Screen Junkies » Jesus http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Fri, 28 Nov 2014 16:30:46 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 And Now Lifetime Is Going To Tell The Story Of Christ With ‘The One’ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/and-now-lifetime-is-going-to-tell-the-story-of-christ-with-the-one/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/and-now-lifetime-is-going-to-tell-the-story-of-christ-with-the-one/#comments Mon, 17 Feb 2014 17:28:12 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=259420 Lifetime: Television for Christian Woman

The post And Now Lifetime Is Going To Tell The Story Of Christ With ‘The One’ appeared first on Screen Junkies.

]]>
Lifetime, as eager to upset their role as a television station as they are gender roles, is going to step up their game from fictionalized accounts of domestic violence at the hands of Mario Lopez to telling the story of Christ.

It’s going to be an origin story. Was he bitten by a Christian spider? Was the death of his father, Joseph, a catalyst?

Maybe. It will tell the story of Jesus’ twenty-somethings, hopefully in a Apatow-like slacker fashion. Since very little is known about Jesus’ “lost” half-assing work at his dad’s consulting firm so that he could focus on his music, it will be interesting to see what the hell Lifetime does with this subject matter.

No doubt, though, that Tori Spelling and Tiffani Amber Theissen are both reading this, then working on their most affected Mary Magdalene voices.

The post And Now Lifetime Is Going To Tell The Story Of Christ With ‘The One’ appeared first on Screen Junkies.

]]>
http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/and-now-lifetime-is-going-to-tell-the-story-of-christ-with-the-one/feed/ 0
TV Preacher Pat Robertson Wants To Legalize Pot http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/tv-preacher-pat-robertson-wants-to-legalize-pot/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/tv-preacher-pat-robertson-wants-to-legalize-pot/#comments Thu, 08 Mar 2012 22:07:13 +0000 Jame Gumb http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=247088 Him being high would explain some of his previous quotes.

The post TV Preacher Pat Robertson Wants To Legalize Pot appeared first on Screen Junkies.

]]>
During his 81 years on this earth, Pat Robertson has said a lot of stupid things. He blamed hurricanes hitting Florida on gays visiting Disney World. He blamed the earthquake in Haiti on an alleged two-hundred-year-old pact with Satan. He suggested that someone should detonate a nuclear bomb at the State Department. But today, for reasons unknown, Robertson is actually making sense, calling for the legalization of marijuana.

“I really believe we should treat marijuana the way we treat beverage alcohol,” Robertson said in an interview with the New York Times. “If people can go into a liquor store and buy a bottle of alcohol and drink it at home legally, then why do we say that the use of this other substance is somehow criminal?”

Good question, Pat. I blame homosexuals.

Robertson went on to explain that while he feels the war on drugs has failed and is a waste of tax-payer money, he doesn’t support anyone actually using drugs and doesn’t use them himself, a fact that I find hard to believe considering he thinks gays are causing hurricanes. He must have been high as shit when he came up with that. (New York Times)

The post TV Preacher Pat Robertson Wants To Legalize Pot appeared first on Screen Junkies.

]]>
http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/tv-preacher-pat-robertson-wants-to-legalize-pot/feed/ 0
Jesus’ 9 Greatest Film Appearances http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/jesus-9-greatest-film-appearances/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/jesus-9-greatest-film-appearances/#comments Fri, 22 Apr 2011 23:03:29 +0000 Jame Gumb http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=208391 The power of Christ compels you to read on.

The post Jesus’ 9 Greatest Film Appearances appeared first on Screen Junkies.

]]>

It’s Good Friday, the annual remembrance of Jesus’ crucifixion and death. I’m not sure what’s so good about getting nailed to a piece of wood and then being left in the hot sun to suffocate under your own weight, but hey, whatever works for God. In honor of the (probably) historic event, and the upcoming Easter holiday, we’ve come up with this list of Jesus’ 9 greatest film appearances. The power of Christ compels you to read on.

Southpark: Bigger, Longer, UncutMatt Stone (1999)

Jesus is depicted as both a baby and an adult in this classic Monty Python film. The Three Wise Men visit the main character, Brian, while on their way to visit the Christ Child, and Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount is used as the backdrop for one of the funnier scenes in the film. “Blessed are the cheese makers?”

Passion of the Christ – James Caviezel (2004)

Sure, this movie gets a lot of flak just because the guy who made it is considered to be a raging anti-Semite. Even so, it’s a powerful film. And honestly, if someone walks away from this movie with a dislike for Jews, there’s a 99.9999% chance that they were an asshole bigot to begin with.

Jesus Christ Super StarTed Neeley (1973)

A lot of people love Jesus Christ Super Star. I’m not one of them. But I’m not going to trash a Jesus movie on Good Friday, especially not with so many outstanding bets on the NBA playoffs. God and baby Jesus, please let the Bulls beat the spread!

Bad Lieutenant Paul Hipp (1992)

Jesus is only in this film for a few minutes, but it’s definitely the creepiest depiction of the bunch. I mean, I know the Bad Lieutenant is on drugs, but would it kill him to wipe off Jesus’ feet before kissing them. I know he’s God, and all, but blood is disgusting.

Jesus of Nazareth – Robert Powell (1977)

This is a made for TV movie, but I added it to the list anyway. Why? Because actor Robert Powell’s performance as Jesus is one of the best in the history of film and television. Also, because I’m too lazy to go back and find another theatrical film. What can I say? God made me this way.

The Greatest Story Ever Told – Max von Sydow (1965)

George Stevens directed this classic retelling of the life and times of Christ, and Max von Sydow starred as Jesus. It was an epic role for von Sydow, but not as epic as his performance as Brewmeister Smith in the 1983 comedy, Strange Brew.

The Last Temptation of Christ – (1988)

Willem Dafoe plays Jesus in this controversial Martin Scorsese film. Many viewers at the time were outraged by its depiction of Jesus being subjected to human temptation, including lust. Still others were insulted by the blatant product placement, including a shot of Jesus being crucified on top of a TCBY.*

* Warning, I watched this film on acid, so my description might not be 100% accurate.

Ben-Hur – Claude Heater (1959)

Claude Heater’s role in Ben-Hur is one of the most memorable on this list, although you don’t ever see his face. In that sense, he’s a lot like Wilson from “Home Improvement.” And if my plan comes to fruition, both Jesus and the guy who played Wilson will have the whole “crucifixion” thing in common, as well.

The post Jesus’ 9 Greatest Film Appearances appeared first on Screen Junkies.

]]>
http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/jesus-9-greatest-film-appearances/feed/ 0 jesus-south-park