Two neti pot users in Louisiana died after improper handling and maintenance of the sinus-clearing nasal kettle. No, they didn’t drown or stuff them up their butts. Rather, they died in the worst possible way — by falling victim to brain-eating amoeba. AAARRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!! Stay away from my grandmother, Neti Pot!!!

What better way to move past this tragedy than by laughing at it? Well, stop putting Louisiana tap water in your brain would be a good start. Other than that, we should take a walk down memory lane to recall the best instances of brain eating in film before the neti pot amoebas devour those memories.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Ricardo Montalban has the coolest stuff. Not only does he have his own midget, but in Star Trek II he uses Ceti eels to overthrow his enemies. The burrowing desert animal crawls into its victim’s ear and wraps around the cerebral cortex, leaving their host very susceptible to outside suggestion. As the eel grows, their host begins to suffer from madness before their eventual death. Is it any coincidence that ‘ceti’ rhymes with ‘neti’? I think not.

Skyline

In Skyline, aliens descend upon Los Angeles in order to feed upon sweet, sweet douchebag brains. The story centers on survivors trapped inside of a high-rise condominium as aliens continuously invade and suck the brains out of their victims — thus providing them with the energy they need to take over the planet. Fun fact: sitting through this movie in its entirety made me feel my brain had also been removed.

Big news for people who cherish their virginity: Star Trek 2 will not feature Khan Noonien Singh (a.k.a. Khan) as the villain. At least that’s what everyone else seems to be saying, even though it’s all based on an unnamed "source" who emailed Badass News. But if not Khan, who will be the antagonist?

"The e-mail read, “It’s definitely a character that will make fans of [The Original Series] excited. Think along the lines of Harry Mudd or Trelane or Gary Mitchell or the Talosians or the Horta. Actually it’s one of those that I named.”

Those are all fine choices, but I really feel like they should be utilizing the evil whales from Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. (Latino Review)