6 photosJulianne Hough

The story seems to be the exact same as the Kevin Bacon original, except now the high school students are crumping. Because all kids in 2011, even in the small towns, crump almost daily. The census taught us that.

John Lithgow‘s big, bad dad is now played by Dennis Quaid. Hmm…what else? The lead character shows up for the first day of school in a hipster tie, so it’s hard to feel sorry about everything that happens to him from that point on. Then Julianne Hough comes in with her attitude and sunglasses and hips. I like that.

And from there characters appear to race modified school buses in a junkyard. What? Yes.

The cast for the Footloose remake has finally been set. Yaaaaay… Julianne Hough is already on board to play the girl, and Dennis Quaid is playing John Lithgow‘s role of Strict Preacher Father. But I’m guessing you want to know who’s filling Kevin Bacon’s fancy shoes?

It’s Kenny Wormwald! You probably remember him from the MTV series "Dancelife" and the film Center Stage: Turn it Up, the sequel to Center Stage. He  can dance, and the film’s director, Craig Brewer (Hustle & Flow), must also think he can act. Why else would be turn down Zac Efron and Chase Crawford for at unknown? Oh and some kid named Miles Teller is playing the Chris Penn friend to Bacon role.

Listen, all of this is moot unless Kenny Loggins comes out of hiding and records a new song for the soundtrack. Or Kanye just remixes the original "Footloose" pop sensation. Imagine what Strict Preacher Father would think if all the kids were listening to black people music. Getting crunk is forbidden in his little town.