the space. Plus, the ceremony is still in California, so wrangling up the stars should be no problem at all.

And you know how critics are always saying the Oscars telecast doesn’t feature enough convicted felons in the audience? The participation of Oakland Raiders fans will silence them as well.

This is my first choice.

A Giant Chuck. E. Cheese Built Just For The Oscars

The nice thing about this option (besides the fact that it has the Oscars taking place in a sweet Chuck E. Cheese) is that the sponsorship convention is already built in. The lauded Oscars and a funtime pizza parlor whose fictional proprietor is a giant anthropomorphic rat would experience obvious synergies. Wouldn’t you like to see Helen Mirren do her backstage press conference in a ball pit? If one of Sean Penn’s painfully preachy speeches goes on too long, wouldn’t it be nice to see him played off by this band instead of some anonymous symphony?:

The answer is yes.

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